The Little Black Book For Guys: Guys Talk About Sex

Before We Had Sex

Anonymous, 17

It was a simpler time, before I first had sex. There was just so much less to worry about. All I was concerned about was that I had feelings for a friend, and that she was beautiful. We could talk for hours, about anything…the weather, songs, our families.

It didn’t matter. My friends told me “You’re soft, man…why haven’t you hooked up with her yet?” I tried not to care about what they had to say, even though I thought they did have a point.

But soon she and I began to grow closer and so did our bodies. We started to touch. First, we just held hands, and then our lips met. This continued for a while and then we got more serious. My hands would explore her body and hers mine. I’d touch her face, her breasts, and her booty. Eventually, my hands would go down below. She’d squirm with anticipation when I touched her.

For a while it was great. That’s all we needed. We were comfortable with each other. I didn’t need sex; however, one day, the sex conversation came up. She wanted to—you could even say she was eager. I, on the other hand, well, honestly I was afraid. I had so many questions. What if the condom breaks? 

What would happen if we became pregnant? I was worried, so I talked to a few people about it. Some said I should wait. Some said to do it. Everyone said, if I did it, to use a condom.

I chose to go for it. We decided to do it when her parents went away for the weekend. I’d bring the condoms. That night, we were in her parents’ bed and then I was inside her and…wow. I don’t know how to explain it, just wow.

The next few weeks were chilling. We had sex several more times. But, eventually we started arguing about little things. 

Then our fights increased in number and in size until one day neither of us could stand it. We had once made each other extremely happy, but now we made each other extremely sad. We decided to have a break from each other. I don’t really believe in breaks because they always eventually lead to breakups, and this situation was no exception.

I’ll always have a place for her in my heart, but one can’t live with the past forever. In the end, it worked out for the best. We still talk and I still have no regrets. I’m glad we had sex and that there was never a problem with the condom. ’Cause even though we never had a pregnancy scare, we still broke up—how would we ever have handled getting pregnant?