A Cup of Tee' and a lil' dash of honey

It's Such A Struggle.. Things I Can't Handle or Tolerate Anymore

It's so physically, mentally and emotionally draining being woke and realizing the sad and unjust circumstances that black people have to face day in a be day out just for being black.

I literally catch myself in tears sometimes thinking about all racism, discrimination, and just down right inhumane treatment black people receive. Not only that I have to worry and think about how sexist and misogynistic the world is as a woman I have to overcome those injustices as well as having to face the reality that I'm a black woman and when it comes to gaining respect and the treatment any human deserves I will always be last on the long list of categories of people.

I remember around the time I had just got out of high school, I legit had no idea of all the ways black people had been oppressed since our ancestors were forced from their homes and taken half way across the world to be treated like animals. Notice I said didn't say since before segregation or only during slavery times but the whole history of African Americans starting from the first man/woman who were stolen and sold like a piece of cattle or property instead of human beings and bought here.

If anyone hasn't been paying attention, I feel bad for you and I encourage you to turn on the news and see that those marches for equality, protests for fair treatment, and mourning over numerous black bodies their killers never get charged, convicted, or face any consequences for that was a merely a brief paragraph in your history book is very much still reality.

The total of black bodies that are continously being slain in cold blood are sickening and the most terrifying part about it is that the people who are supposed to serve & protect the public are ones killing all of these black kings & queens. The hashtags keep coming and for us black people who are paying attention the mourning process never stops, it's just an endless cycle of pain, wanting to know why, and anger cause no one else seems to see the problem that can so easily be seen.

Now that I'm woke and recognize the cruel reality that is this society we live in, it's so hard to not see and call out the disregard, disrespect, discrimination against black people and cultural appropriation of black culture.
Like yall this post was inspired by the fact that I had found this new book that seemed super promising and I was excited to read it and see what was going on, I was half way into the first chapter feeling the main character and thinking I'm about to love the sh*t out of this book because the writing appears to be A1 plus the storyline was mad different. All that came to screeching halt the moment a pale (not me being funny that's the description of the boy) teenage boy enters with "dreadlocks" *rolls eyes*

I read on trying to ignore it but didn't get down another paragraph because I couldn't disregard the fact that this white boy who was gonna also be a main character had "dreads" I deleted the book out of my library and kept it moving to never look back.

I just couldn't do it because if I continued I was gonna say something then the fifty eleven followers the author has cause it's a popular book would have tried to defend the placement & I didn't have the time or the patience that day to deal with that bullsh*t. So I peacefully bowed out with the new urge to just stay my ass in the urban lit so I won't have to deal with white characters having dreadlocks cause they wanna express how different & hipsterish they are and everyone loves it and thinks it's cool.

Meanwhile if I write slang in my book because that's how people in the setting of my work talk, I have people in my inbox telling me that my characters talk ghetto and that my story's dialogue isn't realistic.. yeah this happens lol but I never say anything about it.

Basically most of the books I read in high school and that were in my school library were based around and only had white characters but I went to an almost all black/Hispanic high school. Yall there was two white kids in my graduating class out of almost 130 seniors. The fact didn't use to bother me because that's just the way things were and I wasn't aware of why nor was a enlightened as much as I am now.

But now that i know I'm mad that all of these outlets refuse to allow POC representation to be as widely spread as these stories that have white main characters. Don't try me with the bullsh*t that black kids or people don't read as much because all of these stories on Wattpad say differently.

I'm mad as hell at the fact Wattpad still doesn't have an Urban genre but there's plenty of urban books on here that are over a million reads so we all can see that the genre is well represented and popularized.

I'm mad that Amazon doesn't have a subcategory for African American teen/new adult categorized stories and even if you go through Literature & Fiction, click into the African American section the only other subcategories you will see are Urban, Historical, Christian, Romance, Mystery/Thriller, and Woman's Fiction. Yeah I know cause I frequent the site and the Kindle book store to know the categories off hand lmao. I love both sites but where are the teen/ new adult books and urban actually have black or other people of color as the central focus.

These stories are just as important as any werewolf, supernatural, ceo, billinaire secret baby, fanfiction etc so they deserved their own spot to shine. They don't deserve to just be sitting in the middle of a scrambled other genre because no one will give its own place that it deserves.

I wrote all of this randomness lol to say that I can't tolerate stories that I used to enjoy anymore because if I find something offensive, disrespectful and feel like the book contains a form of cultural appropriation I will give up on the story and lose all interest. And I'm glad as sh*t that I will, being woke may have its struggles but I'll take this over being ignorant to the bullsh*t the world tries to brainwash black people into believing any day.