HEARTS DON'T FEEL THE SAME (ZARRY)

24

Z's POV:

"No. Wrong. Wrong. Everything is wrong. He is nothing to me. I don't want him in my life anymore", I mumbled and  scribbled on my journal, tears streaming down my face.

"I shouldn't have. He was obviously too high for me to reach. Just like the stars and I was the mud on the streets. I'm not someone who loses his control so easily. Why did I even do that? What happened to the Hazel beast? He isn't such a weak guy", I mumbled as I closed the journal and stood up, pacing the room restlessly, running my palms on my face repeatedly. The knock on my bedroom door brought me back as I opened it hurriedly to see my best friends smiling at me sympathetically.

"I'm sorry, Zed. I didn't even imagine that someday we'll be seeing you so broken", Louis hugged me tightly while Liam patted my back.

"Take a seat, lads. I'm not sure what to do now and where to go about from here", I whispered as they took seats on the bed. I pulled a chair and put it to next to the bed.

"How are you, bro?", Liam asked breaking the silence.

"Fuxked up", I chuckled humourless. "Can't ya see Lima? The renowned street fighter lost his title and also his life just within a span of mere months", I said as they shook their heads silently.

"You can try to talk to your husband again, mate. I think he likes you now", Louis piped up, making me look at him for a second before replying.

"How did you know that you loved Liam?", I asked making him confused but replied nevertheless.

"Probably since we just clicked together. It was more of a love at first sight for me", Louis answered with a wide smile, which made me jealous but I turned my head towards Liam for his reply.

"I loved his sassy nature from the beginning and of course he really knows how to hold me when I fall apart", he answered, as I shook my head in thought.

"But I couldn't reason out if someone asked me why I loved Harreh. You see the difference? For me, the way someone treats you with love, care and respect is the basic needs for love. And you both can see that Harry and I never really got together for two seconds. We were always at each other's throats since the day we met. Do you think that's love?", I wondered loudly making them glance at each other quizzically before Louis spoke up again.

"Every love story is unique, lad. We didn't click in an instant too. We couldn't actually count the number of times we fought with each other. We say the words we don't mean, we do the things we shouldn't but that doesn't mean we don't love each other. As far as I've seen, I can say that you and Harry do love each other but are in denial", he explained making me think about it before replying.

"Or we don't love each other. Just got to the idea of seeing each other's face 24*7? Maybe I was wrong when I thought that I really fell for Harry? It could possibly mean that I wasn't just irritated by him anymore", I put out while they heard it without interrupting me.

"Ain't that mean you love him?", Liam asked making me chuckle lightly.

"No. It just meant I didn't have any feelings towards him, not even anger or hate. So, his presence doesn't annoy me now as much as it used to months ago", I paused looking at their confused faces before sighing out loud and continuing. "I took my time, lads to think about everything that happened. I went through everything in my head. I could only say that maybe I started feeling comfortable around him. I didn't feel the need to be closed off. We mutually developed a friendship or rather acquaintance with each other that made us feel free. So, I came to a conclusion that whatever I felt for him wasn't love but a good friendship and affection", I ended while they just sat without any reply. "I know it's a lot to take in but I finally have a clarity in my mind".