CHAPTER ELEVEN |
silly love songs
***
EVER SINCE HE won the game last week, Finn had been more arrogant than Kayla had ever seen him. He suddenly thought he was tough shit. On one hand, Kayla was glad that he seemed to be moving on from Rachel. He looked a lot happier, but she couldn't help but hate how big his ego had gotten. The championship game had made pretty much every girl fall at his feet and she was convinced the attention was going straight to his head.
Finn was standing in front of the glee club, proclaiming his next big idea to get the money they needed to pay for Nationals—a kissing booth.
"No one wants to kiss you." Kayla nearly gagged as she told him.
Kayla didn't notice the way Rachel's head dropped as she said it. She wouldn't admit it to Kayla, but she missed Finn. She knew it was hypocritical of her to still want him when they broke up so that she could be with her, but she couldn't help her feelings. Finn was the only guy who had ever made her feel normal. It was the same way that Kayla made her feel and that's why she was so confused. She didn't know how she could be in love with two people at the same time, but she wanted her heart to make a decision.
Finn rolled his eyes at Kayla's words and continued to try to sell his kissing booth idea. Mr. Schuester agreed to it and that was it. Kayla scoffed when Finn smirked in her direction. They were very obviously on bad terms again after the big breakup.
Kayla hated being his enemy. She hated that she had hurt him. She couldn't seem to get that image of Finn's face out of her head. Now all he did was glare at her. It was obvious he still wasn't over Rachel and Kayla was the only thing standing in between them. She was the one that stole Rachel away from him. He didn't need to know that it was Rachel who went after her. She didn't want to shove that in his face.
Only the day after, the kissing booth was up and running and it was really backing up the foot traffic in the hallways. Girls were lined up for miles to get a kiss from the quarterback. She passed the booth quite a few times with a scoff or a snort.
She was walking down the hallway with Sam. He was flipping out about his relationship with Quinn. Just last week, it was the other way around, but Sam had recently felt a change in their relationship. He thought Quinn was distancing herself and even Kayla had begun to see it.
"I just—am I being crazy or is she really ignoring me?" Sam frowned as they started walking to English class. "I feel like she's still not over Finn."
She didn't know why she suggested it, but the words came out of her mouth before she could stop herself. "Make her kiss Finn. Then you'll know for sure whether or not she still likes him."
Sam grinned. "That's a great idea!"
Kayla's eyes widened when she realized what she said and she immediately backtracked. "Wait, um—"
Before she could finish her sentence, Sam ran off. "That was a joke."
←⧪→
"What? You don't want a kiss, Kay-Kay?" Finn belittled Kayla as she passed him in the hallway, puckering her lips.
Kayla called out while she walked away. "I don't kiss little bitches!"
She didn't look back to see Finn's pout. He had become such an asshole lately and she was tired of it. She knew he was hurting, but every time he was upset, he always seemed to take it out on her. She was walking to her locker when she saw Sam pulling Quinn up to the kissing booth. She grimaced and decided to follow them. She couldn't believe he was actually going to make her kiss Finn.
She stood at her locker, watching the exchange between Quinn and Sam as they argued over her feelings for him. Sam handed Finn a dollar and stood to the side to watch their little kiss. The kiss was very tame and ended within two seconds. Sam seemed to look more relieved and he wrapped his arms around Quinn's waist, apologizing for how much he had overreacted. They started walking away from the booth until Quinn mumbled that she forgot her purse and quickly ran back to the booth. Kayla's jaw dropped when she watched Quinn whisper in Finn's ear to meet her at the auditorium after school. They were cheating. She knew it and Sam was completely oblivious.
By the time school had ended, she'd thought about the energy exchanges she saw between Finn and Quinn multiple times. She knew it wasn't her business whether or not they were sneaking around, but Sam was her best friend and she felt that she needed to find out for his sake. If she suspected something and it turned out to be true, it could break him and she wanted to protect him at all costs.
She found herself standing at the doors of the auditorium, peaking around the corner. She could faintly hear Quinn and Finn speaking about Sam. They were standing around a singular lightbulb nailed to the floor and he grabbed her hand. Kayla's head fell when he leaned in for a kiss and Quinn entertained the idea, leaning in for more. Her suspicions had been confirmed. Quinn was cheating and she had to tell Sam.
