Damned If I Do

Chapter 5

Everyone is already gathered at the dining room table by the time I'm done getting ready. I wear something like this:

All eyes immediately turn to me as I walk into the dining room. "Lexi, sweetheart, come join us. Our first family dinner." Ward sounds so excited as he speaks. The only empty seat at the table is next to Sarah, but directly across from Rafe. Fuck. I take my seat and try to join in on the conversation. I can feel Rafe's eyes on me, my skin burns under his stare. I see him, out of my peripheral, glance down at my tits and bite his lower lip. Our eyes lock and I shoot him a sexy grin. He gives me a mischievous grin in return before quickly breaking eye contact.

"Would anyone like some wine?" My mother asks just as dinner is being served. "I would." Wheezie responds and Ward nearly spits out his drink. "Absolutely not, Wheez." He gives her a knock-it-off look. "I meant the older kids." My mom responds giving Wheezie a soft smile. Wheezie crosses her arms with frustration and begins to pout. "I'll take some, thank you." Sarah smiles as he raises her glass in her father's direction. "Rafe? Alexis?" Ward asks as he begins to pour some red whine. "Sure." Rafe says while looking at me. I can't read his expression right now and it's kind of pissing me off, yet, kind of turning me on. "Yes, please." I smile at Ward. We eat our meal in peace with minor conversation about everyone's day.

After we're all done, Sarah and Wheezie ask to be excused. Just as I'm about to ask if I can be excused from the table as well, Ward starts talking. "So, Lex, your mother and I have been talking." He starts off and I already know everything he's about to say is going to be bullshit. Ward and I used to be really close until he proposed to my mom about a year ago. Thats when the dynamic completely changed, I think it's because he'll have more of an influence on my mother's decisions and he absolutely hates pogues. So I know I am screwed.

Ward clears his throat before turning his attention to Rafe. "You're excused, son." Rafe pulls his eyes off me and looks at his dad with fury, before slamming his hands down on the table and making his way upstairs. "Sweetheart, we want to set some new ground rules. The biggest being no more hanging out with those boys." My mother warns with disgust in her words. "That's not going to happen." I defend. "Yes, it is, Alexis. We've talked to Mike and Anna and they're having the same conversation with Kiara as we speak." Ward cuts in.

I look between the two of them staring back at me with expressions that say they mean business. Right as Ward opens his mouth to begin speaking again, I burst out into laughter. "You've got to be kidding." I laugh while pointing between the two of them. "You can still see Kiara, but you are forbidden from going to The Cut. No more pogues. That's all we are asking of you." My mom speaks firmly. Ward throws a pamphlet of some soft down on the table in front of me. I pick it up, quickly reading it over. "Kitty Hawk? What the fuck is this?" I snap. "This is our last resort if you don't follow our rules. Your choice, baby." My mom frowns.

"This is such bullshit. You can't expect me to change my entire life or you'll send me away!" I shout as I stand up from the table. "Actually, yes we can!" Ward raises his voice to me. "We just want what's best for you, Princess." My mom speaks softly. "No, you fucking don't! You just want to control me. You want me to be this perfect kook and guess what? I'm not! I'm a pogue!" I scream at the top of my lungs, my throat is burning with each word. "Alexis Nicole, you're a kook and will live as such. End of discussion." My mother says as tears form in my eyes. Fuck this. I flip my plate of food and make my way up to my room.

•

RAFE'S POV
I lean against the wall by the stairs, listening to the conversation below. I have no sympathy for Lexi, honestly. She shouldn't be hanging out with those losers. She's a kook, always has been, but even more so now. The thought of JJ and John B touching her infuriates me. I want to kill them. Allie makes her way to the top of the stairs and she's met with me giving her a shit-eating grin. "Were you eavesdropping?" She accuses. "Of course not." I let out a low chuckle. "Fuck off, Rafe. I'm not in the mood." She brushes past me. Reaching out, I grab her arm and turn her around to face me with force. She looks up at me, with those beautiful green eyes, as she tries to wiggle out of my grip. "We just want what's best for you, Princess." I mock. "Why do you have to pick right now to be a jackass?" I can tell she's fighting back tears.

My heart aches for a moment. She's usually so strong and confident. This is a completely different side of her, and for some reason it turns me the fuck on. "Lexi." I let out a deep growl as I back her against the wall. She continues to fight her way out of my grip. "Rafe, please." She begs as the tears begin to fall as she gives me a doe-eye expression. I drop my hands and back away, letting her run past me to her room. Her tear strained cheeks, the look of pain and fear on her face when she looked at me.. I can't get those images out of my head. I actually feel bad for the girl now. I don't know if I want her to hate me anymore. She's going to be living here, I'm going to see her all the time. In all her sexy, little outfits. Fuck, I'm getting hard just thinking about it.

I want to be her safe zone. I want her to be mine, but I don't want her hanging out with those pogues. I've gotta shake this feeling. She's a whore, she's no good, right? I pull my phone out and shoot a text to that waitress from The Wreck, Sofia. Her and I have hooked up a few times, but honestly she's not really my type. She's just the only girl I've found thus far that lets me get off without worrying about her needs in return, because face it I don't care. I'm not looking for anything serious right now, at least not with her. I mean, she's clingy as hell, but I can treat her like shit and she'll constantly still be at my beck and call.

RAFE: You busy?
SOFIA: Leaving work now.
RAFE: I'll be over in twenty, gotta stop for whiskey.

I don't wait for her response before I put my phone in my back pocket and make my way to my truck.

LEXI'S POV
Rafe Cameron is by far the biggest asshole I have ever met. I hate him. I slam my door and lock it before throwing myself onto my bed as I begin to sob harder. There's only one thing I can think to do, so I pull my phone out and send a group text to the pogues.

LEXI: I need you guys. Shit hit the fan. They don't want me hanging out with you guys anymore.
JOHNB: LOL, that's a good one, Lex.
JJ: That's not happening, Cupcake ;)
POPE: Are you okay?
LEXI: Anybody hear from Kie?
KIARA: I'm here, just got the same shit talk.

We text for about an hour nonstop and I explain everything to my friends. They're just as pissed off as I am, rightfully so. I send JJ and John B some private texts as well. We make a pact that I can hookup with both of them and they won't see anyone else. They never said I couldn't hook up with anyone else. I rollover onto my back and stare up at the ceiling. My mind starts racing from the threesome, to that kiss with Chase, and then to Rafe. It's like no matter how hard I try to hate him I don't think I ever  truly could. He's the most beautiful man I've ever seen. I wonder what it would be like to be his, to have him wholeheartedly. I spread my legs, slowly slipping my hand down my panties. I rub my clit in a circular motion before slipping two perfectly manicured fingers inside my pussy. Losing myself at the thought of what it would be like if Rafe ever touched me.

Another text comes from someone not in my contacts.

UNKNOWN: Are you going to Midsummers?
LEXI: Who is this?
UNKNOWN: Can't say, Princess.

I don't respond.

UNKNOWN: I'm sorry about tonight. You looked so fucking hot in that red dress at dinner. You have the most amazing tits.
LEXI: RAFE? You're disgusting.
RAFE: Nah, just drunk. But you really are so fucking sexy, Lexi. You drive me crazy.

I don't respond, again.

RAFE: Look, I'm sorry I'm an ass. Meet me at midnight the night of midsummers back at the house. I want to talk to you.

I feel a knot in my stomach and a heartbeat in my pussy. I slowly feel myself becoming wet again. Drunk words are sober thoughts, he thinks I'm sexy? There's no way. He's messing with me. I've gotta beat him to the punch. Game on, Cameron.