Two Turtles in a Pond (Tony Perry)

Chapter 16: When You Can't Sleep At Night

It was a little past 3am and I couldn't sleep so I was laid on the couch in the enclosed living room watching American Horror Story. Maybe it wasn't the best choice to watch before bed but oh well; I have watched the entire seasons several times and I'm in love with it. Great, now I sound like a creep to anyone who has seen it. Fuck them, I don't care what anyone says, Zachary Quinto (the actor) is hot! I wanted to sit in there as I didn't want to disturb anybodies sleep; that wouldn't be fair! When there was a quiet bit, I heard Mike and Tony's snores which was funny sometimes due to what was happening on the screen. Suddenly, the room door in reality swung open and Jaime entered before glancing at me. "hi, oh-" He started before I cut him off.

"Why don't you join me?" i kindly asked as I didn't want to sound forceful or pressure him.

"I-er, okay" He sat on the other end of the same couch and he was attempting to concentrate on the screen on the opposite wall after closing the door quietly. "Couldn't sleep huh?" He solemnly questioned, keeping his eyes locked onto the screen.

"Nah, I'm just having one of those nights I guess" I shrugged looking over at him. He was wearing a pair of black tracksuit bottoms and a loose plain white t-shirt as well as his lovely brown hair curled naturally. "yourself?"

"Just something tricky on my mind" He sighed and stretched his right arm along the back of the sofa resting it on the top how he usually does, away from me.

"Well if you want to talk to somebody, I'm here. You have helped me, I will try my very best to do the same." My comment manged to make Jaime peel his eyes off the screen temporarily, gave me a half-smile, and looked back again. What was playing on his mind?

"Did i really help you?" he asked, moving his head to my direction, his eyes flying around the floor as if he was following a fast-crawling fly.

"Yeah.. you made me feel welcome when I first arrived and you made me smile. You and your music was always there for me before I met yous and it still is now we know each other. You guys are the reason I held on until now. I remember in an interview you spoke about some of your troubled times, Vic's troubled times, Tony's troubled times, Mike's troubled times. it made me realize that I shouldn't beat myself up about things that weren't my fault." I breathed deeply trying not to cry but Jaime had watery eyes and that upset me knowing I have done or said something to make him upset.

"Wow, well, er, I am glad you have found us. We will always be here for you, whether we are physically here or not"

"Thanks Jaime, that really means so much" I leaned over to him and hugged him quickly as he tensed up so i pulled away. "May I ask what is on your mind?" I was curious but I didn't want to pressure him into saying anything or making uncomfortable.

I er, it's stupid" he bowed his head and twiddled his thumbs.

"It probably won't be. You know you can talk to me right? We are there for each other" I reassured. I know single-handedly know what's it's like for a thought to eat you away and not have anyone to talk to.

"I-I can't tell you" He stuttered, " I just can't"

"I'm sure Tony will talk to you"

"Those are the only two people I can't talk about this to" He sighed, placing his head into his hands.

"Oh" I harshly breathed, it must be about us two but what could it be? Tony is Jaime's best friend and I'm just some fan that got lucky. It's not like I'm special or anything.

"Sorry" Jaime mumbled, "I just don't want to hurt you or anything. You, you have gone through a lot and I don't want to add anything to that list" he spoke quietly as I turned the TV off. I reached over and gently rubbed his arm a little as a form of comfort for him. He slowly raised his head and stared at me with his red eyes. Oh shit, he's crying. Good going Flex! That's why you shouldn't open that mouth of yours. "Flex, I-I" he paused for a moment, "I like you okay. Like, like-like you. I'm sorry but I do and I can't do anything about that. I thought we could have had a chance together but then I saw you kiss Tony in your room. Okay? That's what's on ma mind. Okay. There you go. You happy now?" Jaime's voice was almost at shouting level and he was full-on bawling his eyes out while I was lost for words.

"Jaime wait" I called as he stood up and rushed to the door but I pounced like a tiger in front of it so he couldn't leave. "Jaime I'm sorry okay. I never knew otherwise, yeah, maybe you would've had a chance. i didn't have feelings for him until he kissed me and then, then, I don't know. I'm sorry you had to find out this way" i was crying as much as Jaime at this point. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry" I repeated quietly breaking down, placing my head in my minds. "I'm so fucking stupid goddammit" I whispered to myself.

"You are not stupid Flex.You never knew okay? It's not you're fault. Please don't blame yourself" Jaime pulled on my arms so he could look at me in the eyes, "none of this was your fault"

"Well it's not yours" I wearily replied, attempting to smile as he did the same.

"I hope you are happy with him and he better treat you right or oh god help him" Jaime actioned punching him, "you deserve somebody like him and-"

"you" I cut him off and he smiled.

"you're the one who said it!"

"it's true" I replied and he shook his head so I grabbed his head with both my hands either side. "It is true. Any girl would be lucky to have you" I smiled and kissed him on the lips. There was nothing meant by it other than he obviously likes me but can't have me so at least be kind to him. Quickly pulling away, his little face lit up like a child's on Christmas morning. "Anyways, I'm going to bed. See you later"

"I'm not sure I can sleep after watching that show. How do you watch it? It's creepy as shit!" Jaime exclaimed like his old self referring back to American Horror Story. Laughing, i shrugged my shoulders and left the room to climb into bed with Tony. Poor Jaime, but I  really like Tony. As horrible as that sounds, he will have to deal with that.