Suicide Attempt • Larry Stylinson

• Chapter 22 •

Louis was silently crying outside the school, laying on a cold park bench. He had made sure to grab his jacket from his locker on the way out to not catch a cold, since it was almost December. He was laying on his back with his face facing the almost white sky with his eyes closed. His feet dangling over the ground with his knees hooked up on the armrest of the bench.

''You okay?'' A voice asked as he felt a presence sit down beside him.

''What do you think, Niall?'' Louis asked, without opening his eyes.

''Probably not. I can't imagine how you must feel,'' Niall said honestly as he studied the other boy's face. He was cute, Niall admits.

''Well, quite shitty,'' Louis sighed.

''You don't deserve any of this,'' Niall replied. The blonde boy felt sorry for Louis but he was too afraid do something against it in the action. Sure, he had gone to Harry's house last night to somewhat confront him, but that didn't mean he'd do the same to some other guys in the action. He was too afraid to stand up for Louis in that cafeteria only a few minutes ago, and quite honestly, he felt a bit shitty for that.

''Well, obviously I do,'' Louis confessed, opening one eye to look into Niall's blue ones.

''No, Louis, don't say that!'' Niall said sadly.

''But I fucking do deserve all of this. As they say, I'm just a piece of shit.'' Louis had now let his tears stream out of his eyes.

''No you don't, you are a perfect human being and you should not let others try to push you down, Louis. Whatever anyone says, you shouldn't listen. They have no right to say those things about you. And about being gay, that is just an excuse they have to bully you. Being gay is not a sin as some say, it's totally natural and one does not deserve to be humiliated because of its sexuality. I think Harry and all of those people who push you down are just searching for a higher status in school and that is absolutely disgusting. They think that making others feel bad about themselves are going to make them popular. But the most important thing is that you should stay true to who you are and not let others affect you. Louis, please remember that!'' Niall said and Louis was full out crying because of Niall's ever so kind and meaningful words.

''I know that you are having a though time right now, dealing with life. But things will get better. You just have to wait,'' Niall said, looking into Louis glossy eyes.

''I don't know how much longer I can wait, though,'' Louis confessed, closing his eyes again to keep himself somewhat strong and to not let himself be seen vulnerable, at least not in the middle of the school garden.

''I know, but I'll help you through everything. And if you ever feel like talking, I'm right here to listen, always.''

''Always?'' Louis asked.

''Always.'' Niall promised.

The two boys sat on the bench for another twenty minutes, just keeping small talks with each other as they enjoyed the winter weather. This was Louis' favourite season of all time. He could wear big sweaters and cozy clothes without anyone thinking he's crazy. The big sweaters with long sleeves could also easily cover up his scars on his arms and that was great, Louis thought. And with his big clothes he could hide his thick thighs, round and chubby tummy, fat arms and his way to round booty, as Louis would describe himself.

''I think we need to go now,'' Niall hummed softly.

''Why?'' Louis asked.

''We have school, you know? Our next class start in 3 minutes,'' Niall said, laughing a little at Louis oblivious mind.

''Oh, right. School. . .'' Louis sighed, completely dreading to walk into the school once again and seeing all those people's disgusted faces when they'd look at him.

''Yeah, now let's go!'' Niall said, feeling sympathy for Louis as he stood up.

Louis threw his legs off of the arm stand and stood up, shaking his legs a little to let blood rush trough them.

They then walked into the school, Louis with his head low to avoid people's staring and pointing.

''I'm just gonna grab my books,'' Niall said before he patted Louis on the shoulders and walked away.

Louis looked at Niall's ass as he leaved, he was wearing black skinny jeans with a green t-shirt sitting tight over his petite body. Louis looked away and smiled, he was so fucking glad that Niall wanted to be his friend. It was actually quite unbelievable.

''Looks like the faggot is alone again,'' a voice rang through the hallway. Louis looked behind him and saw Josh, Robin and Harry standing there. It was Josh who had said the sentence.

Louis turned his back to them as he took out his English book and leaved his jacket in the locker, then he closed the door again and turned around.

''I leave this to you my friend,'' Josh said as he looked at Harry. It was odd seeing the 'gang' without Zayn there and Louis couldn't help but hope that Zayn had changed sides.

''Go ahead, punch him in that pretty little face of his,'' Josh urged as he pushed Harry forward.

Harry now stood merely centimetres away from Louis face and the older boy immediately swallowed his pride. Harry leaned in and his hot breath tickled Louis' ear. ''Sorry,'' Harry whispered before he backed away and threw a punch into Louis' stomach. Causing him to bend forward in an attempt to catch his breath. The hurt boy looked up and stared into Harry's eyes, he saw no emotion. Just a pair of eyes looking back at him with a blank face.

Harry backed away and his friends laughed as Robin spitted out a loud, ''baby girl,'' before they left.

Louis stood up and brushed off his clothes. ''Fucking perfect,'' he swore before he went to find Niall.

As he neared the classroom he felt his phone vibrate in his pocket, he picked it up and looked over the message from an unknown number.

We need to talk -Z

It read. Zayn? Zayn as in Zayn fucking Malik? Zayn as in Liar Zayn? Zayn as in Harry's motherfucking friend? That Zayn? But how could he get a hold on Louis number? And why did he need to talk? Louis was confused.

He also couldn't wait to go home and make himself bleed, to feel that power again. The power of his physical pain and emotions. He just wanted to die again.

•*•*•

Don't worry, Harry confuses me too.

And sorry, this chapter is really shitty.