Musings Of A Modern Muslimah

Weddings: Part 1

Most of you guys already know that I’m going to a wedding today (wooooooot!). If you know me, then you understand my obsession with weddings because I just love everything about them. Here’s the funny thing though; I’ve never been to one. This is going to be my first wedding. So guys I’m kind of nervous and a tad bit scared for the unexpected. I only know how my culture celebrates their weddings by the stories (and oh my were they awful stories). I’ll start this musing from a story that my cousin told me about a recent wedding she attended.

My cousin was invited to a wedding but she didn’t know the bride all that well (though her mother did). She was kind of scared to attend at first but then decided to just go with it anyways (cause c’mon free food! :D). She asked her mom several of times if there would be any men and her mother repeatedly told her no. Since her mom ensured the no men would be present, she wore the traditional diraac (which is like a dress which is kind of see through… ya I don’t like it either xD) and didn’t wear the hijab. She gets to the wedding and just like mom promised no men were present (or at least so she thought). 30 minutes in a group of men started entering and joining the ceremony. My cousin was having a mini panic attack and had to choose between covering her hair or covering her arms (she went with covering her hair). Thinking that the girls would scream and usher the men out, my cousin remained at her table as far away from these new couples as possible. You know what happened? The teenagers came together on the dance floor and began grinding (you read that correctly) to the latest hit songs. I almost died when I heard this. At first I didn’t believe it because in my head, hijabi’s would not even attempt that (even though they didn’t wear the hijab to the wedding, their still hijabi’s in my eyes) up until I saw the video and low and behold everyone was dancing all nasty on the dance floor. Since it’s my first wedding and all I don’t know what to expect, but if that happens you best believe I’m running for the door.

That’s not even the worst I’ve heard. Fights break out during weddings (like crazy fist fights) and a lot of people just go there to gossip about other people (like oh my god you guys, your at a wedding please be respectful).

It kind of makes me feel sad though. Marriage is supposed to be a blessing and the completion of half your deen so why would anyone decide on starting their marriage with the haram? I’ve read somewhere that those who start a marriage like this almost all the time end in divorce (not trying to scare you guys or anything, but I think I heard it from a tafseer).  I also wonder what the couple’s reaction towards their wedding day will be in about 5 years (just to see if they harbored any distaste towards their wedding ceremony).

Because it’s my first wedding and all, I decided not to get all glammed up. I’m wearing an abaya with a navy black blazer and a dark red hijab.... yup that’s it. Some of you are probably clicking your tongues at how crazy I might be for dressing so simply but I just don’t want to over glammed up (I don’t even wear make up and better understated than overstated right).

To add to my anxiety there is a 100 percent chance that my mom will ditch me to hang out with her friends (I swear she hates me xD). So I’ll be left all by my lonesome mingling with random people I don’t know and gorging on the buffet table (Ill bring my sister along so I’m not that alone!).

So I’m going into this wedding expecting the worst, but Inshallah I pray that it isn’t horrible. My sister has this belief that if I attended a wedding, ill hate weddings altogether (which I doubt will ever happen) and stop pestering my older siblings into marriage (which will never happen).  I’ll entertain this little idea till I see how this wedding is. I will also keep in mind that if this wedding ends up being crazy, I know that not all of them will be like it and so my wedding obsession will never die! Long live weddings XD!

So people, that was just a short musing on weddings, I’ll most likely do a part 2 (maybe Inshallah) to tell you guys how the wedding went (Inshallah it goes well) and possibly banter on about weddings. Oh and also, if you guys would like me to do a musing on a certain topic PM me! I’m all up for new ideas so don’t hesitate yall! You know the drill, comment and vote if you liked it :D