bts scenarios

BTS Cooking

Jin: alright children gather around lets make dinner

Suga: cant u do it urself

Jin: dont u think its time u actually do something rather than rot in the corner of this house

Suga: i contribute the most to bangtan i handle the swag u dont know what ure talking about

Rapmon: behave my son behave

Jin: k anyways im gonna teach u all some tips and tricks on cooking today since u all are basically useless to the group

Suga: I handle the-

Rapmon: behave

Jin: ok so- PARK JIMIN WHAT THE FLYING FUCK ARE YOU DOING

Jimin: uh drinking milk????

Jin: do u mind telling me what color is that straw ure using

Jimin: green???

Jin: confucius says to always use a red straw when drinking milk go to church this sunday jimin you have sinned

Jimin: but i like green-

Jin: no

Suga: yall are just wasting my time here can we get to the point

Jin: alright lets start cooking jungkook dice the onions taehyung chop the carrots jimin pls use a red straw ok whos next hoseok look into my drawers beside my bed for that butcher knife and namjoonie get the chicken meat out the freezer we’re making stew

Suga: what about me

Jin: u my slave massage my shoulders

Suga: ure asking for a punch here-

Rapmon: pls behave young warrior

J-Hope: *comes back with a butcher knife bigger than bang pd’s belly*

J-Hope: jin why the fuck do u have a butcher knife in ur drawer

Jin: oH i bought it yesterday at the professional cooking care section because i thought that it would be nice to throw it at namjoon whenever he snores

J-Hope: amazing

Rapmon: excuse

Jin: u may excuse urself

Jin: hoseok go find the pasta

J-Hope: is there even pasta in stew

Jin: stfu always trust oppa now go

V: jeon jungkook ure dicing the onions wrongly!1!11

Jungkook: wtf am i doing wrong

V: always chop it horizontally before chopping it vertically where the fuck are u from? narnia?

Jin: taehyung is now promoted to assistant chef of bangtan *reaches in for a hand shake*

V: get ur hands off me dont touch what u cant afford

Jimin: i got a red straw is there anything i can do now

Jin: ah yes go help namjoon find the meat hes taking so long wow

Jin: always pay attention to what ure doin cus u dont wanna hurt urself i dont want ur parents to sue me

Jin: jungkook are u writing a trilogy or giving birth to twins whats taking u so long

Jungkook: taehyung told me to get a new onion to dice cus i diced it wrongly

Jin: #ok

V: im done with the carrots

Jin: *pulls out a measuring tape* good work kid get some rest while i measure each carrots diameter to make sure its perfect

Jimin: we’re back with the meat sorry jin namjoon fell into the freezer cus his sunglasses are giving him temporary blindness and i had to pull him out

Rapmon: wat

Jin: wat

BTS: wat

Jin: its ok namjoon please turn on the stove

Rapmon: on it

Rapmon: *reaches for the stove*

BTS: nO WAIT NAMJOON-

*the entire house blows up fireworks start to ignite and the angel choir starts singing suga comes back with new boots and oh ya and hoseok starts crying*

BTS:

Jin: take out anyone?