She quickly and quietly left the auditorium as the gears started spinning in her brain. She didn't know how she was going to break this to Sam. He was perfect. He didn't deserved to have something like this happen to him. There wasn't a single thing to hate about him—even his impressions weren't that bad. He was actually really smart and he was sensitive, sweet. He made it his job to make people laugh and he was the one anyone could turn to when they were upset. He wasn't bad to look at either. Even she could admit that he had a great body. The idea that he was the absolute package and Quinn was still doing this to him was breaking her heart. She understood that there was history there with Finn and they never really got to explore it after the baby drama happened, but there was a time and a place and being in a relationship with another guy at the same time was not it.
She was broken out of her thoughts by her phone ringing and she frowned when she recognized the number as Kris's. She took a deep breath and answered it. As much as she didn't want to, she knew if she didn't that she'd just keep calling.
"Kay-Bells. You answered." Kris breathed out softly.
Kayla mentally rolled her eyes. She always hated that nickname. "What do you want, Kristina?"
"Darling, won't you call me mom?"
Her blood boiled at the term of endearment. She hated Kris. She was not and never would be her mom. Mothers didn't do what she did to Kayla.
"You are not my mother. My mom is named Denise and she's raised me since I was ten. She raised me and Aaron to be good people. Not what you did."
"Wait, Kayla—" Before Kris could answer, Kayla hung up. A small tear left her eye. She hated being reminded of that time. She hated who she was then, who Kris made her become.
She tried to shake out the nerves Kris had brought back and instead walked to her car, trying to find any solution on how to tell Sam that his girlfriend was cheating on him.
←⧪→
Kayla was in the nurse's office with Santana. The latina had just gotten her ass beat by Lauren Zizes and the whole school saw it. As much as Santana attempted to show herself as this strong girl from Lima Heights Adjacent, she was just a girl and she wasn't as tough as she made herself seem. Kayla and Brittany seemed to be the only ones who saw that.
Santana was unconscious as little snores escaped her mouth. Kayla smiled as she watched the girl sleep. She needed to rest after all that. Kayla was sitting on a stool in the corner of the room, scrolling through her phone as she waited for her friend to wake up. Sam's name popped up on her phone and she smiled, picking it up.
"Hey Rocky. What's up?" she smiled, whispering softly so as not to disturb a sleeping Santana.
Sam sighed. "Quinn has mono."
Kayla's face comically cringed up and cursed mentally, knowing that there was absolutely no way that she could keep it from him anymore. She had to tell him the truth.
She blurted out, "Quinn's cheating on you with Finn."
She closed her eyes, prepared for Sam to either start crying or yelling but instead was met with the sound of his bright laughter.
"That's silly, Kays. Quinn saved Finn's life." he answered.
She questioned in confusion, "What are you talking about?"
"Finn was choking on a gum ball and Quinn gave him CPR. That's how she got mono. Don't be silly."
Her face was a mixture of surprise and confusion. She knew in her hearts of hearts that that dumb story was just what Sam wanted to believe and it wasn't what had actually happened. She saw Quinn and Finn without an audience and she heard the conversations of her leaving Sam for him. She knew the truth and she was sure that Sam did too. He just didn't want to believe it.
"Oh, um. Is that all?" she trailed. She didn't know why he would just call to tell her about Quinn's mono.
"Yeah. I just wanted to warn you in case you shared lipstick or anything." Sam noted.
She chuckled slightly, noticing as Santana started moving about and she quickly ended the call. "Hey, I'll call you back. I have to do something. Love you, bye."
Santana awoke in a daze, her eyes squinting as she adjusted to the light in the office. She grimaced as she sat up and Kayla could tell that she was sore from being thrown into the lockers so many times.
"What happened?" Santana croaked.
Kayla gave her a sympathetic smile. "Zizes beat your ass."
She groaned, rubbing her head. "Fuck. It was all in my head. I thought I won."
