THIRTY FOUR

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CHAPTER THIRTY FOUR
people pain

     THE LUMP IN HER THROAT was heavy with pain and sorrow

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     THE LUMP IN HER THROAT was heavy with pain and sorrow. Deaths in Hearts games appeared more cruel every time Kaori would witness them. They depicted utter despair, often displayed through selfish actions, impulsive decisions caused by fear and, lastly, surrender.

Sitting by the table that carried the ghosts of all the players who had been fooled by the game, Kaori wondered how she hadn't lost her mind just yet. Was she used to disappoint and hear the cruel words of her father so much that seeing humans tearing each other apart was not surprising?

Well, it had definitely built a big part of her personality. All the hours spent in his office or sitting on the couch, in the living room, forced to listen to his words about how she had to come back to the real world, that creating stories would never build her a fulfilling life.

Oh, how she had cried and cried and cried. In front of his deadly stare, in her mother's arms, on Asuka's shoulders, under her bedsheets in the middle of the night. How she had hated herself, so much that nothing was appealing anymore.

Chishiya sitting down next to her pulled her out of her thoughts.

She knew a cloud of sadness was contorting her face and she slightly turned to the side to make sure he wouldn't have to watch the emotions on her face. Emotions may look ugly to him and she didn't want to see a distasteful glare thrown her way.

A ruffling sound could be heard, followed by a soft crack and she lowered her gaze to see Chishiya extending a Kitkat bar towards her. The second piece was in his other hand before he took a bite.

She accepted the treat and took a bite herself, only to grimace at the way even sugar could taste like bitterness at this instant.

Eventually, she looked over at the man sitting next to her, "You know... sometimes I envy you, Chishiya."

"Why is that?" he asked, a glimpse of curiosity laced in his voice.

"You never seem phased by people's pain," Kaori said. "I wish I could be like that."

Chishiya didn't know what to answer to such a statement. Coming out of someone else's mouth, it would have sounded like an insult and Chishiya would have snickered and moved on. He knew he was insensitive, a reminder wouldn't be the trigger that would lead to change.

But Kaori had just said it in a completely different way. There was no judgment, nor disgust, in her tone. It had sounded desirous and filled with honesty.

"You can watch people die and go back to eating your cookies without a care in the world," the brunette pointed out. "That's... weirdly something I admire."

How uncanny was it for a man like Chishiya to be short of words. He watched the girl silently preparing herself another coffee and smiled to himself at the thought.

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