romanticist; a felinette story

chapter twenty-nine; nightmare

oh i'll lie with you, out in the dew

(one month after they started dating)
(mari)

Recently, i've been having vivid nightmares, but when I wake up I can't recall what they were about.

"felix <3"

"sleep over at my house tonight ?"

me:

"yes!! :)"

felix <3

"see you soon !"

I pray I won't have a terrible nightmare tonight. I usually would wake up in a cold sweat and I feel nauseous.
—
(felix apartment)
  (19:03)

A few hours ago, Felix picked me up from my apartment.

We sat and talked, did some work, Felix cooked for me. Just our usual.

I yawned, I was a bit nervous to go to bed tonight, knowing I have nightmares every night.

I kept clothes here, usually because Felix offered me a drawer in his wardrobe. How sweet.

I wore my pink silk pajamas, and laid down in his bed, which felt like heaven.

This mattress must've been made in heaven, when you lay down, you sink and feel at peace.

I laid on my side, I felt a dip in the bed and an arm go around my side.

When Felix was talking, I must've dozed off.
~~~~~~~~~~~
(marinette's dream)

I'm back at the hotel lobby in LA? I can't control my movements, I am just watching in this non-reality.

I can think on my own, but also here the thoughts of this person who is walking. I am just here.

I hear sirens, the person must've heard them too. The heels click on the lobby floors at this familiar place.

The person takes my vision outside, when I see a head full of blonde hair, the person notices too, I feel adrenaline and shock run through their body as they run towards the ambulance.

It's Felix, he looks horrible, blood streaming down his face, his face crushed. I was terrified.

Wake up.

Wake up.

Wake up.

I tell myself over and over to wake up to get out of this nightmare. I know i'm dreaming.

"Excuse me! Excuse me!" I suddenly put all the pieces together, this was me. My accent, my tone, my hands, my dress.

What the hell?

When she talks to the EMS worker, I watch her see the light in Felix's eyes fade.

This was Felix, my Felix.

I feel sick, why am I seeing this? Why is Felix all bloody?

Why are there rips in his expensive designer suit? Why does his nose look messed up?

I see my hands touch his hand, barely holding it, almost as if it was the most fragile thing in the whole world. 
~~~
I feel hands on my body, touching my face and wiping my tears.

I open my eyes, the lamp lights filling the room and Felix was sitting up with his hands on me.

I felt sick to my stomach imagining Felix all bloody. I feel vomit coming up my throat.

I instantly run to the bathroom, puking everything I had for dinner. I hear footsteps coming from behind me and holding my hair.

"Mari, are you okay? Are you sick?" he says, holding his hand over my head.

Why did this dream feel so real?

I sit on the floor, Felix lifted me up and walked into his bedroom with me tossed over his shoulder.

He carried me back to his bed, sitting next to me.

I cried and cried until I had a migrane.

He held me as I cried, this dream scarred me, every time I close my eyes I see the nightmare.

I don't ever want to sleep, ever again.

The man I loved, dying right before my eyes. He rubbed my hair as he held me in his arms. I felt safe, safer than ever in his arms.

"Felix?" I say. "You're never going to get hurt are you?" I ask, tears streaking down my face.

"Why would you ask me that? Is that why you're crying?" he asks, running his hands through my hair.

"Maybe." I say, leaning my head into his chest. It feels weird dating him, even though it has been a month.

"We should get back to sleep, we have work in a few hours." I say, untangling myself from his arms and laying down.

When he lies back down, "Turn around." he says, I roll over and he pulls me into a tight embrace.

I can hear his heartbeat going quickly. I can smell his body wash, which isn't a 3-in-one thankfully.

When I fell asleep, I didn't have the dream again.
—
I woke up to the smell of coffee being made, I look over and obviously don't see Felix. I roll over and get out of the comfortable bed.

Maybe Felix and I can trade beds.. and couches.

I make my way into the kitchen, hugging Felix's waist while he was facing the coffee pot.

"Good morning!" I say, he hands me a coffee. He bought my favorite creamer to put in my coffee so I don't have to drink that disgusting black coffee he loves.

"Morning!" he says, handing me a cup. I look put the window, why does Felix wake up so early, the sun isn't even out yet.

I yawn, sipping the delicious coffee.

"I'm going to go use your shower." I say, after chugging the coffee. "Mari, are you sure you want to go to work today? Last night seemed tough for you." Felix says, coming over to me.

"No, I can't skip work over a nightmare." I say. Though the dream did make me want to hug Felix forever, I chose not to let it get the best of me.

"Okay, i'll shower after you then." Felix says, walking back into the kitchen.
—
After Felix and I got ready, we headed into the office, hand in hand.

I sat at my desk, I start scheduling appointments for Felix.

Usually at the office, Felix and I don't speak because he's always busy. We eat lunch with Alya and Nino everyday.

I always feel bad for Felix, he works so hard during work hours, sometimes even after work hours.

Sometimes I bring him coffee before I head home, he doesn't ask me to bring it anymore.
—
Felix drove me to work, so usually Alya will take me.

"Felix, I think i'm going to head home." I say, leaning on his office door.

"Okay, bye Mari." he says, sounding stressed.

I walk in there and give him a hug. "Keep up the hard work." I say, I give him a kiss on the cheek and leave the office.
—