EXCHANGE OF HEARTS [BL]

KABANATA 15

Race was fully healed. He can now move his shoulder without feeling the pain.

He's healed but his father—Isaiah was still worried for him. Kahit na hindi pinapakita ng ama niya na nag-aalala ito para sa kalagayan niya ay nararamdaman pa rin ni Race ito.

Because of that shooting incident, hindi na mapakali ang ama niya, well except na lang kay Hades na kalmado lang pero si Isaiah ay grabe ito kung mag-alala. Hindi man sabihin ni Isaiah kay Race pero alam niya na naghired ito ng mga bodyguard para bantayan siya kahit saan siya magpunta.

He can see it everywhere, kahit saan siya lumilingon ay may napapansin siyang mga taong tahimik na nagmamasid sa kaniya.

He can't blame his father since that incident was very traumatizing. Pagkalabas pa nga ni Race sa hospital ay kahit siya hindi mapakali dahil baka may babaril na naman sa kaniya. Natakot din si Race na lumabas ng bahay nila dahil baka maulit ang nangyari noong sabado sa mansion ng mga Russo.

But days passed nawala na rin ang takot ni Race. Wala naman nangyari sa kaniya sa loob ng walong araw. Hanggang ngayon ay wala pa namang nagtatangka sa buhay niya and Race thought that maybe that he's not the target of that shooting. Iniisip niya na baka hindi talaga siya ang pinunterya noong sabado at nadamay lang o napagkamalan lang siya.

Eight days passed but still he didn't heard any word from Atlas, hindi rin ito pumasok. Hindi nagparamdam si Atlas sa kaniya hanggang ngayon, even his shadow didn't showed up.

He's worried. Race is worried for Atlas, their last interaction was when Atlas visited him in the hospital with his friends and until now Atlas never showed up, nor a text he receive none.

Nag-aalala siya kay Atlas dahil napansin niya na parang may tinatago si Atlas sa kaniya. Napansin ni Race ito noong dumalaw si Atlas sa hospital. Parang may hindi sinasabi si Atlas sa kaniya lalo na noong tinapik niya ang likoran ni Atlas at napangiwi ito. Race knew that something is off, na may tinatago si Atlas sa kaniya.

Walong araw na ring naghihintay ng text o tawag si Race galing kay Atlas. Mahirap man para sa kaniya na umamin pero namiss na niya si Atlas.

Para siyang tanga.

Kung nandito si Atlas ay itataboy naman niya palayo sa kaniya dahil ayaw niyang maramdaman ang kakaibang pakiramdam sa tuwing malapit si Atlas sa kaniya. He felt strange when Atlas is near at ayaw niyang maramdaman 'yon dahil hindi niya maipaliwanag kung ano 'yon.

Tapos ngayon na wala si Atlas ay hinahanap naman niya ang presensya nito. Sa tuwing pumapasok din siya sa eskwelahan ay nakikita na lang ni Race ang kaniyang sarili na naghahanap kay Atlas at umaasang naghihintay si Atlas sa kaniya sa gate para salubongin siya at inisin na naman siya.

Talagang baliw na siya.

Naglalakad si Race papunta sa sunod niyang klase nang biglang tumunog ang cellphone niya.

He stopped and immediately grab his phone from his pocket. Suddenly his heart skipped fast when he saw Atlas's name in his screen.

He take a deep breathe and squeeze his eyes shut. He can't believed this! Nakaramdam kaagad siya ng excitement ng mabasa ang pangalan ni Atlas sa screen ng cellphone niya. He tried to calm down but he can't, nanatili pa rin ang kaba at saya sa puso niya.

Nanginginig ang kamay niya nang basahin niya ang text ni Atlas.

Atlas: hey, how are you doing?

His phone beeped again.

Atlas: Jesus. I know this is crazy and not so fucking me but fucckk Race! I really miss you, okay?

Natulala si Race sa kaniyang cellphone. He becomes deaf, he didn't hear anything but his heart pounding fast and loud inside his ear. Pakiramdam niya ay may tumama bigla sa puso niya nang mabasa ang text ni Atlas.

Hindi kaagad naka sagot si Race. Hindi niya rin alam kung ano ang isasagot niya sa text ni Atlas.

He saw three gray dot in his screen, meaning Atlas is tying something.

He waited and waited and waited.

But the dot disappear.

Kumunot ang noo ni Race habang nakatitig sa cellphone niya. Naghintay ulit siya na sa susunod na text ni Atlas pero wala na. Wala na siyang natanggap pa.

