"You what?" I felt like I couldn't stop the words from coming out of my mouth at this point. I need to go to bed before I do something stupid.
I stood up, determined to get away from Andrew but because it's me, that didn't work out well. I fell backwards and landed in Andrew's lap, laughing when I realized no matter how hard I try, Andrew is right there. Always in the right place. I can't escape him and I was losing the will to even try.
Andrew laughed at my clumsiness, "you should really stop trying to walk away from me. It never works out."
My heart raced when he echoed the words I was just thinking. I turned to him to see if he was serious. That was my third mistake of the night.
When I turned to Andrew, our faces were not much more than a couple inches apart. I held my breath, but I couldn't look away. My gaze was locked with his.
I felt his hands on my back, gently pulling me closer to him. I couldn't fight him, I couldn't even move. I was frozen with fear. Not fear of Andrew, but fear of how everything in this moment felt amazing.
The warmth of his body so close to mine, the way I could feel his heart beat when I placed my hand on his chest. I'm pretty sure he could hear my heart beating out of my own chest. I couldn't remember why I was fighting him anymore. Why I would choose to be alone when I could have him. I ran my hand through his hair. It was soft and it felt good between my fingers.
"What are you doing?" he breathed.
"I don't know" I couldn't look away from him as he looked up at me through his dark lashes.
Andrew used his hand to push my hair from my face and then moved to the back of my neck sending shivers down my spine. His breathing grew heavier as I let him pull my face to his. I closed my eyes and our lips almost touched when Andrew stopped.
"Casey?" he whispered.
"Hmm?" I sounded, my eyes still closed.
"Casey" he whispered again. I opened my eyes and looked at Andrew confused.
"The last time we were in this position, you ran away and didn't talk to me for over two years" he explained.
"Oh" I looked down at my hand on his chest as I felt myself sobering up. "I should go to bed now" I determined.
Andrew didn't release his grip. "Please don't." I felt like all the pain and guilt that subsided while I was drunk, came crashing back and at overwhelming rate. I looked back up to Andrew, his eyes were pleading.
"I'm sorry Andrew" I breathed out and tried to move.
"No" he kept his grip on me, "don't— don't do that."
I cleared my throat, "do what?"
"Don't pull away from me. Not again" he begged.
"I should never have had all those drinks, this was a mistake" I rubbed my eyes.
Andrew' jaw clenched and he dropped his hands. It took all the will power I had to stand up, but I had to do it. I moved away from him. He leaned forward, resting his elbows on his legs and his head in his hands. Kind of like how Scott used to when he was stressed. My eyes began to water at the memory.
"Casey, I don't—"
"We shouldn't talk about this right now" I interrupted. I knew where he was going and I wasn't strong or sober enough to handle this conversation.
Andrew stood up, "yeah, you're right. I should probably get back to the bar."
"Okay" was all I allowed myself to say. He walked to the door, looking at me one more time before leaving. I hated myself for letting my guard down tonight. Andrew and I were in such a good place now. Finally able to be friends, and I ruined it.
I woke up early the next morning, exhausted after spending the night beating myself up for what happened with Andrew. I took a longer than normal shower to ease the massive headache I had. My first hangover the day of my mom's wedding wasn't what I had in mind, but then again nothing about my life is what I had in mind.
I went to make a cup of coffee and saw Dani just waking up on the couch. "Good morning" she yawned, her caramel brown hair in disarray.
"Morning! How was the rest of the party?" I asked as I started the coffee pot.
"You would know if you didn't bail out early!" she teased, sitting down at the breakfast bar.
"Yeah, I'm sorry I was just a little too drunk" I explained.
Dani laughed, "yeah it's a good thing Andrew took you home" she said looking at her phone. I flinched at the memory of last night. "So speaking of Andrew" Dani looked up from her phone with a smile, "I took your advice and asked him out last night."
"Oh?" I held my breath and forced a smile.
"Yup! And he said he would think about it" she swooned.
"That's great Dani!" I mustered up the best smile I could for my friend. This is what is best, and if she is with Andrew, I can't make any more mistakes.
After the coffee finished brewing, I went back to my room to get ready. I had so much to do, and I was already dragging.
Dani went back home to get ready and Rachel and Jack left early to check in to their hotel room before the wedding. Even though it was only an hour away, they didn't want to make the drive that late after working all night.
Caleb should be here any minute to load up some of the centerpieces in his car. Instead, and honestly I should have expected it by now, Andrew walked in. Unfortunately for me, he was in a black suit, and he looked way too handsome in it.
"Where's Caleb?" I came off short. My head hurt too much to deal with all my emotions right now, especially when he is dressed like that.
Andrew stopped, "he left, he asked me to help." I sighed and rubbed my head. "Are you feeling okay?" Andrew hesitantly asked.
"I'm fine" I muttered and began placing the centerpieces in a box.
He walked over to help me load the boxes, "do you think we could talk, about last night?"
"I heard Dani asked you out" I deflected.
