Dear BeautifulLie,
This is quite the story! It's very interesting, but just watch out for those minor grammar errors.
I liked how you made it suspensful as to why Ariel she had wounds. When you say 'wounds', it was a bit of repetiton, so substitute it with other words.
I'll be posting the link to a site soon enough so you can find other synonyms/antonyms to avoid repetition.
Continue this story! I'm sure there are many readers who want it to continue!
xox, Noname O.o
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RandomHave you ever wanted somebody to critique your stories and/or give some tips? Well I'm here for the job! In the comments area, suggest your story here and I will tell you my opinion, if you should continue, and some tips to entice your readers to r...
