Find My Way Back To You

Chapter 36

~~~ PAST EMMA'S POV ~~~

Yesterday Cora has attacked for the first time. I was waiting for this moment, dreading it mostly. Luckily no one got hurt except one of the dwarves. Storybrooke will be much quieter for a little while, which is better since I need to focus on taking down Cora.

I can't let her roam Storybrooke. Especially not now that she has reconnected with Regina. Their magic combined is too strong. How am I supposed to beat them? I can't even control my own magic.

And it's even worse now.

I wouldn't need to worry about Henry. Regina might be evil, but she would never hurt him. He's safe. But he's not the only one I have to worry about now.

Hope is still in town. I haven't managed to get her home yet. It seems like Emma has a plan, but no one tells me what it is. Everyone has been unusually secretive for the past few weeks. It's weird.

"Swan, if you hit the keys of the magic box any harder, you might break them apart." Hook says from his seat next to me. We're currently checking surveillance cameras all over town for a sign of the witch.

I was so lost in my thoughts just now, that I didn't even notice Hook was still here. But he is. Always.

It's been weeks since he first accompanied me on my parole and he's been there every day since then. He's basically my deputy by now. It's just not exactly official, but it might be one day.

Emma did say we will be good friends after all. Maybe that's how that'll happen.

The weird thing is that the thought of it doesn't repulse me any longer. I'm actually glad about it. Hook is great company once you get to know him. We share a lot of similar trauma, if I'm being completely honest, which is nice.

He just really gets me.

"What's going on with you Swan? You seem vexed." Hook asks.

"It's just everything with Cora. I need to find her in order to defeat her, but we never run into her unless she wants it."

"That witch always has her own agenda, but don't worry Swan. You'll find her and then you'll defeat her." He sounds very sure about the last part. How can he be so confident we'll win? Things aren't exactly going our way – they haven't done that once ever since Cora got here.

"What makes you so sure about that?" My voice sounds quite anxious. I don't even recognize it as my own. I wish I could at least sound confident, but I can't hide my fear. Not with Hope's life on the line. I could never forgive myself, if something were to happen to my sweet little baby.

"You're resourceful Swan. I'm sure you'll figure something out. I've yet to see you fail." He smiles at me with huge amounts of sincerity shining in his eyes. He really means it. He believes in me.

He's wrong though. I fail all the time. I couldn't even find a way to help my daughter get back home and she's been here so long. But of course, Hook doesn't know that. He doesn't know she exists and that is probably for the best– no matter how much I sometimes want to tell him.

I can't though. I really can't.

I do trust him, it's not that, but I also believe that it's better if not so many people know about Hope. I don't want to somehow change the future after all.

"If I was resourceful, then Cora would be gone already. But she's not because all I'm good at in life is failing." I raise my voice a bit. I didn't even mean to do it. I don't want to fight with Killian. He seems to be one of the small amount of people, who actually likes me. I can't push him away. I can't lose him.