“What the fuck?” He hissed and found himself calling Atlas.

In just a three ring, Atlas answered the phone.

“I assume that you missed me too,” Atlas chuckled.

Kumunot lalo ang noo ni Race ng marinig ang malalakas na mga hiyawan sa kabilang linya.

Where the fuck is he?

“Hey! Please, talk...” Atlas added.

Huminga ng malalim si Race, lumingon siya sa paligid pagkatapos ay tumitig sa pintuan ng room kung saan dapat ay papasok siya.

He turn his back at pumunta sa upuan na nasa ilalim ng malaking puno. He can't believe that he just ditched his class.

“Where are you?” He asked Atlas.

“At The Club!” Atlas shouted.

Umingay lalo ang kabilang linya.

“Umaga pa, ah,”

“They are open 7/19.”

“What are you doing there? Are you supposed to go to school?” Now, he sounded like his father.

“Ah, my Race miss me,”

Shit.

He immediately rubbed his chest when he felt like something hit his heart.

“Race?”

He cleared his throat. “Yeah?”

“Hurace is your name right?”

How? How did he know?

“Yeah...”

Tumahimik si Atlas sa kabilang linya pero naririnig pa rin niya ang malakas na hiyawan at tugtug sa kabilang linya.

“I have something to tell you,” a pause. “I think I am crazy.” Atlas laugh and Race just listen.

“Jesus! I just want this out in my heart, okay? I just don't like this feeling and it's very strange to me, Race. In the passed eight days I just fucking felt this all of the sudden and I don't know how to remove this is my fucking heart.”

Huminga ng malalim si Atlas. He comb his hair with his callous hand.

“Are you drunk?”

I know Atlas is crazy but the Atlas that I am talking with now feels like it's not him.

“I drink but not drunk,” he giggled. “Hey, listen to me first okay?”

“Hmm,”

“Hmm,” Atlas mocked him and chuckled.

He's really drunk.

“Anyways, I know this is really crazy and I know that this is so sudden. I really missed you, Race,” he goes on. “Crazy right? Yeah, I know. I feel like I am a fucking gay, geez.” Tumawa si Atlas sa sarili niyang sinabi.

“I really missed you, this past fee days that I didn't saw you I think I really suffer. Yeah, I know it's cheesy and God I am very cringe. But, can you blame me for missing you? I miss your smell, your laugh, your eyes, I miss everything about you.”

God. This is too much.

Mariing pinikit ni Race ang kaniyang mata habang nakikinig sa mga sinasabi ni Atlas. Sumandal siya sa likod ng bench and he swallowed hard.

“God, thanks! I didn't feel heavy now,” Atlas laugh. “You know what? I felt something heavy in my heart but when I told you everything I felt light, parang nawala 'yong mabigat sa puso ko dahil nasabi ko na sa'yo ang matagal ko nang gustong sabihin. Pero hindi lang 'yan ang gusto kong sabihin, Race. May natira pa pero sa susunod ko na lang sasabihin.”

Kinagat ni Race ang kaniyang labi. He likes what he feel right now. Parang may kumikiliti sa kaniya at hindi niya mapigilang mapangiti dahil sa lahat ng mga sinabi ni Atlas sa kaniya.

If someone saw him right now, they'll think that he is crazy because he is smiling alone. Smiling like a crazy and in love.

Wait. In love? No, no, no, no!

In love? No! I am not in love, I am just happy. That's all.

“Uh, I think I said it all? Again, I miss you. Fuck, this is so gay and I am not gay! Shit. Bye, Race.

“Atlas—”

Pinatay na ni Atlas ang tawag.

Napatitig na lang si Race sa kaniyang cellphone.

“He hanged up.” He said to himself.

He stood up and grabbed his bag. Imbis na dumiretso sa susunod niyang klase ay ibang direksyon ang tinahak niya. Palabas siya sa gate ngayon at hindi niya alam kung bakit. Never in his life na lumiban siya sa klase, pero ngayon dahil lang sa na curious siya sa ano pang sasabihin ni Atlas sa kaniya ay lumiban siya sa klase para lang puntahan si Atlas.

Gusto niyang marinig ang gusto pang sabihin ni Atlas sa kaniya. Gusto niya itong marinig sa personal. He admitted that it feels good nang sinabihan siya ni Atlas na na miss siya nito.

Mabilis siyang pumara ng taxi at nagpahatid sa the Club kung nasaan si Atlas ngayon. It's early in the morning and Atlas is drinking alcohol.