Today is the day. After school Louis will go home and write a letter. A suicide letter where he'll tell the world that he's taking his own life because of Harry Styles. Or, maybe he'll even do a video to send to Harry so that he can watch him taking his own life because of him, then he'll be happy and Louis love seeing Harry happy, even though he is the main reason to all of this.
Louis sat in his math class looking out the window. He didn't even bother to listen to what the teacher was saying since it wouldn't really matter anyway.
''Mr. Tomlinson, could you answer that question?'' He heard the math teacher say to him with a tone of annoyance, which woke him up from his thoughts.
''The gay boy is too busy working in the math-book that he can't even hear the teacher," someone laughed.
The class did the 'ow' at him and he wanted nothing else than just disappear for a moment, but unfortunately he couldn't so he decided to just stay silent. He hated every single bit about school, why wouldn't they just let Louis be gay and leave him alone for one day?
''Language," the teacher Mrs. Flack said to whoever humiliated him. ''Lets just keep going shall we?''
Louis let out a breath of relief and then brought his gaze outside the window again. The sun was shining which were a bit odd since they're in England and it always seems like rain and clouded skies are the only thing that you could ever get a sight of.
Suddenly Harry walked in with a smirk on his face. Louis couldn't help but notice the way his curls were perfectly hanging over his eyes today. Not to mention the black skinny jeans which sat so tight that he didn't even know how he was able to walk. And of course his ass looked more than delicious in those jeans.
He started walking towards Louis but however, to his luck, he sat down next to his friend Zayn. Louis thoughts took over him once again and he didn't even hear the teacher telling them they were dismissed. What so ever woke him up from his thoughts were Harry howling at him that he should move his fat ass and come to him.
Louis gathered his stuff and put them in his black backpack before he slowly walked towards where Harry and his friends were standing.
''Uhm, hi?'' He said when I got to them, it sounded more like a question than a statement though.
''Hello there useless fag," Harry said while pushing Louis against a locker. His head started spinning and everything around him became a blur.
''Not today,'' Louis pleaded.
''So what? Do you think I'll let you go today just because you fucking asked for it?'' Louis couldn't help but feel ashamed that he could even think about something that stupid. Of course Harry wouldn't leave him alone even if world war 3 was breaking loss. ''Hell to the no,'' he continued.
Harry then kicked Louis between his legs and the pain shot right through him. His friends started laughing like always, which only promoted him to continue. The pain Louis felt this time was more than usual. It felt like Harry had hit the exact right spot where all Louis sensitivity were led to.
''Hey, break up!'' Someone yelled form the corridor and Louis didn't even realise the voice was talking to Harry until he felt his shirt being released from Harrys grip and he fell down to the ground. Man, the one telling Harry to stop got some guts.
''Who are you? Maybe Louis boyfriend huh?'' Zayn said while Harry threw another kick, at Louis left leg this time.
''Yes, who the fuck are you? You have no right to talk or even look at me, stupid cunt,'' Harry continued after Zayn's words were out.
Louis took this opportunity to run away from Harry and his friends. He didn't even bother to look back and watch whoever stood up for him, he just needed to get away from everything.
His school bag was thrown lazily over his shoulders and the cold autumn wind was hitting his face like a truck.
Sooner or later he got to his doorstep and quickly took a breath of fresh air. It was almost becoming a regular thing now, running from school because of Harry. Louis opened his school bag and took out the house key and then slowly opened the door.
No one was home of course, he had planned everything out perfectly since he didn't want people to find him while committing his suicide.
Louis leaved the door unlocked and then went to the kitchen counter to take out a glass and then pour some water into it.
He took a clunk and let the cold water relax him from top to toe. His fast breathing also immediately became slower and more controllable.
He then walked up to his room, towards his death. Okay that sounded really dramatic but at the same time it's true.
Once he closed his bedroom door he threw himself down on the bed and put his earphones in. He then pulled up his sleeves and looked at his too many scars while music from Britt Nicole slowly took over his mind and he sank into his own little world.
Little boy terrified
He'd leave his room if only bruises would heal
Louis only leaves his room for school, no other times because he doesn't feel comfortable around people knowing that they might see his scars. See how broken he is and then get disgusted by the fact that he's gay.
A home is no place to hide
His heart is breaking from the pain that he feels
He's breaking more and more for every second and there simply is nowhere to hide. Not at home, not at school, not outside in the world. Nowhere.
Every day's the same
He fights to find his way
He hurts, he breaks, he hides, and tries to pray
He wonders why, does anyone ever hear he when he cries
His prayers won't seem to help and he's sinking into this hole of darkness. No one hears him. No one cares. No one sees that he's broken and needs a lifesaver.
Today he's turning sixteen
Everyone singing, but he can't seem to smile
Because he's scared and neither of you care about him.
They never get past arms length
How could they act like everything is alright?
Nothing is alright and he wished someone could see it and help him out of this darkness that he's in.
He's pulling down his long sleeves
To cover all the memories that scars leave
He wears sleeves everyday to hide his mistakes and pain, he hides his weakness.
He says, "maybe making me bleed
will be the answer that could wash the slate clean"
But cutting only helps at the moment and it will never make the pain and depression disappear forever.
Every day's the same
He fights to find his way
He hurts, he breaks, he hides, and tries to pray
He wonders why, does anyone ever hear he when he cries
Nothing helps and even if he cries and wish for his death, nothing will happen.
This is the dark before the dawn
The storm before the peace
Don't be afraid 'cause seasons change and
God is watching over you
He hears you
This is just the storm before his death and his well earned peace.
Every day's the same
He fights to find his way
He hurts, he breaks, he hides, and tries to pray
He'll be just fine, cause now he hears him when he cries
Harry will see the video and he'll hear all of Louis' cries, see all his scars, realise how much he's been hurting him and then finally, someone will hear him when he cries. Even though it will be too late.
Every day's the same
He fights to find his way
He hurts, he breaks, he hides, and tries to pray
He'll be just fine, cause now he hears him when he cries
He'll be just fine, cause now he hears him when he cries.
YOU ARE READING
Suicide Attempt • Larry Stylinson
FanfictionLouis Tomlinson hates his life and he's going to end it on Friday. He will also live stream himself taking his own life to his bully, Harry Styles, the schools most popular guy, because believe it or not; Louis is in love with Harry and he wi...
