Heart of the Pack

Chapter 37 - Grief

The months had dragged by since the accident, there had been no change with my sister however she was stable. Today would be the first time that Paul had left her side for more than an hour in the last two months, I just wish it was under better circumstances , he would be leaving her side as it was Harry's funeral, his little body couldn't fight any longer and departed this world April 11th, 2011, he had a bleed on the brain. The loss of Harry hit Jacob and Paul hard, neither of them looked like themselves anymore, the only reason Jake was getting through losing his son was his two daughters and Jade. 

Emily had given birth to a little girl a month ago, Leila Grace Uley on March 12th she was tiny, other than that nothing else had changed, she had brought the pack a little joy, which we were all thankful for. There had been no leeches passing through, so we were letting the Cullen's patrol La Push for us today, so that everyone could attend the funeral, everyone but Mia.

We were gathered at Jacob's waiting for the hearse to arrive, we all were sat in silence not knowing what to say, moments later the hearse arrived, Harry's coffin was tiny, he shouldn't be in there and none of us should be stood at his funeral, he was too young to die. We followed the hearse as Harry made his last journey around La Push, Jake and Jade were in the front of the car, me, mom, Seth and Paul in the back, I kept hold of Paul's hand the whole journey there knowing he needed some sort of support, he loved Harry like his own son.

I was struggling to keep my emotions in check as Harry's coffin was taken from the car, realization hit that Harry wouldn't be coming back, he was gone, I wouldn't get to see his smiling face again. The tears were running down my face, Jake was inconsolable, he had lost his first born, his son. In a way I was glad Mia wasn't here, she wouldn't be able to cope with the funeral, she didn't even know he was gone yet, she wouldn't be able to cope with burying her son.

"Harry was an amazing little boy, he was loved by all his family and friends, his smile would light up anyone's day" Billy said about his grandson, I zoned out, allowing my mind to fill with the memories I had shared with my nephew; the first time I saw him in the Hospital to the nights he had sleepovers with me and Embry, he used to always want a hot chocolate with extra marshmallows, six extra to be precise, and then would always want me to read him a bedtime story about wolves and dragons. I would miss the days I shared with him but I knew I had to be thankful for the time I got with him.

The weather reflected everyone's mood, it was gloomy and grey, the rain falling down heavy, the air was stuffy, due to the amount of family and friends who had gathered to celebrate Harry's short life. He touched everyone here, we would always remember the short time we had with him before he was taken from us. In the council hall were rows of chairs filled with people consumed in grief, thankfully the casket displayed at the front of the chairs was closed, none of us could bear to look at Harry's face if he wasn't smiling at us. The casket spray was filled with blue flowers, his favorite color, two large candles were lit either side.

Jake and Paul took Harry's coffin out on their shoulders, Jake had decided he wanted Paul as a pallbearer seeing as he was like a second father to his son. We followed them out, tears flooding everyone's face. As the casket was lowered into the ground, many more tears were shed. Jacob was in bits, he had fallen to his knees in grief, he truly loved his son with everything he had. Everyone loved Harry no matter how much time they had spent with him, everyone loved him from the moment they met. Nobody spoke as we walked away from the now covered grave, Embry had his arm around my shoulder attempting to comfort me, but all I could think of was Mia. She had lost her only child, but she didn't even know he was gone, would she ever know he was gone?

We were having a gathering back at the Black's in order to celebrate Harry's little life, mom and Tiffany had prepared a buffet, condolences were passed around as an attempt to bring comfort to Harry's nearest, Jacob never responded he just sat staring into nothingness, we knew he needed time.

As I gazed around the room I realized Paul was missing, he mustn't have come back here as i hadn't seen him for a while. The only place i can think of him being is at Mia's bedside, a place he had permanently been beside for the last couple of months. "I'm going to head to the hospital Mom, Embry is going to come with me" I said to my mom as I gave her a hug, she nodded returning the hug before I turned to my grandmother hugging her also. I couldn't leave without speaking to Jake first so I headed over to him taking the vacant seat beside him before grabbing one of his hands, "Jake, I'm going to head to the hospital to check on Mia, Harry wouldn't want you to be upset, I know you can't help it he was your son after all, but just remember you aren't alone, you have Jade and the girls and you have the support of the pack if you ever need to talk or let off steam." I spoke softly to him, "can I come?" he asked quietly, it was that quiet I almost didn't hear him, I nodded knowing he needed to see her.

We left soon after, it didn't take long to get to the hospital or Mia's room, they had moved her after Harry had passed so then we wouldn't be reminded constantly that he wasn't beside her anymore. Paul was sat beside Mia holding her hand speaking to her wishing she would wake up, just as I had expected. Jake entered the room followed by myself then Embry. Jake took the seat on the opposite side of the bed to Paul, Embry stood behind Jake his hand on his shoulder whilst I sat on the bottom of the bed. Mia looked more like herself now that her cuts were healed, it was just a matter of her being strong enough to wake up now.

Paul excused himself to go the bathroom, Jake had hold of Mia's hand "Mia, I need you to wake up, we all need you to wake up. You'd know what to do right now. Paul needs you especially just please open your eyes" Jake cried, his tears falling onto her arm. The machines hooked up to her started beeping like crazy, before her hand twitched and her eyes flickered open.

"MIA!" I cried. 

Authors note = I struggled writing this chapter so much, i was debating wether to go with it and i was also struggling how to write what i wanted down.