The New Romantics

Chapter Seven: Picture To Burn

He decided to stay.

I staggered back a bit. Literally taken aback. 

He said he planned on getting me back, even if it meant near death by Benjamin and Alex. He said he was ready to fight. I just about smacked him again. He was an idiot! A delusional, self-centered, idiot!

Benjamin held me steady and we (plus Alex) walked to the other side of the room.

Alex had his arms crossed and was tapping his foot. He was totally prepared for the fight. I crossed my arms also and chewed on my thumbnail in anxiousness. I looked behind me at Branden- he had a bloody nose, a busted lip, and a bruising eye. He wasn't going to be his pretty little self anytime soon.

"What did he do to you?" I don't know who asked the question, but it completely threw me off.

"I'm sorry, what?" I looked back from Branden at the other two in a delayed response to the question.

"What did he do to you?" Benjamin asked again, anger and annoyance evident in his voice. Alex glared at him, probably hating the fact he was speaking. Benjamin ignored him and continued. "You kept saying he used you, and once you claimed he threw you out. And the sarcasm oozing from your speech? You only use that with people you hate. So, what did he do?" His voice lost it's anger and was replaced with- I don't know how to explain what it was replaced with. It was sort of a mixture of longing and worry and tenderness and sympathy and confusion.

Alex gave me a look that implied he was wanting to know the same thing. I guess I never told him what happened either. I looked at both of them and sighed. I really didn't want to tell this story, but I could tell they weren't going to leave me alone about it.

I sat down on a conveniently placed, nearby chair and started my backstory, being extra careful not to make eye contact with them.

"When I was on that trip around Europe, I was only suppose to be gone a month, not three." I knew Benjamin didn't know what I was talking about, but Alex did, and his face told me he really didn't like what I said. "The other two months I spent with Branden. He had stopped by in...Spain? I believe it was Spain." Not that it really mattered, but details are rather important to me. "I hadn't seen him in almost a year, so I decided to stay with him.

"After about a month of being with him, I stared getting bored. The adventuring and stuff was fun and all, but it got old pretty quickly." I crossed my legs, feeling awkward with everyone listening to me. "I started going to parties. Drinking. Meeting guys. Same stuffed I was doing a few months ago. I always came home when the guy fell asleep and I was still drunk. I'm pretty sure Branden started to notice the pattern. Instead of getting mad, like a normal boyfriend would, he decided he could use me to his advantage. "

I felt like an idiot saying this out loud. I also felt very uncomfortable. I hadn't told Alex about any of this, or- like I said a while back- Benjamin. I hold told Martha and Parker- two of my best friends- but not the two most important guys in my life. They both looked hurt by this- that it took me over a year to tell them quite possibly the most life changing event in my life.

I took a shaky breath and attempted to proceed in my story. "He had three of his friends over one night when I came home. I went straight to bed, not really caring about his friends. He always had people over, and he always made sure they never talked to me. I don't know exactly what happened after that, until I...uh, until- I..." I couldn't seem to form sufficient words for what had happened next. I started tearing up, and immediately hated myself. I hated crying, especially in the middle of a speech. Benjamin tried to comfort me, but I waved him off. Normally, Alex would have enjoyed seeing me reject Benjamin, but his expression didn't change from what looked like worry and hatred.

After a minute, I was able to pull myself back together and finish telling what happened. I told them I woke up what I presumed was a little after the first guy had stripped me. I told them how I had to stay through the other two guys and Branden- that I couldn't leave, otherwise I'd have to find my way back home on my own. "I ended up having to find my own way home anyway. He had my stuff packed by the time I woke up. All of it, ready by the door. He told me he kept me around for the sex, and he knew I wouldn't do what he wanted after the previous night, so he was throwing me out." I was crying harder now, but it wasn't affecting my speech pattern. Thank goodness.

"I ended up at Baker Street a couple days later. Dad was gone again, but I didn't seem to care." He was a grown man. He didn't need a little eighteen year old girl taking care of him. "About a week later, I had attempted suicide." Branden had taken away all self worth I had left, and replaced it with nothing. I felt totally used- which I was- to the point where I felt useless. I couldn't handle the feeling- especially that day, after arguing with Alex, so I tried ending my life. Obviously, it didn't work.

"So... yeah. That's what he did." I always ended speeches so awkwardly while I was in school, and apparently that hasn't changed.