Hell Is My Life

24. Hell is my Life

Chapter 24

When I woke up the next day, I was so depressed.  I felt guilty for doing that to Grant.  All that I could think about was that Ford has always mostly been a dick to me, and Grant has never treated me bad.  But I knew that I loved Ford, and I would never love Grant.

When Ford woke, all we did was talk.  He knew that something was wrong, and I told him I missed my mom, which was true, but it wasn’t the reason why I was sad at the moment.

So I told him everything major that had happened since I was 7.  He listened the whole time and didn’t interrupt me once.  Once I was done pouring my heart out to him, he told me his story.  

“It first happened on my dad’s birthday, because my mom was at work.  I was 7, and he raped and abused me, but I already told you all of that…  Anyways, after he raped me again for “being a bad boy”, I tried to tell my mom again.  I knew it was wrong for him to be doing that to me.  Once again, she told him, and I got “punished”.  Then I tried to tell a teacher.

“She told my mom, and my mom told my dad.  The next time mom was gone; she was gone from an entire month.  Every night of that month, dad would come into my room and rape me.  Evan never found out because he was out at a friends house most of the time.  When I got older, about… Oh, I don’t know, 13, or 14, I started sneaking out at night.  The next day when I went home, my dad would burn my back with a hot piece of metal.”  He took off his shirt and showed me all of the scars.  “My friends asked me about it when I was dressing out in P.E.  I didn’t know what to tell them, so I just lied and said that I fell into a creek and all of the rocks scratched me.  It was a bad lie, but they believed me.

“It went on for what seemed like forever.  It was like the only time I was safe was when my mom was home.  But as time went on, she was home less and less.  I only saw her about once every 5 months.  She was always gone.  She became an alcoholic.  So every time she was home, she was drunk and was passed out before 5 pm.  Then, about a year ago, Evan got a house, and I started living with him.  He still doesn’t know what happened to me. I don’t want him to find out either.  

“I haven’t been home ever since Evan got the house.  I was there once.  I was getting my things together to leave, and he tried to have sex with me.  I… I lost control and did the only thing I could think of doing; beating him.”  Ford was shaking so bad.  I wrapped my arms around him in comfort.  “After I did, I got my shit and ran.  That was the last time I saw him, and hopefully the last time I ever will.”

“I’m so sorry, Ford.”

“You need to call your mom.”

Right then, I didn’t even care that he had ignored my pity.  “And say what?”  I was so pissed off.  Did he not understand what my mom did?  He was about to answer when I interrupted him.  “That man beat my mom, and she still chose him over me!  What kind of mom does that?”  

“She wants to be loved, Tear Drop!”  

“Oh, what do you know?  You don’t know my mom!”  I yelled.

“Tear Drop, Baby, please don’t get mad.”  I instantly made myself calm down.

“Okay.  I’m sorry.”

“Please just call her.”  His sentence aroused my anger, and I was about to start yelling again.  “Stop.  I know what she did, and I understand that.  I understand why you’re mad.  But maybe you’re wrong.  Maybe you just misunderstood something.  Please just call her.”  He held out my phone to me.

Sighing, I snatched it from him.  Dialing my mom’s number, I glared at him.  

“Hello?”  She answered.