The brunette chuckled, scooting closer to her friend as she handed her the ice pack the nurse gave her. She sat quietly for a moment, watching Santana ice her wounds, before the silence became too much to bear and she let her thoughts overflow.
"Why did you even fight her? You don't like Puck, San. You like Brittany." Kayla noted the way Santana seemed to tense up when she mentioned the blonde.
Santana quickly deflected. "Not this again."
Kayla looked at her with a blank stare. "Don't lie to yourself, please. This only gets harder when you deny it."
"I don't like Brittany, okay? She's my friend and sometimes we sleep together, but that's it. There's no feelings involved. I'm not like you, Kayla. Stop trying to make me gay." she whisper-shouted.
Kayla knew Santana didn't want anyone to know, but she couldn't keep lying to herself like this. She didn't take any offense to Santana's words. This was always the reaction she got when she talked with others about accepting their sexualities and it wasn't an easy subject. Usually they always took it out on her, but this time she didn't mind.
"I'm not trying to make you gay, San, but you have to stop pushing it back. Straight girls don't sleep with their bffs. I know it's hard to accept that you can be different and it's not going to be easy at all, but once you admit it to yourself, you'll be one step closer to happiness."
"Whatever. If I wanted advice on how to be a lesbo, I would have just read one of Ms. Pillsbury's pamphlets." Santana gave her the cold shoulder, turning away from her gaze.
Kayla nodded, understanding that the conversation wasn't going to go any further than this. "Okay. If you need me, you know where to find me."
Santana didn't look at her as she walked out of the office, but that didn't matter to Kayla. At least they'd had some semblance of a conversation. Santana wasn't ready yet and that was okay. Kayla wanted her to know that she would be there when she was.
Kayla walked out of the office with a small smile, making her way to the choir room where Rachel asked to meet her. Rachel said she wanted to talk and she was kind of worried about the outcome. Maybe Rachel would be breaking her heart once more. She couldn't help thinking about the worst possible outcome. It was just in her nature to panic.
Rachel was sitting on the platform where usually the chairs were, but instead they were all in stacks on the wall. No one was in there except for her. She was looking down at her lap, playing with her fingers. Kayla could see the way her head was spinning. She was overthinking too.
"Rach?" Kayla mumbled as she entered the choir room.
The brunette looked up quickly and grinned. She seemed happy to see Kayla which calmed the girl's nerves immediately. She sat down next to her hesitantly.
"What did you want to talk about?" Kayla asked softly. She wasn't sure that she wanted to hear the answer, but she knew it needed to be done.
"Us." Oh.
"What about us?" Kayla whispered, looking down at her lap. Rachel frowned, grabbing her best friend's hand.
"It's nothing bad. I just want to see where your head's at."
Kayla sighed in relief. She was almost sure Rachel was about to break up with her before they'd even gone on an actual date.
"Well, you know I love you and I want to be with you. I just... I don't want to be a couple yet." Kayla answered honestly, watching Rachel's head drop.
"No, no. That's not a bad thing. I just don't want us to rush into a relationship when you just got out of one and before we've even really gotten to know the non-platonic side to our relationship."
"Okay. So what does that mean for us?" Rachel asked, squeezing the younger girl's hand.
Kayla smiled. "It means we just take it slow for now. We figure out what we want before we dive in too deep. I—I don't want to ruin this. Ever."
"Me neither." Rachel half smiled, leaning in to kiss Kayla's cheek. The brunette closed her eyes as she felt the diva's lips linger before she let go of her hand and walked out.
Kayla felt like they were on their way to something wonderful and Rachel felt like they were on their way to disaster. She wanted this to work. She just wasn't sure if it would.
____________________________________
[A/N: guys, this might be the longest chapter of season 2! also, we are soooo close to 8k which is unbelievable to me. you guys are unbelievable to me. my love for this story and these characters grows stronger everyday and i can't believe there was ever a time i wasn't writing this 😭 anyway, next chapter is Comeback which is an icon of an episode. we're gonna have a lot of Evarrett (sam and kayla's ship name), so look forward to that. also starting to explore her friendship with santana which is so precious to me. all the love 💗💗💗]
*edited 1/14/23
~ Dani