What do Legendaries get up to?

{REQUEST} baby god

bro i. this is fucking genius how did i not think of it before

anyways! arceus is now a baby for a day. let's see how the hell that'll end.

***

Dialga: ya know, i think arceus is sick
Giratina: good- i mean uh why
Dialga: he hasn't yelled at me for my homework yet
Palkia: god giratina you must be starving
Giratina: why
Palkia: dad is the only one who feeds you
Dialga: i like that you refer to him as "dad" and i called him "arceus"

Giratina: you know what? fuck you all i'm gonna show i'm the superior legendary by checking up on him
Dialga: still doesn't mean you'll get a remake
Giratina: ...
Giratina: mission aborted, someone else check him

Cresselia: you're all useless, imma check on him
Giratina: please be dead please be dead
Palkia: i like how you went from caring to wishing his death when you realised he wouldn't give you a platinum remake
Giratina: shut up you sanityless shit

*and so cresselia checks up on arceus, only to find out he's a baby*

Cresselia: ok so i have news
Dialga: good or bad
Cresselia: honestly i'm not sure
Giratina: is he dead?
Cresselia: no, but you should be
Palkia: DAYUM
Cresselia: no i mean literally, you too dialga and palkia

*silence*

Giratina: haha come to hell with me bitches
Palkia: dayum?
Dialga: what
Cresselia: sodnsksn look

*cresselia holds up the baby arceus*

Giratina: DABABY??
Dialga: *smacks giratina somehow* shut up that meme is dead
Giratina: why is every meme dead
Palkia: guys our dad is a literal baby why are you fighting over dead memes
Giratina: LE BRON JAME-
Dialga: THATS EVEN MORE DEAD

*and so all the sinnoh legendaries are crowded along a table with arceus on*
*yes i mean legendaries and not mythicals, darkrai and shaymin don't get a peek*

Palkia: i have gathered you all here today because there is very important news i must share to you
Heatran: it is literally in front of us
Uxie: arceus is a baby.
Palkia: i was gonna say that i finally beat the ender dragon without cheats but yeah that too

Dialga: *pushes palkia aside and grabs a microphone* how did he end up like this? we may never know
Giratina: dialga you're the god of fucking time just reverse back and we can see what happened
Dialga: ...
Palkia: ...
Dialga: do you want me to?
Giratina: no lol

*and so baby arceus starts crying*

Regigigas: arceus please help i already have to deal with the regis
Mesprit: does he look like he can help you??
Dialga: ok does anyone know how to deal with a crying baby
Palkia: cresselia?
Cresselia: i know how to deal with a crying darkrai
Dialga: ok so what do you do
Cresselia: i throw chocolate at him

*heatran was about to throw a jar of nutella at arceus but palkia stops him*

Palkia: WAIT
Palkia: dad likes donuts more than chocolate. throw donuts at him!
Heatran: but we don't know where the donut draw is
Palkia: well fuck
Regigigas: does anyone here spy on arceus so they know where the donut draw is?
Giratina: *stands up* my time has come

*and so giratina shows it to them and everyone grabs a couple hundred donuts*

Dialga: i thought you stayed in the basement the whole time
Giratina: i do
Dialga: then how did you know where the draw was
Giratina: shaymin told me
Dialga: why didn't you just say that
Giratina: idk i wanted to refer to a meme

*and so everyone throws donuts towards baby arceus who stops crying*

Palkia: problem solved.

*but mewtwo walks into the room*

Mewtwo: h-
Dialga: mewtwo i am NOT going into the past to help you find your spoon
Mewtwo: ....
Mewtwo: welp bye th- *he spots baby arceus*
Mewtwo: HEY WHAT

Dialga: it's not normal to do that sort of thing smh
Mewtwo: no not you
Mewtwo: *points at arceus* HIM
Everyone: ...
Giratina: he's always been like that wdym
Palkia: shut up brother, um *cough* yeah idk how that happened
Giratina: i thought we talked about how i was your mother
Dialga: wait what
Mewtwo: WHAT

Palkia: DAD SAID YOU WERENT
Giratina: tch what does he know
Cresselia: why... why would you even say that
Mewtwo: this is getting weirder every second and i like it
Giratina: idk old chapter reference
Giratina: now shoo mewtwo

Mesprit: AND DONT TELL ANYONE ABOUT THIS
Mewtwo: you won't know if i do
Dialga: i am literally god's child i know what the fuck you do
Palkia: *whispering to giratina* does he...?
Giratina: *shrugs*
Mewtwo: but god is a child
Dialga: ....
Dialga: well yes but- wait a min are we next

Palkia: NO
Giratina: damn i miss being a baby. i hope so
Mewtwo: i don't want to turn into a motherfucking child
Dialga: why, are you embarrassed to
Mewtwo: *amber flashbacks* well n-
Mewtwo: hey wait does that mean YOU want to turn into a baby??

Dialga: ....
Palkia: but if he turns into a child then WE will
Giratina: i love that i keep dragging you along with me to everything
Mewtwo: hey wait why am i concerned
Mewtwo: i'm not even part of your family
Dialga: mewtwo, everything in existence is related to one another.
Giratina: ew inces- wait you guys are dating
Mewtwo: first of all, you still haven't answered my question, and two: WHAT.

*baby arceus starts crying again*

Heatran: WE NEED MORE DONUTS
Dialga: you know what just get out mewtwo
Mewtwo: if you have to deal with a crying baby then sure, happily
Mewtwo: also you still never answered my question
Dialga: WHAT QUESTION
Mewtwo: if you wanted to turn into a baby or not.

*everyone throwing donuts to arceus in the background*

Dialga: ...
Dialga: get out *slams door*
Mewtwo: HEY

*le next day*

Giratina: hello there baby arce-
*a normal sized arceus, sleeping on the table*
Giratina: ...
Giratina: FUCK

***

sorry it took so long aosjjaababnmbbnajg- exam stress is ✨ flooding in ✨

anyways take this chapter. will try and do the other requests lmao. idk if this is funny or what but take it before you all loose hope in me for like the 5th time