Fist Bump (z.s.)

gone

Harry handed the phone back to Louis a took deep breaths. He didn't wanna be this consumed by someone but, he'd already let himself get there, and there was no way he was gonna be okay if Zayn left him.

Liam: "is he okay?"

Harry: "yeah he...he said he'd be back tonight"

Louis: "that's good right?"

Harry: "yeah but what about Paul?!"

Liam: "it's zayn, first of all, he's not gonna care about Paul, second of all, you think he'll let you sleep alone in here after the argument you guys just had?"

Harry just shrugged as if he didn't know, but he knew Liam was right. Zayn wouldn't leave him there, but he still felt worthless and like he ruined everything good he had.

Niall: "we were just about to head out to grab some lunch, did you want anything?"

Harry: "I haven't really been hungry no"

Niall: "we'll be back soon, call us if you need us okay?"

Harry: "mhm, thanks guys"

They smiled at him, glad he was calmed down for now, and left to grab some food for their grumbling stomachs.

Once they left Harry grabbed a cigarette from his suitcase. He always had an extra pack in case Zayn ran out, so he decided there was no harm in smoking one to get some stress out.

Plus, Zayn wouldn't find out.

He made his way out to the balcony and lit the smoke, inhaling the intoxicating substance and blowing it out into the city, wondering where Zayn was.

He finished it halfway, he never really had the stomach for much more, and he threw it in the empty ash tray without thinking.

It was getting later as the day went on, and Harry needed to do something to occupy himself, and to take his mind off of Zayn.

Just as he was coming up with something to do, he got a knock on the door.

Harry: "who is it?"

Paul: "it's me, Paul"

Harry sighed and opened the door. What could go wrong now?

Paul: "do you have any idea where Z is?"

Harry: "we got in an argument a few hours ago, he left without telling any of us and I guess, went on a walk. That's what the boys said."

Harry left Paul standing at the door, walking back into the room and sitting on the couch looking at him.

Paul: "you realize he could be hurt right?"

Harry: "believe me, it's the first thing I thought of"

Paul: "I came to get him to record for the next album but, I guess I gotta wait until he gets back"

Harry: "he should be back tonight"

Paul: "are you busy?"

Harry: "trying to find something to do, yeah"

Paul: "wanna come record some of your tracks, I had you listed for tomorrow but, wouldn't hurt to get a jump start"

Harry: "sure, let me change and I'll meet you down there"

Paul nodded and shut the door gracefully. Harry didn't feel like singing, especially not now, but maybe it could take some of the stress of where Zayn was away from him for awhile.

Out of habit, he checked his phone for any sign of him but there was nothing. He saw it coming, but he was still disappointed nonetheless, so he shot him a text anyway.

Harry: "I'm sorry. I miss you. Come back soon please. I'm worried about you<3"

He shut his phone off and shoved it in his pocket as he made his way downstairs to record with Paul and Julian for the next few hours.

Julian: "hey son, ready?"

Harry: "as I'll ever be yeah"

Paul: "hang in there, I just spoke with him, he's okay"

Harry: "but he won't talk to me"

Paul: "he's just hurt"

Harry: "but I said I was sorry a million fucking times, I just wanna see him!"

Paul: "I know lad, just take a deep breath, sometimes sorry doesn't work."

Harry: "I just want him to come back"

Julian: "how about we get some singing in, maybe it'll take your mind off of things until he does get back."

Harry wiped the tears forming in his lower lash line and took a deep breath, stepping in front of the mic and putting on the equipment he needed.

Julian: "we'll start with Half A Heart"

Harry just nodded. He did as he was told, giving it everything he had. His notes were there but the passion wasn't. He felt like it was ripped out and thrown on the floor.

Paul: "not feeling it?"

Harry: "I'm trying, I thought that sounded okay?"

Julian: "the notes were there haz, the passion was not"

Harry: "fuck I'm sorry, I just can't fucking focus"

Paul: "I get it, you're worried"

Harry: "I just wanna know where he's at, and especially now that he's mad at me. I just wanna fix what I fucked up."

Paul: "but remember what I said about not being together all the time"

Harry: "I'm sorry but right now, that's the last thing I'm worried about."

Paul: "I wish I could say the same, but if I lose my job, you'll have Simon in my position until they find someone else...do you want that?!"

Harry: "...I uh...no I don't"

Paul: "I love you guys more than anything, but we can't be selfish. I promise I'll get you two your alone time as much as possible, but you've gotta give me something to work with too son"

Harry: "I know, I'm sorry. I'm just stressed and I want him to be safe"

Paul: "I'm sure he is, he just needs to blow off some of his steam. That's how he is."

Harry: "I know"

Julian: "wanna try again?"

Harry put the headset back on and tried his best to focus on the task in front of him. He always had Zayn in the back of his mind, but thankfully he was able to get a few good takes in the span of a couple hours.