3.5- Harry

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she had arched her back into me and I could have fucking died right then. I could have died when my finger brushed the edge of her underwear, when she made that soft little breathy gasp escape.

fuck I was dead, dying, she had me good, so fucking good. I wonder if she knew what she did to me, knew how she raced through my head like a train on a loop.

stop fucking thinking about sex asshole.

and it was hard, so fucking hard not to think about it.

so hard when the image of her was so fresh in my mind. the feel of her body under my fingertips.

fuck, fuck, fuck, fuuuccckkk

I had stopped myself before I got too excited. more excited than I had already been and she hadn't even noticed and yet I was embarrassed.

embarrassed? since when do you get embarrassed?

since now, since Rosie, since I cared.

I wanted her in so many fucking ways and if she didn't want me in that way it was okay I could live with it. she was fucking perfect, everything about her was perfect. 

even that little fucking noise she made when I kissed her neck. I never cared for girls who made a shit ton of sound, it was always unnatural. but Rosie, fuck, Rosie made it sound so heavenly.

her soft lips, soft hands, moving over my body not knowing what electricity they brought me.

don't be an asshole and stop thinking about sex for once.

and I did, I pushed those images of her, spread out beneath me, the lingering feelings of her hand underneath my shirt, in my hair, deep deep deep down.

but when I saw her walking to the car, just as she had done every morning I couldn't help but let that image of her come to the surface. I cursed at myself for it. 

"hi," she smiled bucking her belt. she fixed the end of her dress, making sure it didn't ride up when she got in. that image flashed in my mind again, the feel of her upper thigh fresh on the surface. 

I had to clear my throat before I answered back with a simple greeting but it still came out rough. "hi,"

"Does your throat hurt?" she asked hand reaching out to touch me ever so lightly on my neck.

"n-no just haven't spoken must still be morning voice," I lied.

"I don't need a scratchy voice for our presentation I already sound bad as it is talking in front of a group."

"I wouldn't kiss you if I thought I was sick," I say reaching my hand out for her to take. even her touch brought back the image of her, hair laying around her, cheeks red, lips redder. "unless you wanted me to kiss you,"

fletcher makes fake vomiting noises in the backseat. "we said no boyfriend and girlfriend stuff in the morning time, save it for after school,"

"maybe you just need a girlfriend," Rosie joked as fletcher reached over rustling up her hair. even if she laughed I wanted to hit him for doing it.

"yeah yeah remember when I was saying that shit and you'd be all I don't need a boyfriend, boys are gross, well guess what I don't need a girlfriend, girls are gross,"

I could see her roll her eyes from next to me. she played with my hand, pinter finger doing circles in my palm.

"yeah rosies pretty disgusting," I say and she pinched her face towards me.

"don't even get me started on harry," she mutters flicking my finger lightly.

"hey joking counts as boyfriend and girlfriend stuff," fletcher says as I pull into a parking spot at the school.

it was my turn to roll my eyes. we did our things walking in different directions. and by the time I walked into math I was excited to see Rosie, I couldn't stop thinking about her but she wasn't in her seat. or any seat for that matter.

I pulled out my phone trying to see if she had texted me but the only message I had was from fletcher.

you don't have to take me home I'm hitching a ride with Ashton

I tried to ignore it and took a seat in my chair, watching the door, waiting for her.

but math passes and lunch started, I looked for her only to find her and fletcher arguing by the car.

they both shut up when I walked up and I swear I felt my heart stop. what the fuck was wrong? had I done something?

"what's wrong? you weren't in math is everything okay?"

fletchers eyes flickered between me and her before he shrugged, "I'm going to ladies with the boys,"

Rosie smiles but it worries me. I didn't know I could be fucking worried over a girl. not like this. why was I weak in the knees over what she said. it was probably small, I shouldn't have even cared, I mean if she wanted to skip math she could. she wasn't even close to failing that class so it wouldn't matter and yet I was scared shit less.

"I'm fine, just fell asleep in the library," she says hand already on the door waiting to open it.

"what were you guys arguing about, you know I'll kick his ass for you," I say placing my hand over hers to pull the door open for her.

"only about the movie we were going to watch after school, you don't need to fight him about that I'm still winning," she says climbing into the seat.

but I didn't believe her, I don't know what made me not believe her only that it felt off. I'd ignore it for her but I knew I wasn't getting the truth. I couldn't tell if it hurt me or not only that I felt sick just the slightest.

"Okay but if you lose I'll make sure to accidentally forget him when leaving for school tomorrow," I say and she laughs lightly shaking her head.

something was fucking wrong. it was my sexual thoughts coming back to haunt me. payback for wanting her so fucking much.

"did I do something?" I whispered hand still on the door. her head snapped up and she blinked fast.

"what? no, never, if you did I wouldn't be getting in your car waiting to have to kiss me," she says hand reaching out to touch me lightly on the cheek. "H, it's nothing to worry about,"

but I still didn't believe her, not when the hand that wasn't touching me was fisted in the edge of her skirt, not when her eyes darted behind me more than once.

but I leaned over anyway kissing her lightly on the edge of her mouth. she had a small freckle there that I couldn't help but dream about kissing.

"let's go get lunch," I say pulling away, sick feeling still lingering.

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