Ease and Hardship

Marwan

One day I went on facebook and I found a friend request from a man named Marwan, and I was quick to accept because I thought he might be an option for marriage. The next day he sent me a message saying : Marwan: Salaam! My name is Marwan

Maisa: Salaam! My name is Maisa

Marwan: I'm 24 how old are you?

Maisa: I'm 16

Marwan: MashAllah! You seem like such a good Muslim can I ask you a question?

Maisa: Sure

Marwan: I've been looking for a wife for a year now, and I was wondering if we can see if we would work well together for marriage?

Of course I was excited because this was what I've wanted, and I didn't tell anyone at time because I knew they would tell me to reject him. So I agreed and we messaged everyday. Eventually though I told my mom as a Muslim I knew it was wrong to not have consent from the parents before wanting to pursue someone. My mom was upset about the fact we met online and I have never met him in person, he could have been a fake. I kept arguing with her saying no he is a good man, and eventually she said she wanted to meet him to make sure he is who he says he is, and I agreed.

Marwan and I would talk almost all the time and I was happy to have a companion. Marwan would read Quran to me and would wake me up for fajr(prayer before sunrise) so I was always so proud of him. He then began to be very protective of me, telling me I needed to tell him anytime I left the house and always make sure there was someone with me, I thought it was very sweet at first until it got worse. He would tell me I had to wear abayah (kind of like a long dress). He would say I had to memorize the Quran and would always compair me to his sister that has the Quran memorized and also wears niqab (MashAllah). I began to feel worthless and as though I wasn't good enough. He would continuously pressure me to do things I wasn't ready to do at the time. So after two weeks of talking I told him I can't marry him and we never met him in person.

This was the first time I opened up my eyes and realized what I need to be looking for. Marwan was my idea of a "perfect" husband. He was muscular, tall, green eyes, and tan skin. I was so caught up with looking for that kind of man than I didn't know what was really important.

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Salaam! This is the first time I'm writing anything like this. InshAllah it turns out good in the end ☺️