Alice;
Helena and Mike thought it would be a great idea for me to go on tour with them so I wouldn't be alone. I've been on tour for about a month or two so and that means it's been about four months, since Oliver had left.
He's gone.. I knew he'd have to go for tours. I know I made the right choice for him, but why does it hurt so much like daggers are being pushed in my eyes.
I don't remember a night that I didn't quietly cry myself to sleep, or not sleep. I don't remember the last time I didn't smoke a cigarette.
But I do remember it as if it was yesterday, and the saddest part was that it was on Skype. I had no choice too, but I couldn't stop thinking of the temptations of him or I cheating.
Nothing could explain the pain I felt. It seemed as if I was walking on air, and then someone comes from behind me and grabs a knife and stabs me from behind piercing my heart.
I tried so hard not to cry, I bit my lip so hard I could feel and taste the blood. He looked so hurt. He knew he had no choice to go because it was a once in a life time.
"I love you Oliver, but I think we shouldn't be together. Your going to find people on tour who are attractive to you, and who likes you. Your going to end up fucking with someone, and it's better that we break up so you don't do it behind my back." I told him, so calmly but I could feel slow soft tears fall from my eyes, as I closed them to speak.
I kept them closed as I finished. "I know you'll soon forget the color of my eyes, and I'll soon forget yours. You'll possibly forget my existence too, and don't say you won't because you will you'll find someone and she'll make you forget about me."
I opened my eyes, which felt like tons. My eyelashes were soaked from my tears, my cheeks had strokes of black due to my make up.
Oliver was speechless, all he did was nod and he said he had to on the stage. He didn't care to say he loved me one last time. He didn't even say it back.
I should be over him after it being four months, but he's the only relationship I've ever been in.
I believe Tony might have a thing for me. Every night Tony stays up with me making sure that I'm okay, and sometimes we'll end up sleeping together not sexual but comforting.
Like right now, him and I are smoking a cigarette outside the tour bus. I take out my phone. 1:17 a.m.
"How are you feeling?" He ask, catching my attention.
"Thinking." I sigh as I huff out smoke.
He puts his out, by dropping it and smashing his out. "Look I know, Alice. I know it's hard.. but after these past two months I've developed some feelings towards you."
I honestly don't know what or how to respond. Because yes I do have some feelings but I somehow feel like I'm with Oliver. Oddly.
"Alice... please say something." He says, softly.
"Tony.. I'm not going to lie. Yes I do have feelings for you.. but I feel like I'm dating Oliver still in a way." I tell him, smoking the last of my cigarette.
"Oh.. I understand." He mumbles.
I put out my cigarette, and step in front of him.
"But, I'd love to take chances with you, if you're up to it." I tell him.
He looks up smiling at me, smiling. He steps closer me grabbing my both of my hands with his.
"Well.. Alice, may I ask you to be mine?"
I nod. "I'd love too, Tony.. but please remember it's going to be a little hard on me."
"I know, Aly." He tells me as he kiss my cheek.
OMG I FINISHED A FUCKING BOOK!!! OML. YUSSSS.
Thank you for all of your support during this book.♡
i am going to be writing book2 so send me book covers for that book. Ill give you credit too btw c: <3
Omg i cant believe i finished the book.
