Middle Earth Mayhem

Valentine's Day

Kili: (Walking to Mirkwood)

Fili: Where are you going?

Kili: To Mirkwood! Why?

Fili: No reason! What's that in your hand?

Kili: Nothing!

Fili: No it isn't! Give it here!

Kili: No!

Fili: It's a letter! To Tauriel!!! (Opens it)

Kili: No! Stop!

Fili: (Reads aloud) "When I look into your eyes I see light. Your face is the definition of beauty. Love is more important than gold. Will you be my Valentine?" HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

Kili: (Goes red)

Fili: Awwww... My baby brother fancies an elf! HAHAHAHA!!!!

Kili: Says the guy who fancies...

Fili: Fancies who?

Kili: Um... GOLLUM!!!!

Fili: What?!

Kili: It's true...

Fili: You're so weird... (Gives back the letter) Good luck! You're going to need it!

Kili: (Walks into Thranduil's kingdom)

Thranduil: (Dancing with lotr_love)

Kili: Wasup?

Thranduil: DWARF IN MY KINGDOM!!!!! ARGH!!!!!

Kili: ARGH!!!

Thranduil: Naaa! I don't care really! It's Valentine's Day!!! Let's be friends!

Kili: Ok... TAURIEL!!!! TAURIEL!!!!

Tauriel: WHAT?! Oh, hey Kili!

Kili: (Goes red) Um... I brought you something...

Tauriel: Oh? What is it?

Kili: Here... (Hands her the letter)

Tauriel: (Reads it) Awwwww! That's so sweet!

Kili: Well, will you?

Tauriel: I'm really sorry but I promised Legolas that I would be his Valentine...

Kili: Oh... that's ok... (Sad face)

Tauriel: Sorry... maybe next year? I still got you a present though! (Gives Kili a box)

Kili: (Opens it) ARGH!!!

Gollum: (Jumps out throwing hearts in the air) SHARE THE LOVE!!!

Kili: ARGH!!! WHAT THE HECK?!

Tauriel: Hahahha!!! That was great!!!!

Kili: That was mean...

Tauriel: Oh come on... cheer up!

Kili: Thanks! (Smiles)

Tauriel: (Kisses Kili on the cheek) Happy Valentine's Day!

Kili: You too! I'm going now! Bye! (Walks away)

Fili: How was it?

Kili: Great! But she's Legolas's Valentine!

Fili: Awwwww... poor baby boo!!!

Kili: I got you a present... (Hands Fili box trying not to laugh)

Fili: Um... ok... (Opens it) ARGH!!!

Gollum: (Jumps out throwing hearts in the air) SHARE THE LOVE!!! Oh! Hello precious!! (Jumps into the river and rides on dolphins to Lake-town)

Fili: Well, that was super weird, random and pretty funny! HAHAHAHAHAHA!

Kili: HAHAHAHAHA!!!

Lindir: Ha! Lol!

Fili: Hey Lindir! Did you get a Valentine?

Lindir: Well, I did but I expect it was from my friend, Itarilde, so I'm not left out! Last year I didn't get one and I sort of went mental... It was weird!

Kili: Ok! Well that's nice of her!

Fili: Alright! Let's go!

(Lake-town)

Bard: All by myself!!!

Gollum: Why does it cry, precious?

Bard: Because I'm all by myself!!!!

Gollum: Ok! I don't care... (Sneaks away)

parallelamy: Hey Bard!!! I got you a present!

Bard: Hallelujah!!!!

parallelamy: Here! (Hands him present)

Bard: OMG!!! It's a coat like my one but sparkly and has detachable wings!!!! Awww! That's so kind of you!

parallelamy: That's ok! I knew you'd love it!!!! It's Gimli's new design!

Bard: Wow!!! This is such a privilege!!!

parallelamy: I've got to go! See ya!!!

Bard: Bye!!! Thanks again!!!

Gollum: (Gags) EWWWW! All this love is making us sick!!! Blaaaaa! Blaaaa!

Bard: Don't throw up on my coat!!!!

Gollum: We won't, stressy!!!!

Bard: Good!!

Bain: Hey dad! Err... What are you wearing?!

Bard: Oh, parallelamy got it for me!!! Isn't it amazing? (Twirls)

Bain: This is so embarrassing...

Bard: Well, that's rude!

Lindir: That is pretty embarrassing...

Bain: Thanks, Lindir!

Bard: Ugh. I'm just gonna go show Sigrid and Tilda! They'll love it!

Bain: They really won't...

Lindir: I agree!

Bain: I'm gonna go shoot at Smaug...

Smaug: Oh not this again... I think I should be paid!

Bain: You already have a whole load of gold!

Smaug: Well, Thorin made if pretty clear that it was his gold!

Bain: Oh... well, I'm sure that the master could give you some gold! He has tonnes!!!

Smaug: Well, thanks. That would help a lot!

Lindir: Lol!