Baba: We should have done this right from the start.
Qing's Mama: I agree. When we learned that the kids were engaged, we should have done this with them and cleared everything up.
Mama: Well, we are here now. Better late than never.
Qing's Baba: True. And I, for one, am very glad that we can all sit down together and talk about this. All of us love Qing and Dayu and only want what is best for them.
Qing and I turned our heads to each other. We looked at each other and sighed together.
Me: They are so dramatic, I cannot take them seriously.
Qing: (taking my hand) Lets just...pray this torture will be over soon.
We both received censoring looks from our parents.
Hello, and welcome to this crazy life of mine. Here, everything feels so crazy that I stopped trying to make sense of anything. At this point, I am in the stage that we can all call "just going with the flow" stage.
And when I said flow I mean our parents arranging a meet up so all six of us could sit down around a dinner table in a nice private room on a hotel restaurant, dressed with our Sunday Best and being served with a slab of beef with tasty sauce on top of it.
We are finally having the "after the engagement proposal meeting of the parents" thing or whatever.
It is a sitdown, thats what it is. But first, there is one thing I don't understand about this meeting.
Me: Why can't we just have this sitdown in Beijing or in Harbin? Why do we all need to fly here in ShenYang, just to find a hotel restaurant to dine in?
Mama: Because this is about compromising. Beijing is Qing's family's home turf. Harbin is ours. We want it to be fair so we are meeting halfway. Hence, ShenYang.
Qing: (wincing) Since when did this engagement of ours became a thing that got us all thrown back to Kublai Khan's time? Meet halfway, what? Home turf, what?
Qing's Mama: Just know that it is a compromise. From here on out, we will seriously talk about the variables that could affect your relationship and marriage before you could actually get married.
Me: With so much hassle like this, do I even want to get married?
Everyone there: Dayu ah!
Me: (eyeing my parents) What? You just told me days ago in a phone call that I should rethink about joining Qing's family through marriage.
Baba: (clearing his throat) Its because they are having second thoughts in taking you into their family.
Qing's Mama: In fairness to me, I've never doubted how much I want Dayu as my son in law. How much I want Qing to treat Dayu right so Dayu won't leave him.
We all know that. No one in that table is questioning Qing's mother desire to have me as his son in law. We all turned our eyes to Qing's father who sighed deeply.
Qing's Baba: I will tell you all a secret of mine. And that secret is I think I am more desperate than my wife for Qing to get this right for both himself and Dayu.
Me: (blinking in susprise) Oh.
Qing: (sounding exasperated) Baba...
Qing's Baba: I am glad we are all here. I think its truly time for us to talk about our fears once the children get married. I know they had been living together for almost five years now, but we all know married life is not the same as the two of them being lovers and living together.
Mama: True. There is something to be said about being married and being resolved to living with that person for the rest of your life.
Qing's Baba: Our Qing...he might seem reliable and dependable now...but he was not always like that. Qing...he was reckless and irresponsible once...
Qing: Oh no. Not that again.
Qing's Baba: (looking at me) Dayu ah, that man you professed to love so much...has a history of being reckless irresponsible fool. He quits easily too. He had so much restless energy when he was a teenager, everyday felt like "Qing is getting into trouble again" day for us.
Qing's Mama: Oh...do we really need to dig up past history, now? Those times were stressful for me.
Qing's Baba: (looking at his wife) We should. Because your son had a tendency to quit and run when things were hard. Remember? He doesn't do it now, but your son has records of quitting at times when we need him to persevere.
Qing: I was young then. I am a changed man now.
Me: Oh...I don't think so.
All eyes turned on me.
Baba: Dayu ah, what do you mean?
Me: (shrugging) Qing quits little projects most of the times. He does that all the time in our house. He will start a little project, then he will abandon it. (chuckling) Its nothing new to me.
Qing: (looking utterly confuese) Well, its a breaking news to me. I...don't do that. Right?
Me: (snorting) What do you mean you don't do it? Remember our sink that you couldn't fix? You started it and just gave up...
Qing: (frowning) Because I am not a plumber. And I don't want to do that, you just goaded me.
Me: (nodding) True. But what about that little idea of yours to assemble a low table for us. You mocked me about my building skills when in fact, that was your idea that you threw aside so I picked it up and did it myself.
