Lost, Found, And Chosen.

Cingulomania

I'm genuinely trying.

I'm trying so hard to love and love myself, and love others.

I'm trying too hard one might say,

But that's always been who I am.

Yes I'm sensitive, a mess, maybe a bit meek,

But I'm novaturient, and I'm destined and willing.

I give and i give all the light now because i want to

be the person I need to see most in the world.

I just wish i had another me,

And that's what I'm trying to establish.

Since there is no other, i am building a relationship;

One with the real me and growing closer every day.

I hold cingulomania for myself.

That's why I like the hugs I get, the only embrace I ever feel.

I am xenodochial, meaning i am extremely friendly,

Because I want a friend like myself.

But all of this is just an example.

An example of the unrealistic expectations we put on others and ourselves.

It's impossible for someone to be who I need.

And it's impossible for me to fit it either.

That is so dangerous.

It keeps us at arms length within the threshold,

But prevents us from reaching it, just by an inch.

So know you'll never be where you want to be.

Yet, exactly where you need to at some point.

Because it allows you to keep learning.

When you understand that, you'll have finally chosen yourself.