Chapter 15: Natsu's Resolve

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Hidden Powers

[NaLu Fanfiction]

By: JeRein_14

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Chapter 15: Natsu's Resolve

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Natsu's POV

  It's been a month and a half since i last saw her. It's been that long since she left the guild without consulting anyone but Master. She left without a trace nor clues. It's like she vanished..

  It's only been a week since i started to open up to the guild again. For more than a month, i locked myself in my house. I wanted to be alone and think. I was beyond depressed. Guilt had completely consumed me. The scene at the lake happened almost three weeks ago. After that, Ice Princess and Erza never stopped annoying me. They would come to my house, uninvited if i may add, and tried to convince me to at least visit the guild. I was stubborn at first, snapping at them and telling them to leave me alone. That i need some more time to think.

  They would give me the space i needed but would come back the next day. I'm actually touched with the concern they are showing me but i don't need their pity right now. All I want is Lucy. My Lucy. She's the only one who can bring the old Natsu back.. Back then, when Gajeel told me that Lucy's inlove with me, i realized that i had messed up big time. That i had commited the biggest mistake in my life..

Breaking my mate's heart..

  When i first met her, i knew for a fact that's special. That she'll play an important role on my life. I just didn't realize that i'll be this attached to her. She's always been my light, my strength. Out of everyone, i feel the most protective over her. She comforts me in a way others can't whenever i'm sad. She inspires and supports me most out of everyone. And most importantly, she believes and trusts me. I don't know when or how, but i knew i was starting to fall inlove with her. The way i get easily get jealous when other guys come near her and how many times i catch myself thinking of her is more than enough proof i needed. She's my potential mate. And because of that, i got scared..

  I feel something for her that shouldn't be felt, especially since we're bestfriends. I had crossed the line. That's why i'm worried. Once she learned that she's my possible mate, she'll feel obligated to return my affections. She knew that we, dragonslayers, mate for life. Once we meet our other half, that's that. We won't love someone else. And what's worse, if we get rejected, we'll spend the rest of our life alone. And knowing Lucy, she won't let that happen. She's too nice for her own good.

  I never made a move on her. Aside from the whole-mates-thing, i don't want things to get awkward between us. I don't want us to change. As much as i want to kiss her so badly, i can't. I need to stop myself. She's too important to me. I don't want to lose her. I can't lose her. It will kill me..

  I don't know what came over me when i ignored her. When Lisanna returned, i felt something inside of me stir. Truth is, i used to like her. I had developed a small crush on her way back. But due to some circumstances, those feelings were long forgotten. I had moved on. But seeing her alive and breathing, my feelings for her suddenly came flooding in. I stayed by Lisanna's side to confirm these feelings. At first, i thought it was developing into love, but i was wrong. It turned out to be siblings love after all. I had enjoyed my time with her that i failed to notice that i was slowly drifting away from Lucy. I was selfish. I was too engrossed of worrying that i'll cause Lucy pain. And in the end, i had hurt her far more worse than i thought. I don't deserve to love her anymore.

  With the help of Ice Princess, Erza and Happy's constant begging and lecturing, i finally decided to show up at the guild. At first, i thought they would be mad at me. I thought they blame me for making Lucy leave. But i was dead wrong. The moment i stepped inside Fairy Tail, i was tackled by hugs and tears. Lisanna, Romeo, and Wendy declaired that it was them who had missed me most. During the cries and sniffles, Master had ordered me to come to his office. He said that he wanted to talk to me in private. I knew what was coming. I had a clue on what's  bothering him. I can still remember our conversation from way back then.

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