Just Pretending

Chapter Two

~Chapter Two~

"What do you mean girlfriend?" I once again asked Louis, who was glaring at Harry. It wasn't like him to keep things from me, we told eachother everything.

"She isn't my girlfriend yet."

'Yet' meant he was going to ask her soon. I felt tears whell up in my eyes, which frustrated me. I wasn't supposed to feel this way about him. I was supposed to be happy for him, happy that he could be happy. But instead here I was holding back tears.

"So you've been seeing her and haven't told me?"

He looked up at me confused.

I couldn't help myself, I was angry...at so many things. "You're supposed to be my best friend Louis. Why are you just telling me about this?"

"Why do you care do much?" he shot back. His words stung for some reason...it was because he didn't truly know how much I cared.

I could have told him why, I wanted to..but instead, I backed out like always. "It's just big news is all." I looked away, trying to hide the tears that were about to spill out at any second.

"I know. I just wanted to surprise you! Demi, you will love her I promise!" his smile was so big and hopeful, I couldn't help but to force one of my own.

"Sure. I can't wait to meet her Lou."

Harry cleared his throat, "So should we be on our way then?"

I nodded and grabed my purse, turning to Niall. "Ni, can you give me a ride? I need to stop at home to change."

Niall nodded and stood. We only lived a couple houses down from each other so we often gave one another rides. He and I became really close after I met all the boys. He knew everything I felt about Louis..I had to tell SOMEONE and he was there.

"Dem?" Again, I was daydreaming. I looked up to see Niall and Harry with raised eye brows, "Harry's coming with us, are you ready?"

"Yeah..sorry, let's go." I followed the boys out into the car and climbed in.

Niall turned and looked at me, "Are you okay?" he whispered so that Harry couldn't hear. I sighed and looked away. He dropped it, thank God.

"So Demi.." Harry called from behind me. I turned in my seat to fully see him. He blushed right away, "How's your love life going?"

I felt a pang in my heart as Niall cleared his throat. All I could see was Louis face...his smile..his everything. Then I remembered that word, 'girlfriend.'

"It's actually horrible at the moment." I said, breaking myself off before I went into yet another daydream. "How about yours?"

He wrinkled his eye brows and pressed his lips together causing his dimples to pop out. "I don't really know yet..I'll find out tonight probably..hopefully."

"Oooo are you gonna find someone at the club?" I winked and wiggled my eyebrows.

Niall chuckled beside me, "You're such a weirdo!"

"Focus in the road Niall." I laughed, turning back my attention to Harry.

"Actually..I've already found her." he looked deep into my eyes which caused me to blush this time, "She just hasn't found me yet."

That's when I knew. This girl Harry had been talking about, that girl was me.

The car came to a stop right when I opened my mouth to say something. I silently thanked Niall for getting me out of this situation, that is until he said, "Harry's gonna pick you up around ten-thirty?" he looked at Harry and waited for his nod of approval. "I'm going to see how Andreas feeling, she's been sick, then I'll swing by the club."

I felt my heart yearn for someone like Niall. I loved his relationship with his girlfriend. They fought a lot, sure. But the love they had for each other was unmistakable. That's what I wanted with Louis..it's what I've always wanted with him.

I climbed out of the car and smiled at Harry, "See you later."

Once again, he blushed. Did I really have that sort of affect on him? Why haven't I noticed it before? I brushed off my thoughts as I walked inside my empty apartment.

It wasn't that it was big, it wasn't big at all for that matter, it was just..lonely. Ever since I moved out of my parents house to get away..I just felt alone. And when I felt alone, I thought to much and when I thought to much, memories surrounded my mind.

Louis was the one person that made me feel alright..he is the only one who knew about everything that happened. He would come over and comfort me when I had that same nightmare over and over again..

I shook my head to myself as tears stung my eyes. I hated remembering. Remembering that horrible fight with my brother...remembering that phone call...the sound of my mothers screams...no. I need to stop. I can't think about it now. Tonight was about celebrating Louis and the boys, not about me.

I walked into my bedroom closet and pulled out a black dress that I had never worn before. I pulled it over myself and it hugged every inch of my body, revealing my long legs and back. I let my hair down from its usual messy bun, which caused it to wave pass my shoulders, finishing up with some light make-up and perfume.

I looked over at my clock which read '10:12'. My eyes fell over to the picture frame that rested next to my alarm clock. I walked over and picked it up, focusing on the picture of Louis and I. Both of us were laughing as he was giving me a piggy back ride. I had ice-cream in my hands and Louis had some on the side of his face, which was the reason for our smiles.

That picture told so many stories. The way my head was turned looking at him, my eyes gleaming with love. But his face was forward, not noticing at all. I stared at the picture for a long time before I realized something. One of my hands was dangling close to Louis. His opposite hand was close to it, but reaching. Reaching for mine. My eyes grew wide, why was i just seeing this? He never held my hand that day but in this picture, he certainly wanted to....or am I just making things up in my mind?

The doorbell rang but I stayed focused on that picture. This was enough. That small hope inside me that Louis might have wanted to hold me, was enough. I didn't know for sure if he did, but all I did know was tonight I was going to make Louis notice me. Whatever it took, I was going to make him want me. As more than just a friend.