This Love is Ours

Chapter 61: Silence Screams

{Abigail}

The silence is almost unbearable.

All I can hear is the sound of Patrick's steady breathing coming from the driver's side.

His hands are clenched tightly on the steering wheel, and I watch him carefully from the passenger seat.

We drive back through Downtown Chicago, and despite the busy world around us, everything seems to be awfully quiet.

Patrick and I are driving home from my ultrasound, where we found out that we are going to be having twins.

Twins.

Two babies.

Not just one.

Two.

I'm pregnant with two babies.

And this changes everything.

Patrick and I don't even know what to say, hence the silence.

I think we are both in shock, to be honest.

Ever since I found out that I was pregnant, I've been envisioning just one baby.

Patrick and I being the parents to one baby.

Eventually, there may be more, but for now, that's all we were picturing.

This, however, has caused a change of plans.

The workload has been doubled.

I will now need to have a c-section, in order to give birth to the twins.

When Patrick is away for games, I'm going to have to look after two babies, rather than just one.

And not that I think having twins is a bad thing... it's just different.

So fucking different than I had imagined.

I think both Patrick and I are a little stunned, at the moment.

I mean... twins.

Wow.

And so as Patrick and I continue to drive through Downtown, and back towards Trump Tower, neither of us say a word.

I stare out the window, my eyes locked on the city as it passes by me, both of my hands resting on my small baby bump.

Everything makes so much sense now.

My baby bump is larger than the average baby bump is at this stage, simply because I'm carrying two babies rather than one.

Apparently what had happened, was last ultrasound, one of the twins was hiding behind the other one, which is why it looked like there was only one of them in there.

However this time, they had moved around enough so that we could see both babies.

And good God, could I ever see both of them.

There were clearly two of them.

And they are still the most beautiful things I have ever seen in my entire life.

Of course, I'm still beyond excited to have these two babies, but Christ, this changes so much.

I look over at Patrick, and his jaw is clenched.

He swallows hard, his eyes still locked on the road.

I move my gaze down to my belly, and can't help but smile.

I guess when Patrick is on the road, I'll have more than just one baby to keep me company.

I bite my lip, smiling at my lap.

Still, the quietness of the car overtakes both Patrick and I.

I've never heard a silence quite this loud.

After what feels like the longest fifteen minutes of my existence, Patrick and I finally reach Trump Tower, and Pat parks the car in the underground parking lot.

Patrick pulls the key out of the ignition, and quickly gets out of the car, closing the door behind him.

He doesn't look over at me, he just gets out of the car.

I sigh, getting out of the car as well.

Patrick and I begin walking across the cement floor of the parking lot, and towards the elevators.

I walk beside him, my eyes watching my feet take steps.

I don't even know what to say to Patrick.

And he clearly doesn't know what to say to me either.

Right then, I feel Patrick's hand take mine, gently.

I smile, still looking down, as he intertwines his fingers with mine.

And in this moment, I realize that everything is going to be okay.

It's just that right now, Patrick and I are both feeling a bit overwhelmed.

Patrick and I get into the elevator, and he presses floor eighty-four with the hand that's not holding mine.

We begin ascending, and eventually, we reach floor eighty-four.

The elevator doors slide open, and Patrick and I walk down the hallway to our apartment.

He unlocks the door, and both of us make our way inside the apartment, closing the door behind us.

After both of us take off our jackets and shoes, Patrick strolls through the apartment, and plops down on the couch.

I bite my lip, before making my way over to the couch, sitting down next to him.

He put his arm around me, and I cuddle into the nook of his shoulder.

And for a few minutes, we stay like that.

Not talking.

Not saying anything.

Just holding onto one another.

Holding onto another so calmly, despite the oceans that run wild within our minds.

And finally after a few minutes, he speaks.

"Twins." He says, a smile in his voice.

I bite my lip, nodding.

"Twins." I say back.

I hear him sigh, and my head moves up at the rising and falling of his chest.

"I guess this would explain a lot of things." Pat chuckles, placing one hand over my baby bump.

I nod, looking down at his large hand resting on my stomach.

"Yeah." I nod, quietly.

Patrick kisses me on the temple, and keeps his lips pressed against my skin for a few moments longer than usual.

Finally, I force myself to ask the question, I have been dying to ask.

"Are you upset, Patrick?" I ask, looking up at him.

His eyes are a simple shade of blue in this lighting, but at the same time they are complex.

Complex in many ways, I suppose you could say.

Like in the story they tell, or the emotions they elicit.

"You can be honest." I say, swallowing.

He smiles down at his lap, before looking back at me, shaking his head.

He's laughing now, too.

I smile, looking up at him.

"No Abigail, I'm not upset. Not at all." He says, smiling.

I laugh, kissing him on the cheek, feeling myself blush.

Patrick then speaks again.

"There is no reason for either of us to be even the slightest bit upset right now. Because Abigail, darling, we created two miracles, instead of just one."