What do Legendaries get up to?

What the legends of Kanto/Johto do in their spare time

Why did this go from Sinnoh to Hoenn to Kanto/Johto? I really don't fucking know-

Also I may as well make this a crossover thing cause it's based off a roleplay so uh don't kill me for including some Hoenn and Sinnoh Legendaries-

Don't worry they're only mentioned, not actually there in person

***

Lugia: HO-OH WHY ARE THE CHILDREN CRYING
Ho-Oh: BECAUSE YOU SLAPPED THEM
Lugia: Mewtwo bet me I couldn't
Mewtwo: now I owe him money...
Ho-Oh: what kind of father are you??
Lugia: a special one :>
Ho-Oh: no you're careless, I don't go around slapping my children for existing
Mew: well you created them so I should hope you wouldn't

Lugia: ..wait
Mewtwo: wot
Ho-Oh: wot
Mew: wot
Lugia: how'd you create them..?
Ho-Oh: you uncultured swine I resurrected them
Mewtwo: who were they before?
Ho-Oh: we don't speak of that around here
Lugia: I thought they were Kanto eeveelutions
Mew: that's the working theory

Celebi: I have an idea
Lugia: slap the beasts too?
Ho-Oh: NO
Mewtwo: yes
Mew: NO
Celebi: well yes but no, how 'bout you two get together and take care of the birbs and doges TOGETHER? :>
Lugia: aren't we already together..?
Ho-Oh: oh so you're ACCEPTING THAT?
Celebi: oh yeah you are
Mew: for how long, exactly?
Lugia: dunno for a couple chapters now
Mewtwo: Wait WOT
Celebi: yeah, where were you?
Lugia: holy shit he doesn't know
Ho-Oh: do the children even know?
Lugia: wait

Mewtwo: where's the ship list I need to add to it
Lugia: wait there's 'mons on it??
Celebi: TELL US WHO
Mewtwo: uhhh *looks at Hoenn region*
Ho-Oh: latios and latias?
Lugia: they're related you fucking pig
Ho-Oh: are you blind I'm a bird
Celebi: the relationship is starting off nice
Lugia: WE'VE BEEN TOGETHER FOR AGES NOW

Mewtwo: well uh Lugia's right they're related so no
Ho-Oh: widbsosb... Groudon and Kyogre?
Mew: aren't they.. related too
Celebi: well no not exactly
Mewtwo: well Rayquaza insisted they'd be together so uh I guess not
Lugia: how do you know that, but not that me and Ho-Oh are together?
Mewtwo: shut

Mew: hey, aren't Dialga and Palkia together?
Mewtwo: the shiplist says otherwise
Lugia: well I'm glad it does because they're cannonly related
Ho-Oh: ..holy shit
Celebi: well Arceus ships his own children, so why aren't they on the list?
Ho-Oh: I DO NOT LIKE WHERE THIS CONVERSATION IS GOING
Mewtwo: wait a second he WHAT
Mew: that's fucked up in so many ways I-
Celebi: well it's true..
Lugia: maybe Giratina stops it, because logic y'know...

Mew: nah fam, Giratina ships it too
Ho-Oh: HOW ABOUT WE TALK ABOUT CRESSELIA AND DARKRAI, AND STAY AWAY FROM THE SIBLINGS??
Lugia: this feels like gossip
Celebi: it is gossip
Lugia: holy shit I'm committing teenager
Mewtwo: wtf
Lugia: *cough* sorry
Mew: I dunno whether or not Cresselia has the same feelings towards Darkrai as he does to her
Mewtwo: father please stop this is ironic
Celebi: do you even know what ironic means
Mewtwo: no
Mew: wait a second did you just call me FATHER
Lugia: *gasp*
Ho-Oh: DUN DUN DUNNNNN

Mewtwo: I mean it's like Articuno calling Lugia 'father', what's wrong with that?
Lugia: first of all, none of the legendary birds have called me father-
Ho-Oh: I can see why tbh
Celebi: didn't you try to drown them once?
Mew: no I think they tried to drown him
Lugia: shut up, anyways; second of all, they tend to call me 'Water' 'Disgrace' 'Bitch' and uh... what else..?

Ho-Oh: damn, all the beasts call me 'mother' and 'creator' and stuff like that
Mewtwo: wait a second you aren't even a water type
Celebi: NOW HERE'S WHERE I START SCREAMING-
Lugia: I beg you for the sake of Arceus' donut to NOT start that whole rant of me being psychic/flying and not water/flying
Mew: you're telling me you're a fucking psychic type-
Lugia: I said DONT

Ho-Oh: well I'm a flying/fire type so nobody really tells me off for not being psychic
Mewtwo: you don't look like a psychic type, that's why
Ho-Oh: true
Mewtwo: LUGIA ON THE OTHER HAND-
Celebi: *screaming*

Lugia: I'm gonna go to my kids and see what they say
Mew: wait they don't know..?
Lugia: I dunno tbh imma just tell them
Mewtwo: QUICK SOMEONE RECORD THIS
Celebi: I'm too busy screaming you can do it
Celebi: *proceeds to scream*
Mewtwo: I- mk

***

Lugia: Articuno, Zapdos, Moltres...
Zapdos: oh arceus the disgrace is coming
Moltres: oh lawd he comin
Articuno: I FROZE THE LAPRAS AGAIN OK IM SORRY
Lugia: I- again? Wtf is wrong with you
Zapdos: well Lapras is half ice so technically she should be immune
Moltres: you mean resistant
Zapdos: yes, shut up
Lugia: anyways, Articuno go to the bottom of the ocean for 5 minutes
Articuno: welp time to continue my conversation with Kyogre
Lugia: NOW
Articuno: IMGOINGOKCALMDOWN

Lugia: now Zapdos, I'm sorry to tell you this, but I'm not a water type.
Zapdos: ...
Moltres: oh phew, I'm not 4x weak..
Zapdos: wait a second how the fuck are you not water type
Lugia: ask game freak
Moltres: wait so you're pure flying??
Lugia: no, psychic/flying.
Zapdos: you're a PSYCHIC TYPE??
Lugia: yes, now shut up

***

Yes, Lugia is a psychic/flying type.
Yes, it makes no sense.
Yes, Ho-Oh did tell the beasts, only Raikou was shocked.

Lmao, get it? Cause, Raikou is an ELECTRIC type?
Ok I'm not funny I know..

Anyways, long story short, Suicune laughed her head off and Entei just started to bark, therefore erupting a volcano and killing every living being on Akala Island.

Yes, Tapu Lele is a part of that.

Your waifu is dead

Anyways bye hhh