Just a little Glorybringer for ya

Failed Flirting

A/N:  For a laugh....Or seven...

"Hmm, haven't I seen you somewhere before?" Macaw asked flirtatiously. Joy sighed. This dragon. This obnoxious, annoying, aggravating, putrid dragon. Would. Not. Shut. Up. 

"Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore." she replied sharply, walking to a scroll rack in the library. Macaw followed her like a loyal dog. 

"I think I could make you very happy." he retorted. Kelp glanced up at them from a table, his eyes narrowing at the sight of Macaw.

 "Why? Are you leaving?" Joy asked hopefully.

 "Oh, come on. You love me. Just admit it and make everything easier." he pleaded, leaning against a scroll rack. "Go on. don't be shy. Ask me out." 

"Okay," Joy agreed. She pointed at the door. "Get out." 

"If the lady insists," he said with a flirty wink. The second he was gone, Joy let out a frustrated scream and sank into a chair next to Kelp. 

"Who was that?" Kelp questioned, trying not to sound as suspicious and jealous as he felt. 

"Only the most repulsive, abominable, repugnant, loathsome, foul little gnat the world has to offer." she replied. "And of course, he has unfortunately set his sights on me."  

"Well, for starters, you've been spending way too much time with Nightflyer if you can list all those synonyms." he began. "And, if he becomes a problem, do let me know and I will gladly dispose of his dead body somewhere quite unpleasant." 

"Don't worry," Joy assured him. "That odious cockroach is the last dragon on the planet you need to be worried about." 

"Oh, Joy. Where have you been all my life?" Macaw said dreamily. 

"Hiding from you." Joy replied. 

"Ah- ah-ah!" he continued. "You aren't allowed to speak. Today you can only address me with song." 

"Songs." Joy repeated. 

"Yep." 

"Well, here's a song for you. Row, row, row your boat, Stay away from me! Merrily, merrily, merrily, merrily, I want you to leave."

"I want you to describe me in one word." Macaw declared.

 "One word huh? Hmm, let me think." Joy responded. Kelp watched on, slightly amused. Sure, he could easily bash this dragon's head in, but it was much more entertaining to watch Joy shoot him down. "Since narcissistic is too big of a word for you, how about asshole? Do you understand asshole?" she asked. Kelp buried his snout in his talons to smother his laughter. That was definitely one of her better comebacks.

"Do you believe in love at first sight, or do you want me to walk by again?" Macaw asked. 

"Walk by, but this time, don't stop."  Joy announced. 

"I can see forever in your eyes," Macaw proclaimed. 

"funny, cause all I see is never in yours." she retorted.

"Every kiss begins with K!" Macaw protested. 

"Oh, thank you for reminding me." Joy agreed as she walked over, grabbed Kelp, and kissed him.

"I'm no cactus expert, but I know a prick when I see one." Joy announced. A moment later, she pointed at the door just as Macaw walked in. 

"Shhhhh." Joy whispered. Macaw stopped talking. "If you listen very closely you can hear the glorious sound of you shutting the fuck up." 

"Bitch." Macaw whispered as he walked by. 

"I've been called worse." Joy proclaimed. 

"Like what?" 

"Your girlfriend." she replied, with a disgusted look on her face. 

"You'll never find anyone else like me Joy!" Macaw declared. 

"THAT'S EXACTLY THE POINT!" Joy proclaimed. 

"Did you hit your head when you fell from heaven?" Macaw questioned. Starflight bit back a laugh. The two of them had been doing this for weeks. It really was quite amusing. 

"No, but I did scrape my knee crawling out of hell," Joy countered, reshelving a scroll. 

"Oh, that explains it." Kelp announced. 

"Explains what?" Joy asked. 

"Why you're so hot." Kelp said obviously, not missing a beat. Joy stared at him for a moment before turning to Macaw. 

"You." she said, pointing at him. "Take note." She pointed at Kelp. "That, is how you flirt with someone."