even more~Tom and Bill Kaulitz

out

Tom has been out of the hospital for a couple days now, were back at home and I've been with my brother and family for a while now, just becuase I was away for a while. Ollie now has a girlfriend that I've become pretty good friends with, not the type of friend that you would hang out with but a friend as in we get along and when she's over we can have chats without thing being awkward.

Tom has a small scar on his abs but it's no problem, I think it's pretty.

He also hasn't been so good lately, not sneaking over with Bill, or texting me.
Bill says that he's not talking to the band or him either, just laying in bed, sleeping or staring at the ceiling, not doing anything.

When he's forced to do something he's said to be acting fine, with a smile, but Bill knows its not real, both of then are too close to hide things from each other. And I know Bill knows something he just won't tell me.

Bills pov

I haven't taken Tom to a therapist yet, I thought maybe the reason he was so sad was becuase he was so drained and tired and his brain was separated from people, and just didn't feel good. But he's finished his meds and still is sooo sad.

Just staying in bed, he doesn't even occupy himself by watching TV, he just lays there.

Not only that sometimes when I walk past his room and his door is cracked open I can hear him crying. Something going on, it's not usual for him to cry for no reason.

I'll book an appointment for him to go to in about two days. In that time I'll get him out, get him to have some fun, with me and becca. We'll take her on a date and take her to mini golf, the new place in town, maybe then he'll smile genuinely, then we can take him to his favourite restaurant, with becca.

It's more like I'm taking them on a date honestly, but that's okay. I just need Tom to actually feel happy, even if it's just for a couple minutes.

...

As I'm sat in my bed I call becca.

_

Me: We're taking Tom on a date
Rebecca: sure when?
Me: tonight. I need to get him out of bed, get him to have some fun and smile, he hasn't seen you in a while, maybe that's why?
Rebecca: yeah sure I'll pick you two up, I've been wanting to see you two, especially him, I need to talk to him, let him get some thing off his chest yknow.
Me: I don't know, dove. He's only ever opened up to me, I don't know what you'll get out of him
Rebecca: yeah and I can't get anything out of you so it's what I've come to.
Me: okay bye, dove see you soon, I'll get him in the shower. Love you.
Rebecca: bye baby, i love you too.
_

We hung up the call, I jumped up from my bed, making my way to Tom's.

Toms POV

That whole day I've been thinking, I. Going to do it tonight, I'll end it, I have some beads in my razorsi can use, then it'll all be over, I can't take this pain any longer, I just have to end it, tonight, as soon as possible.

Bill came into my room, holding a towel.

"Come on, get up your having a shower, we have a date tonight with Rebecca, amd I can't have you being stinky and sweaty, so get up." He says, comeing over to me.

"Why would you make plans, I'm tired" I groan

"Tom how are you still tired, you have been sleeping for days on end."

"I don't know, just cancel the plans, say I'm sick or something."

"No Tom this is Rebecca we are talking about, I don't know how you could be this tired, to the fact you don't even want to see her. Now get up, I don't care if I have to make you stand up, I will." He says ripping my blanket off me revealing me just in my boxers.