Falling from Grace

TWENTY

Grace

I sat there, I still hadn't spoken much. Xavier had ordered the men to clean up the body and mess the blood had created. My body was frozen, I also felt as if I was putting on a small act. Of course I was in shocked, a man was just killed in front of me. His blood still on my face; but I also had training. I knew how to deal with this, well at least I think I do.

Allie had training, but Grace didn't this was a normal. She had never seen anything like this before and I had to ensure I didn't drop my facade.

Xavier didn't say much to me, he wiped a cloth down my face. I sat in the back room, my knees upto my chest. I couldn't do much else other than stare into space, every now and again the image of Angelos dying face flashed through my mind. I wasn't sure how I was supposed to react, was this normal?

What was normal about this entire situation? A man had just been shot and killed, his blood all over my face. The reason he was killed, he touched me. Xavier had no hesitation, what would he do to me if he found out. Would it be worse? I didn't know if I would end up dead as well.

"Grace?" He questions me. I snap my eyes up to him, I had come back down into the room. I feel like my face is clean now, it still feels like the blood is burning through my skin. "Look at me Dolcezza"

His hand cup my cheek as he leans down and pecks my lips. I don't kiss him back, I felt strange but this was also the ideal moment to get all the information I needed.

"Xavier what was that" I stutter out "Why did you do that?"

He sighs, his hand moves away from my face before running it along his jaw line. I could see the cogs turning; he was thinking of something to say. I wondered if he would tell me the truth, that he was a criminal and practically a member of the Mafia. I wanted to know if he would be honest and let it all out. Was this time for his confession?

"Grace, my sweetheart. He touched you"

He was attempting to be simple; he didn't want to give himself up. Using the fact he touched me as a sideline excuse, yes the man had touched me. But any normal person, they wouldn't react in the way he did. Shooting a family member for touching my arm, this man was psychotic.

I knew this was my time, I had to get everything out of him. I had to lie; I had to play on the feelings he had developed for me. It was the only way to get what I want. To get the confession that may get me out of this situation before it gets worse. I had feelings developing, it was getting personal. I didn't know how long I could hold back.

"Xavier you need to tell me the truth" I sigh, my head tilted up. I looked into his eyes, I knew the answer already but would he lie? "Have you killed someone before?"

I see the tension rise in his body, it was like steam coming off of him. He moved awkwardly his shoulder move back, I watch his hand trace along his jaw. There was stress running throughout his veins. He had the thoughts of if he should tell me the truth, he had killed hundreds and demanded the killing of many more.

"Grace" He sighs.

"Don't lie, I can't be with another man that lies to me"

A tear rolls down my cheek; I had to play the damsel. The tears came from a place of fear, I was so scared of him finding out about me. About how if he found out who I was, he would kill me in cold blood. He would do anything to keep his family safe.

"Who's lied to you?" Here was the protectiveness again. He wanted to harm everyone that hurts me, of course the only man that had ever lied to me was my father.

"Xavier please" I sigh, he was side tracking. He didn't want to sit there and confess to the murder of hundreds, I knew he had feelings for me. Any sane person would run a mile if he told them who he was, and what he really did. "I need you to be honest"

I forced a tear down my cheek, my knees still up against my chest. I had one arm wrapped around my legs, while the other reached out to touch his face. I needed him to trust me, I needed to be his support network. Once I got let in, I was in for good. I knew that, a man like Xavier doesn't let anyone in.

He trusted me for some reason, I wasn't sure what this reason was. But I had to use everything I could to my advantage, to keep myself safe.

I watch as Xavier stands up and turns his back to me. He was frustrated and stressed, he didn't want to tell me anything. But he knew he could loose me if he didn't. My phone was in my pocket, I had to find some way to record this conversation. I needed the evidence, I had to ensure this was recorded. As he was now facing away from me, I quickly press record before placing it back into my pocket. His back was still facing me, he didn't know.

I was safe.

"Yes okay, I have killed before but only to protect the people I love" His body turns back to face me, I allow my face to show the reaction any normal person would have. He had just killed in front of my eyes, there was no hesitation. It was clear he had done this before, so obvious even someone who hadn't read his file would know.

"Why? He apologised he didn't know-"

"So he thinks it's acceptable to touch a woman still? If you weren't mine then he would think it perfectly acceptable to sexually assault you?" He crouches down, his hand cupping my cheek as I shy my face away. "Even if you didn't want to be mine, I would kill every single man that looked at you like property. No matter how many times you told me to leave you alone, I would never leave. You are mine to protect, even if you don't want me I will protect you until the day I die"

I take a deep breath in, these promises they were intense. He wanted to keep me forever, this would never happen. Now I had his confession on tape he could be in a prison by tomorrow morning. I could ruin this all in a second, but right now I had a huge part of me screaming to not. The man in front of me was vulnerable, he was showing his love. Telling me all his secrets and declaring himself to me until he leaves this earth.

I had never had this before, a man who loves me so much he would die to protect me. Perhaps I was falling for him? I knew it was bad, I knew it was wrong.

But was it wrong to want to be loved?

To feel the warmth that love allows, to know I am safe from everyone in this world. That the man holding my cheeks in his hands, would murder anyone whom tried to hurt me. It was a safe thought. But if I became too involved in his life, the fallout would be bigger. The amount of people I would hurt would become astronomical.

Perhaps he would want me dead at that point. Maybe even kill me with his own two hands, the same hands that touch me so lovingly could be the same ones that took the life from my body.

"You're crazy" I half heartily laugh, he wipes the tear from my face.

"Grace" He speaks slowly. I look up at him, letting him know to continue talking. "You can't tell anyone about this"

"Of course"

Of course I couldn't tell anyone about it, if I did it would be the end of him. It would be the end of us and his entire operation. I knew I was in deep trouble here, when I looked into his eyes I knew I was falling faster than I thought. I couldn't stop myself before I would crash land, I knew I was naive to think I could get away with this. The second Miller found out it would all be over.

But he wouldn't find out about the recording, not unless I wanted him to know. If he found out this would be over, I'm not ready to give Xavier up just yet. He was mine and I wasn't letting him go.