I wouldn't say I'm in love (Youtube fan fiction)

Chapt. 12

SOPHOMORE YEAR-MID SPRING

So I have been single since the summer and it's killing me. I don't know how people can do it. I can't, I mean I know I was single kindergarten through seventh grade but I'm just not use to it.

So April vacation or spring break is in two weeks and I'm going to six flags with the gang. My mum and dad paid for most of it but it doesn't matter.

So I start another day with history with Ryan. He's a shy guy bit when me and the gang are around he talks a lot. Today we were working on a in-class project.

"Hey Maria..can I ask you something." Ryan doesn't usually ask me questions.

"Yeah sure. What is it?" I was working on the project while we were talking.

"Will you be my girlfriend?" What a surprise. I didn't think he would be the "dating" type.

"Aw Ryan. Sure I'll be your girlfriend!" I kissed him and continued to work on the project. I wouldn't say I'm a "homie hopper" as what my brother says. The guys always ask me out. It's not like I date them, drop them and date them again. Like Jenna for example. She always hops from guy to guy. Including my....I mean Eli.

******

Ian's Journal

I can't believe it! She's dating Ryan. I thought after Valentines day, she would have some feelings for me. Doesn't matter. It's partially my fault. I should have told her the truth about my feeling for her.

Anyways Ryan said there was only one reason why he asked her out. It was so he can watch me stuffer. And yes, he told the entire gang. EVERYONE . Ray, Anthony, Kalel, Marzia, Felix, Shane, Lisa, Kassem, Lasercorn, Sohinki, our new friend Toby and her best friend Margaret. God, Ryan is such an asshole.

Now that everyone knows about my crush, they will taunt me instead of backing me up. Well at least the guys. The girls will encourage me to ask her out. I told them all that there was only one rule to this. They COULD NOT tell Maria about it.

Anthony talked to me in privet and asked me if that was the reason I was ignoring Maria and him. Unfortunately it was the truth. He said "Man if I knew you had a crush on her I would have never asked her out." But that is in the past so it doesn't bother me.

Now every time Maria walks in the room, Kassem always makes inside jokes. Luckily Maria doesn't understand the jokes. Not saying that she's dumb but...if she understood them it would probably reveal my crush on her.

Anyways I promised myself that I would write in the journal right after Valentines day but I kind of forgot. So she said yes to the date and it was AMAZING! Well after we went to the movies, I took her to the park and we sat on the rock right in front of the lake.

I went to tell her I love her but I freaking toad scared her which scared me and I fell into the lake. And way before that, her mom gave me a condom. Ha ha I love her mom. She's always looking out for her kids. But I would be stupid enough to do it. Actually I would have the guts to do a girl like Maria or any other girl.

Some people say you'll know when you find the one. Well Maria Juliet Blue is the one I love. I LOVE YOU Maria! Yeah right. Like she would ever see that. And she won't cause this is a privet journal. Ha ha bitch! Not Maria...I was saying that in general.

*****

So April has passed and May had finally arrived! School is almost over and I'm going to be a junior! I can't believe it. Well Ryan and I have dated for less than a month and still I feel nothing. Too bad he didn't ask me out in March. I would have dumped him on April fools day.

Why am I talking like that? I such a terrible person.

Anyways so ever since the Valentines day I haven't stopped wearing Ian's Playboy necklace he gave me. I love it so much. I really do. And I kinda like Ian...I don't really know. He's been on my mind lately. But I wouldn't say I'm in love with Ian. Like I said, I still don't know.

So I continue to date Ryan. But I don't think I'm into this relationship. I think I'll dump...break up with him at the end of May. So I'll be single for the summer....whatever. I don't care anymore.