heavy-hearted | fillie

twenty eight

hey man, I like the look of you
i know your brains are stuck together with glue
do you like the look in my eyes?
i know it makes you horrified
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an: this chapter is very heavy so uh, if you're sensitive to this kind of stuff then I'd suggest you do not read this chapter. my dm's are always open - Lauren

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Millie told her Grandmother that she would tell her everything - soon, but she was grateful that she dropped it after Millie let her know that she wasn't ready yet. Millie was made eggo's, shown to the room where she could stay for as long as she wanted. She felt safe with her grandmother, almost like the feeling when she was with Finn.

Finn.

God, she missed him, it was the longest week she can remember. Even his name made her stomach tie up in millions of small knots. She thought about him when she went to bed that night, the bed sheets smelled just like her nans washing used to smell like as she allowed herself to lay out in a complete comfortable bliss. That was until she finally fell to sleep that night.

"Please, I'll do anything. Please, don't hit me it really hurts. I-"

"God, just shut up." Robert spat, hovering over her, he was a visual representation of a tv villain. His eyes were dark and fingers twitched as they collided with Millie's left cheek.

A gasp escaped her lips as she held in a sob, mouth open wide as she rested her palm on top of her cheek. She wasn't surprised that her own father actually hit her without any indication of remorse, this is what she'd call a normal evening in her house hold.

The young girl shook as she was sat on the cold floor, attempting to cover herself with her bruised, flimsy arms. It didn't do her much justice, it probably only just saved an eye getting hit. It didn't stop him from delivering a hard kick to Millie's ribs.

If it was slightly harder, her bones would've broken. The wind was taken out of her, like her chest was ripped in half and she was begging for breath. She couldn't breathe, she couldn't scream for help as she couldn't find the voice inside her to do so. She was useless as she sat there taking blows from the monster who stood tall in front of her.

She couldn't even cry at his point, this nearly everyday for the past year made her physically numb to any kind of human emotion. She was empty, cracking and if she took anymore blows she would shatter. She was shattering right there in front of the man who was her father, who stared down at her like she was nothing but a piece of shit on the sidewalk. She was nothing to the man and she knew it, he couldn't love her and put her through so much misery if he did.

"That's what you get when you beg. Stop fucking whining, stand up."

She was scared, that was the only emotion her body allowed her to feel. She didn't even know if she could stand, the unbearable pain within her stomach made her wince every time she moved a muscle just an inch. Her legs were shaking out of fear, too. Standing up seemed impossible, but she had to try.

Her palms connected to the floor as she leant her weight into them, attempting to stand and as she did so, Robert's foot collided with her side as she hit the floor hard once more. She let out a scream, she couldn't help it nor did she think of the consequences while doing so. It was agonising, exhausting - draining.