Qing: (confuse) What?
Me: (smiling to our parents) He does that all the time. He voiced out ideas, telling me he will do it but then he won't. He'll just quit it and drop the idea to go to the next one. He does it all the time.
Qing's Baba: Yes. He was like that. (sighing) I thought he outgrew it.
Qing: (in denial) Wait a minute, I did outgrew it. Dayu ah...I think you are mistaken...
Me: One time, Qing said he will rearrange his toy figure collection to make space for a little shelf where he can put more toy figures. He bought the cabinet, all he has to do was assemble it. He never done it. One night, he got home and the cabinet was already assembled neatly. Who did it? I did. It was his project, I did it. He does things around halfheartedly most of the times.
Qing's Mama: (looking upset) Wang Qing.
Qing: (groaning) That...its...what?
Mama: (looking at me) And you are fine with that attitude of his?
Me: (shrugging as I cut my beef) Sure. Its not like its a crime to give up on a project. And its not like Qing ask me to pick up the slacks for him. It could take time, but he does finish things once he remember to do them. I just didn't know he used to quit about them before.
Qing's Baba: He does. Before. He used to run around our home, having all these ideas and then quitting them halfway when things never went his way. One hard hurdle and he picked his tools and quit finishing what he started.
Qing's Mama: (nodding) It worried us, to be honest. But Qing changed when he turned twenty. He suddenly started persevering to study hard and finish his tasks. And when he started living with Dayu, we never heard complaints from Dayu so we thought, Qing has indeed totally changed. (again with looking upset) I never thought he is still like that.
We all look at my fiancé with new perspective.
Qing: (wincing) I...what do you want me to say to that?
Me: (laughing) Nothing. I don't find it annoying or anything. (smiling at our parents) I just think of it as him being a slob in our home. Besides, when it comes to things that truly matters, Qing is more reliable than me. And he always has this attitude of once he got his resolves down, he doesn't stop until he accomplished what he envision to accomplish. Once he got going, nobody can stop him. Thats how he is.
Qing's Baba: I'm glad to know that. (looking at Qing) So now, can you blame me for being concern? I know you, Son. I used to see you quit when things got difficult. And Dayu's condition is difficult. I just want to make sure you are both ready to marry and spend your life together with his panic attack.
Qing: (sighing) I won't quit on his panic attack. Dayu's panic attack is Dayu. Its a part of him now. If I quit on his panic attack, that automatically means I am quitting Dayu as well. Well no, I will never quit on Dayu. Not him.
That made me smile. I kissed my fiancé cheek.
Me: That is sweet.
Qing: (wincing as he smiled at me) Sorry for being a slob in the house. Should I promise to finish every project I think about?
Me: (shaking my head) Nah. You might have an OCD like me. I told you before, this relationship could only handle one OCD. Thats me so you stay as messy as you are.
Qing chuckled and he kissed my cheek as well.
Qing: Thanks, Love. For letting me be messy.
Mama: Oh speaking of messy...(wincing at Qing's parents) My husband and I would like you all to know that Dayu is one big mess when he allowed himself to be that.
Me: (eyes widening) Mama!
Qing: (laughing) Oh Love, its your turn now. I will enjoy this immensely.
Me: (to my Baba) Baba, stop Mama!
Baba: (sighing) How? The Wangs might as well know about you, Son. They should know before they let their son marry you.
Me: (to Qing's mother) But I am perfect. Right, Mama?
Qing's Mama: (to my parents) Is he? Perfect, I mean...
Me: Mama!
Mama: (to Qing's parents) If you can overlook our son's...shall we say...eccentric way of thinking, we will be every grateful to let Qing marry him.
Me: Eccentric?!
Qing: Is that another way of saying that Dayu is crazy? Because I know that already.
Me: (smacking his bicep) I am not crazy! You...
Qing's mother: (laughing softly) (gazing at me fondly) Yes, our Dayu is not crazy. He is adorable.
Qing's father: And Qing will be lucky to marry someone like Dayu. That is my opinion.
I beamed at Qing's parents. They truly love me.
