Chapter 12

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A really normal title. But that is not the important part about this chapter. It's more the fact that I cannot trust my mind anymore. Like sometimes I wake up at 2 am other times at 6 am. And I'm complete awake... For me it's 3:40 am now and I'm writing this halter just because I thought it was 6 am.

Sakura PoV (don't ask why, just kinda felt like it ^•^)

(TW: slight mention of abusive parents)

I breath in and out.

Sure Yahaba is nice and stuff, and you can talk to him. But he's a fucking guy. A guy.

Not that I have something against him. But it's the wrong experiences I have.

Also it's not like I like girls just... Why does your soulmate have to be your partner? Why can you not be just friends with them? Or a they even really your soul mate? 

But now when I'm thinking about it. Yahaba and I sure are just friends. And there are a lot people out in the world who doesn't have a soulmate or choose heir own partner.

"Sakura, are ya ready to go?", the voice of mom's new boyfriend,  Suzuki Aito, appeared.

I smiled a bit, like I told Yahaba, he's really my favourite between them all. Sure there where other nice ones, but he's the first who wants to bound with me.

"Yeah, I'm coming downstairs, Suzuki-san. "

I earned a small chuckle from him: "I told you, it's Aito for you."

I smiled again.

"Then let's go out. And sure the art museum is fine with you? I asked your mom what you like, bu-"

"It's totally fine, I really enjoy visiting art museums."

"Okay.  Till later Yua! "

"Have you two", mom responded while leaning against the wall.

"Bye, mom!"

I still catched a small look from her. It meant when anything is wrong, immediately tell me

It wasn't like she doesn't trust Aito. It's just the bad experience. The last time she dated someone was two years ago.

But... They broke up because of me and...

This boyfriend of her was abusive towards me, in front of my mom he acted like he adores me. But when she was away, he was... terrible.

It's not like I hadn't the courage to tell mom or someone else. But I never found he perfect chance to tell her, 'cause he was always there. The police wouldn't be really helpful I thought,  I mean he literally worked there.

But then mom started to look at the small things I done. Like helping more around in the house, and squint togeher when I broke a plate, cause I was trembling nervous while doing the dishes.  Flinching away when she wanted to run her hand trough my hair. That I only wore longsleeved things. And then one time when he was away she asked, straight forward: 'Is he abusive?'

And that's the story, we went to police, and I got therapy, because at first contact with others were kinda hard.  And trust issues came. The trust issues got away after one and half year, but the problem with physik contact is still there.

"Sakura?" 

"Yeah?"

"You don't have to answer the following question, but I still want to ask."

"Then please continue."

"What physik contacts from me are okay with you.  You know ruffling your hair or  nothing if your not okay with it."

"Why shouldn't I be okay?"

"Listen, your mom told me. You don't have to talk with me about it, but I wanna make ure what's okay with you."

"Ohhhh,  didn't expect you to care that much..."

"Of course I do, I mean it's important to know with what the person who went trough things like this is comfortable. And besides when I was a child my parents were the same. So I know how uncomfortable it can be, even years after."

"I'm sorry."

"Don't be, I mean you weren't my parents. So for what are you apologising?"

Yeah he's definitely the favourite of all her boyfriends. 

Yeah, I know, this chapter hasn't really to do something with the storyline.  But I had no idea what to write, so I decided to write something about Sakura's past. Already in the beginning it was clear to me she went trough something. This idea bout her just stuck in my head.


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