Our Love Will Be Remembered

Our Love Will Be Remembered... (Ch 8)

Chapter 8

After Wendy I went through a weird phase. I think that deep deep down she was the one I had loved the most by then. Maybe it was because I had worked so hard for her, maybe it was because I ended it so soon... maybe I had ended it too soon...

That thought started to fill me. What if it had been too soon? With her. With all of them. What if, what if, what if...

I went to stay to my aunt's house for a month after killing Wendy. For some strange reason, after the dog incident, I had started to actually enjoy the woman. And my mother had never really been there for me, never been understanding, but my aunt for some sick twisted reason seemed to...

She listened to me, she had the proud look a mother would have had when her son would be speaking about his studies, how college was going, what were his plans... And there was something soothing about her house in the forest, almost like I was on a pilgrimage. Being close to the nature made me feel better.

I wasn't planning on going back to college. It would have been weird, it might even have been hard, to walk in the same halls has Wendy had, to sit in the library especially my dorm room would have been hard to stay in.

I think I had really loved Wendy, and it was a good thing in a sense because I had to experience that lost in a way. If I wanted to experience all the loves I had to feel that longing, and it had never been as strong.

So I wasn't planning on going back to college. I actually wanted to go and travel. My aunt thought it was a good idea. She said it would be good for me, that a change could be nice.

I don't know how much she knew, if she had figured out anything, if there were rumors about me... but she always had that understanding look, so I decided that I would travel. Pack a bag and go around the world, maybe do some humanitarian work... and find new girls to love, girls to replace Wendy in my heart.

So while I stayed at my aunt, I read and I took walks in the woods, going back quite a few times where I had killed the dog... And I talked with my aunt. She talked about how she wanted to start a foster home for kids in needs, how she wanted to help people, how it could be a good thing and she offered me to help, if I wanted, after traveling of course.

The last night I stayed there, we started to talk about my mom, about how much her work was important and about my dad and how everything seemed to be like water under the bridge for him. And then she started to talk about my sister...

"It's sad, what happened to your sister but-"

"No, it's not sad, it wasn't sad. It was unnecessary. There's a difference between the two."

"I know you loved her but son, you have to move on and forgive. Learn to forgive. Learn to let go."

If only she really knew how much I was capable of letting go, of how much I had let go...