Baba: (wincing) He once acted like a warlock and brewed something in an old cauldron that he thought will make him grow tall faster. He added rat poison on that concoction.
Qing coughed in surprise at what he heard. His parents gazed at me in the new light. With a mixture of pained and shocked looks on their eyes.
Qing: (looking at me) Why didn't I know about that?
Me: I was twelve that time. And I am allowed to keep secrets from you.
Qing: Secrets like you almost killed yourself by drinking some rat poison?
Me: (pouting) It didn't happen because my Mama managed to stop me...
Mama: Barely on time. If Dayu didn't hate drinking hot beverages back then, he could have drunk it already. Instead, he put the concoction on the fridge first and waited for it to freeze.
Baba: (sighing) He thought he could turn it into ice cream or popsicle at the very least before consuming it.
Qing's mother: Oh my...wow...
Qing: (staring at me like he thinks I am strange) You love ice cream that much? You wanted to be tall like that desperately?!
Me: It was during class summer break! And I was one of the smallest boys in our class. Being teased for being small. I wanted to be tall, of course! What was wrong with that?
Qing: What was wrong was that you almost killed yourself! You...
Me: It didn't happen! Mama and Baba managed to stop me...
Mama: (sighing) And we were happy that we did it too. But that's just one of the long line of peculiarities of our son has. He wanted to grow tall, he wanted to fly...(sighing again) One time, he wanted to hunt leprechauns and unicorns and build a yellow brick road...
Mama gazed at me with worry. Then she smiled.
Mama: He is our precious son. He has so many ideas. Sometimes he is fearless. He is reckless. He could be extremely selfish too. And yes, he could be crazy. But he is our precious son...(looking at Qing and his parents) And if Qing couldn't handle our son's many unique qualities...I don't think I could give Dayu to Qing. If he couldn't love Dayu right, and accept the magnitude of our son's way of thinking, I don't think my mind will be at peace if I will let them continue...
Qing: (cutting in) Dayu once thought our neighbor was breeding snakes in his unit. He managed to convince the owner of the unit across from us...
Qing's mother: The Goddess?
Qing: (nodding) Yes, the Goddess. Dayu managed to convince her that there were indeed snakes on unit four. And what more? He managed to convince the security staffs on the building to invade that unit and unhinged the door of one of the rooms in it.
Baba: And please tell us that they found some snakes. Please...
Qing: No snakes. There were an ant farm but no snakes.
Every eyes there turned on me. I felt the spotlight beaming all over me as I got their attentions. I smacked Qing's arm again.
Me: (snarling at my fiancé) You promised never to tell that story to our parents!
Qing: I need them to understand that I do understand the magnitude of your craziness. You said you heard hissing inside the walls like you were Harry Potter.
Me: I did heard hissing inside our walls!
Qing: It was the broken air conditioner on unit 4. It was hissing because it was broken.
Me: (smiling cajolingly to our parents) See?! I was right. I heard hissing.
Baba: (at Qing) Is that the only "story" about Dayu that you have?
Qing opened his mouth to answer but I moved my thigh to put it over his. Pinning his thigh under mine. My mother, who is sitting on my other side, saw what I did.
Mama: Dayu ah.
Me: (staring at Qing) Do you have something to say? Huh?!
Qing: (to our parents) Many. So many more "story" like that.
Me: Wang Qing!
Qing put an arm around my shoulder and pulled me close to him.
Qing: It'll be alright. Its not like they can take you away from me. Nobody can.
Our parents stared at us. Then Qing's mother sighed.
Qing's mother: I don't think we have to worry. They are both crazy.
Baba: (nodding) I think so too.
Mama: Can't we save them?
Qing's father: How? They are already crazy together. (sighing in defeat)
Baba: Then I am glad they decided to have a long engagement. That'll be the best for them.
Qing's mother: I think its for the best too.
Mama: Lets just hope that by the time they marry, they have matured more.
Qing's father: I'm not gonna hold my breath for that one.
Baba: Me too.
Our mothers gave us helpless looks before they went back to eating and changed the subject of conversation. I think they have given up mentioning how crazy their sons are. And dinner in ShenYang ended well and normally like that.
I guess, thats the whole sitdown. Our wedding will push through and we are back in schedule people. He he