"Please don't change the subject Case"
"I think it would be a good idea"
Andrew froze, centerpiece in hand, "you do?"
"Yeah, Dani is great" I finished packing up the rest of the centerpieces, including the one in his hand, afraid to look up. I handed Andrew the box and he set it back down.
"Why are you trying to get me to go out with Dani?"
"I just think it would be a good idea" I insisted, looking down at the ground.
He grabbed my face and held it in his hands so that I was looking directly at him now, "why Casey?"
I took in a deep breath and gently moved his hands off of me, "because you both are my friends."
Andrew's jaw clenched and he closed his eyes. When he opened them, his deep brown eyes were glossy, and I almost lost it.
"Friends?" he breathed.
"Yeah, friends" I shrugged to emphasize my point. I had to convince him that we could be nothing more.
"Right" he nodded slowly then grabbed the box to leave. "I'll see you later" he called out without looking back.
My heart hurt for Andrew, but I know I did the right thing. This is what was best for both of us. I reminded myself that the whole drive up to Acton.
I pulled into a campsite surrounded by tall Juniper Trees. Following the directions my mom gave me, I found the cabin she was staying in quickly.
"Casey!" she exclaimed when I walked in, "you found it here okay?"
She was wearing a white silk robe and her long brown hair was up in curls. Her make up was already done and she looked flawless.
"I did, you look amazing mom" I pulled her in for a hug.
"Thank you sweetie, but don't make me cry! Rachel will have your head" she laughed.
"Oh I'm sure"
"Casey, you made it! C'mon let's get your make up done!" Rachel said when she came in.
"But, I did my make up" I pointed out.
"Oh Casey, just let her do her thing" my mom defended Rachel.
I groaned, "fine! But please don't get crazy!"
"I think prefer drunk Casey much more" Rachel rolled her eyes.
"Yeah well that makes one of us" I admitted and sat down in the chair Rachel had set up.
"Rough night?" she asked as she began rummaging through her makeup bag.
"You can say that" I mumbled.
"Do you wanna talk about it? Close your eyes" she began applying eyeshadow.
"Maybe later, my head is killing me."
Rachel laughed, "yeah that first hangover is a rough one."
"No kidding, how can you keep doing that to yourself?"
"It's fun!" she wagged her brow.
"You're insane"
"And you look gorgeous!" she gestured to the mirror. I smiled when I saw that she kept my makeup simple and natural looking. I definitely looked a lot better than I felt.
"Now let's do something with this hair!" Rachel sounded mischievous as she clapped her straightener a couple of times.
After we were ready and pictures were taken, it was time. We waited in the cabin until one of the employees came to drive us to the part of the camp where the ceremony will be. We rode separately since I would be waiting at the end of the aisle.
I was speechless when I saw how beautiful all our planning came together. The wooden arch where my mother will enter through, the pink peonies that decorated the aisle and the even bigger wooden arch where Peter stood in his black suit with a pale yellow tie.
Soft music played in the background as I held my bouquet and walked down the aisle. I looked out and saw my grandma waiting in the front, sitting next to my aunt and uncle; Caleb and Jenny sat next to them.
My heart leapt when I saw Andrew and Dani sitting close together. I forced a smile as I passed, hoping he didn't see through it.
I hugged Peter once I reached him, "I love you kiddo" he whispered, his blue eyes already welling with tears.
"I love you too Peter!" I replied.
The wedding march began, signaling my mom's entrance. She looked angelic as she slowly made her way on my grandpa's arm. They both beamed as he finally got to walk his daughter down the aisle.
Tears welled in my own eyes as I saw Peter, crying happy tears for my mom. Which of course made her cry in return. They both shared their beautiful vows of commitment and promises to love each other.
I looked over at Andrew during the vows, even though I kept telling myself not to. He was looking right at me, his brows furrowed like he was frustrated. I wouldn't blame him, I've been making a mess of his life for long enough. My little slip ups are only giving him the wrong idea and I can't do that anymore. It was selfish of me.
After the ceremony, we took a few pictures with family before heading to the reception. I was blown away once again at how magical the reception hall turned out. The twinkle lights every where sparkled. The rustic centerpieces with pink peonies and yellow roses were just how my mom wanted them.
I sat down for the first time in a few hours while my mom and Peter shared their first dance.
"Hey Casey! This wedding is so beautiful!" Dani bubbled as she sat down next to me.
"Thanks Dani! I'm glad you could be here for it"
"Me too!"
Caleb and Jenny joined us with drinks. "Case, you want anything?" Caleb asked.
"Oh no, just water for me" I insisted, not sure if I ever want to drink again.
"Boo" Caleb sounded.
"Oh let her be babe" Jenny defended. Andrew sat down next to Dani and she made a point to scoot closer.
"I'm gonna go say hi to family" I excused myself. I think it's going to take some time before I'll be used to seeing them together. I walked over to where my grandparents were and decided this might be a better spot for the night. All the way across the room from Andrew.
