Suicide Attempt • Larry Stylinson

• Chapter 03 •

•*•*• Please, listen to 'Breathe Me by Sia' when reading this chapter. •*•*•

Louis woke up from the flashback by his own screams. He screamed like there was no tomorrow, he let all the emotions he's been holding in for too long out.

''WHY LIAM? WHY DID YOU HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING STUPID AND DRIVE HOME ALONE IN THE WINTER?'' Louis screamed.

''WHY DID YOU HAVE TO DIE?''

''WHY DID YOU LEAVE ME ALONE ALL BY MYSELF?''

''YOU'RE SO SELFISH, YOU SHOULD HAVE TAKEN ME WITH YOU!'' Louis had had enough. He started throwing everything he could get a sight of around in his room.

''STUPID FOR LEAVING ME ALONE. I'VE HAD ENOUGH!''

''DID YOU HEAR ME? I'VE HAD ENOUGH OF THIS SHIT!'' Louis was furious by now. He went to his bookcase and threw out all the books.

''I HATE MY LIFE!'' He screamed while tears was flowing down his face. ''I HATE EVERY SINGLE BIT OF IT!'' He continued.

''FUCKIG STUPID ASSHOLE!''

''SHOULD HAVE GONE WITH YOU IN THE CAR, WHY DID I WALK HOME ALONE WHEN I COULD HAVE BEEN WITH YOU?!'' Louis screamed. He then started looking around in the room and fell down to his knees. Tears streaming down his face and heavy breathing.

''Should have gone with you," he whispered into the bare air.

His heart was broken and he finally admitted it. ''I should have been with you," he finished.

He curled into a ball on the cold floor and laid there for what seemed to be an hour.

His life was more than shitty. He hated everyone and everything at the moment and he finally decided that it was time to commit the suicide.

Louis went to the bathroom and took out a little mug where he had put some sleeping pills in the night before.

He took the pills in his hand and filled the now empty mug with water and went back to his bedroom. He put the pills on his bed and grabbed his iPhone from the nightstand.

Louis opened his camera app and clicked on play. He then placed the iPhone on his nightstand again with the camera pointed towards himself.

This is it. There's no way out of it now, he thought.

''Hi Harry," Louis said while looking down on his hands and then up to the camera again.

''You probably wonder why I'm sending you this, but wait, you'll understand everything, just listen okay?'' He breathed out.

''You have no idea of how much pain you've caused me. I cry every night in hope of help, that someone could maybe help me out of this dark hole. . .'' Louis said and small whimpers left his body every now and then.

''But you know what? No one is there to hear my prayers, no one is there to support me or even ask me how my day was. No one is there to hold me when I'm falling apart, which is everyday. No one asks me if I'm okay, because no one cares about me," he took a deep breath and looked down to his sleeves before he then brought his gaze back to the camera.

''This is what makes me strong," he said and pulled up his sleeves on his shirt and sighed.

''I do this to myself everyday because everyone hates me. You hate me, society hates me, everyone at school hates me, but the worst part is, I hate myself more than anything." The tears was now streaming down his face like a small beautiful waterfall.

''I've done this to myself for seven months now. It actually helps for the moment, but the day after I can't help than to feel disgusted and disappointed in myself.'' Louis pulled down his sleeves again and dried a few tears.

''I've finally found the reasons why everyone hates me. I know I'm fat and believe me, I'm starving myself behind closed doors. I know I'm ugly but i honestly don't know what to do with that. I wish you could photoshop your own face, that'd be lovely," he smiled a bit at the last part and the continued.

''But the biggest reason why I'm hated by everyone is because I'm a fag. I'm a useless stupid fag," he emptied his whole heart to Harry in this video. It actually felt kind of good to just, tell everything to someone.

''You tell me everyday to just kill myself already and guess what? You've won. I'm going to attempt suicide and there's nothing anyone can do to stop me," he smiled at that, he was finally going to leave earth and live happy with his best friend Liam in the big beautiful white heaven.

''I've planned this for almost a week now. You'll finally get rid of me.'' Louis was happy because in less than thirty minutes he'd be dead.

''You don't understand how heartbreaking it is to see you everyday walking around with your perfect curls, cute little dimples and sexy torso. It breaks my heart that you are my bully. It breaks me because ever since I laid my first eyesight on you, I've been high over heels for you," he laughed a bit even though the tears was still leaving his ocean blue eyes.

''Yes Harry. I'm in love with you and I've been that in what seems to be forever," he smiled.

''And now I'm leaving earth, finally making your wish come true. Because this is what you want, what everyone want. What I want."

He took the pills in his hand and brought it up to his mouth, swallowing everything at the same time with a glass of water.

''Goodbye Harry," he said to him before he then went to his phone to send the video message. When that was done he laid down in his bed, sighing and finally drifting off to sleep, a sleep that would last forever.

•*•*• This is not the end okay? And sorry for taking so long to update, I really have no excuse other than it's a hard chapter to write and I have a lot of homework so yeah. •*•*•