i want you hyunjin || hyunlix

fauna and flora

- hyunjin -

once seungmin and jeongin leave, i slip my hand into felix's and he turns to look at me, a smile spreading across his face. warmth travels through my body as if i stepped into a pool of sunshine.

"you did a good job," i compliment, giving his hand a squeeze.

     "you're the one who did a good job.
the videos you took came out better than mine," he says with a quiet laugh. then he slaps his forehead with his free hand. "agh, i obviously should've shown both members' faces! i was too focused on perfectly replicating the dog video that i didn't even think of it."

     "and your replications were perfect! my videos were just a happy accident. you should still take the credit since it was completely your idea," i express, staring deeply into his eyes to get my point across. after a moment, felix looks away, sighing.

"yeah, yeah. whatever you say hyunjin-ah," he dismisses but gives my hand a grateful squeeze. then he pulls me along as he heads towards the door. "we should get these videos to chan."

- felix -

"felix, what i'm about to tell you could be a severe risk. so, let me ask you one time, can we trust you?" chan looks at me with narrowed eyes and his jaw set tightly and i feel as if i'm being investigated for a heinous crime.

"uhm, yes?" i reply awkwardly, not sure what i'm agreeing to. a single drop of sweat slides slowly down the back of my neck.

"okay, perfect!" chan's facial expression does a full 180, now appearing happy-go-lucky as he reaches his hand out to take my phone. "here's our tiktok password," he finally reveals and i hear hyunjin's laugh from behind me as my brain reels from the emotional rollercoaster.

"hyunjin, don't you have anything you're supposed to be doing right now?" chan asks without looking up from my phone.

"mmm, nope! the only thing scheduled is seungmin and jeongin's voice lessons, so i don't have anything until dance practice at 2:30," hyunjin answers happily, swinging his legs from his spot on one of the practice room's chairs.

"great, then you can do the grocery shopping," chan responds with a smirk that only i can see.

"wait, wait, wait," hyunjin laughs a reply, waving the suggestion away with his hands.

"no waiting, i already sent you the grocery list," chan replies and just then a 'ding' emits from hyunjin's back pocket. "while you may have free time, i'm booked up the rest of the month. someone's gotta do it," chan explains with finality, putting his phone back in his pocket and tapping my arm, signaling for me to follow him towards the exit.

"but what about fe-"

"felix is coming with me," chan interrupts. "we're going to work on 'fnf' together in the studio." my eyes widen at this. i'm going to see chan's studio in person? and work with him on a song?? agreeing to do this feels completely different from actually doing it and i can not believe this is happening.

hyunjin looks like he wants to talk his way out of grocery shopping but when his eyes catch mine he
notices the barely contained excitement on my face. he snaps his mouth shut and exhales deeply through his nose before speaking again.

"fineeeee," he grumbles, grabbing his belongings with a huff and disappearing out the door. i turn and grin at chan.

"ready?" he asks, smiling back.

"ready," i confirm and follow him through the exit.

we head upstairs to the floor filled with music studios and chan leads me into one that i immediately recognize. i gasp and cover my mouth as i take in my surroundings. the walls are light-green and there is a long dark-grey couch pushed against one. i gaze at the desk set up with a large computer monitor, mixing board, and other music production essentials as well as the iconic light-grey office chair.

     "chan's room," i breathe and chan chuckles from beside me.

     "you really are a stay, huh?" he teases, poking me in the side. i yelp and jump away slightly at the touch.

     "hey, hey, hey. of course i'm a real stay," i say defensively, swatting his hands away.

     "and luckily, that's just what i need for this comeback. let's make this a five star album for stays," he resolves, pulling out a second chair and setting it up at the desk. "come sit."

i thank chan and take a seat. then i watch as he logs into the computer and pulls up his digital audio workstation. he quickly finds the "fnf" file and opens it. my stomach twists at the sea of multitracks and i thank god that i only agreed to help with the lyrics.

     "alright, i'll play the song for you again and then we can work on the areas that are missing something," chan explains before clicking play. the song pumps out of the large black speakers and i feel as if it's wrapping around me and vibrating in my chest. as i listen, ideas bubble up in my mind and when we reach the end of the track, i speak up.

"first of all, i want you to know how much i love this song and that our australian brothers and sisters will be very touched by the message."

"thank you," chan responds with a soft smile before gesturing for me to go on.

"second of all, i have an idea of what we could add. right now, the song's melody is so lovely that it doesn't quite capture the pain that the fires caused. i think it's possible that adding a couple of rap verses could bring in some of the angst that's missing."

"that's a good insight. let's hear what you were thinking," chan encourages, leaning back in his chair and waiting for me to continue. does he want me to write a rap on the spot? i clear my throat nervously before pointing at the screen.

"let me show you where i was thinking they could go," i start. "play it from the beginning and i'll tell you where to stop?"

"sure," he agrees, leaning forward again and clicking a couple of keys to restart the song.

"I see the ashes up in the sky
I can hear your voice
I reach out my hands toward you
What I get is an empty heart"

"pause here," i suggest and he clicks a key to stop it. "i think you could add a ba-dum-ba-dum-dum here and then go into a rap that carries the message from the line, 'i reach out my hands toward you.'" chan nods encouragingly and pulls out his phone, opening an audio recording app.

"do that one more time before we forget it," he instructs and clicks the red button. i imitate the sound of drums again and repeat my idea. then he places the phone to the side, still recording, and asks what the rhythm of the rap sounds like in my head. i mumble a little repetitive pattern, thinking that it's not any good, but chan nods and takes what i murmured at face value. feeling more comfortable now, i manage to start writing my first rap under chan's guidance.

—————————
tap the star if you're sad about chan's room coming to an end.

i'm devastated and going to keep living in the delusion that everything will work out and we will get chan's room back soon (as long as that is something chan wants).

— starlostlovers