Between the play and Blake staying over, yesterday was a very long one. Though I was able to act, I was still worried that dad might not like it. Mom would have been thrilled even if I sang, though I am tone-deaf, my father is the one hard to please.
"You can actually act!" He exclaimed when he saw me.
A smile was magically formed on my face; he liked it!
He cleared his throat, "I thought that you were bluffing with all the acting stuff, but you are not bad at all."
Mom took me in a big hug saying how proud she was of me.
"What about the play, dad, did you like it too?" I asked, biting my lower lip, hoping that he would say something good about Blake.
He rolled his eyes, "if you are asking about Blake, he is not a very bad writer."
I giggled and hugged him tightly; I was glad that he liked the play!
Meeting Kristen again was strange. Though I have to say, I liked the way that Blake handled the situation.
When I go down for breakfast, dad is already having his coffee while reading the newspaper, and mom prepares breakfast, Blake is nowhere to be seen.
"Good morning!" I say going to help mom.
"Morning, love" mom chirps then winks, "did you sleep well?"
I frown, and dad interrupts, "I don't like that wink, why did you wink? What happened? Should I bring the baseball bat?"
"No," both mom and I shout.
I sigh, "I don't know why you winked, but I slept soundly and alone."
She tilts her head, "but Blake's bed is empty."
Dad chocks on his coffee as the doorbell rings.
"I will get it," I say, happy with the distraction.
When I open the door, I find Blake shaved, clean and in new clothes.
Though we have been working together for months, this is the first time I have seen him without a jacket. He is wearing a purple one with black stripes as if it's paint scattered on it with black jeans and his grey scarf; he can't live without a scarf.
"Are you done staring, Harp?" He says with a raised eyebrow and his signature smirk.
I shake my head and move away so he can enter, "sorry."
He kisses my cheek, "it's OK; I liked that look in your eyes."
I didn't know that my cheeks could become even redder.
"Have you read what critics are saying about the play?" He asks with a wide smile.
I shake my head, "No, I just woke up."
"Good morning, Mr and Mrs Jones," Blake salutes going to his seat next to me, "by tomorrow, your daughter would be more famous than Meryl Streep."
We spent breakfast talking about what critics said about the play. Most of the comments were positive though my freezing moment didn't go unnoticed by the critics. Then the conversation turned to that damned barbecue party, and my stomach churned. Having that party means that all of our relatives and friends will be there, it means that he will be there.
I look at Blake; he is preparing things with dad. God, I love him! I never realized how important he is to me until now, and I am still keeping things away from him. Damn my stupidity!
As time passes, people start arriving, smiling and congratulating, and the pain in my stomach just keeps increasing.
I hand Blake a glass of lemonade and a kiss on the cheek, "you have been working very hard."
He takes a long gulp, "anything to please your father."
I bite my lower lip, "does that mean that you don't have a moment to talk?"
He smirks and wraps an arm around my waist after making sure that dad isn't looking, "I always have time for you."
I smile and take his hand, "come with me."
He looks confused but plays along till we arrive at my room.
"You know that you are destroying everything that I am trying to build with your father," he says with a smile.
I sit on the bed and pat the place next to me for him to sit, he frowns, "OK, what's wrong, Harp?"
I look at him then take a huge breath, "I am going to tell you something, but you have to promise that you will stay quiet till I finish talking."
His frown becomes deep, but he nods, "sure."
I take a deep breath and close my eyes, "I don't know where to start, so I will just start from the very beginning. My father has a childhood friend, Uncle Tim; he is more like a brother to dad. Uncle Tim has a son, and when I was born, they both decided that those kids would tie both families together."
I clench my teeth still with closed eyes, "As I grow up, the boy, Kevin, was always here. When we were children, we were the closest friends, but we grow apart in high school. He became some sort of a bad boy, skipping classes and causing trouble and I was normal, not a genius but not a delinquent either. We still met in family reunions, we didn't really talk, but we got along well. We were sitting together alone one day, and he held my hand and asked me to be his girlfriend."
A sad laugh escapes from my mouth, "I couldn't believe it, the guy that my parents kept talking about, the guy who I have been dreaming about asked me out. I was so excited; to say the least. A few months passed, and things were actually good between us. He treated me well; we went out at the weekends, we used to sneak kisses behind our parents' backs, we didn't try to change each other, things were perfect."
Trigger warning: Potential rape
I can feel my mouth shake as I talk, "until we went to a party together, it was a normal one, full of loud music and moist air, but I enjoyed them at the time, it made me feel elated. We were dancing, and he didn't feel well all of a sudden. He told me that he needed to lie down, so we went to an empty room that we found"
I fall silent trying to suppress the tears, "but once we entered that room, he started to kiss me, at first, I didn't mind, it was fun and exciting... but he started to touch me, I pushed his hand away, but he would try again. I felt so scared and pushed him away. I told him that I didn't want that, he replied that I was his girlfriend and doing that is normal. He tried again, but I pushed him again."
I begin to breathe quickly, the memories are more vivid than my liking, "I tried to go to the door, but he caged me and started kissing me again. I tried to push him again and again, but he wouldn't budge. I was freaking out, I didn't know what to do, then I found a perfume can, I took it and with all my strength hit him with it. Of course, it wasn't enough to hurt him, but it was enough to make him a bit weaker, I pushed him away, and when I got out of that room, I told him that I don't want to see him again. He never ran after me, neither in the party nor the next day in school. He just ignored me. In our family reunions, he tried to skip most of the time."
End of trigger scene
I sigh, "He went abroad for college and came back two years ago. When he came back, he began to talk to me as if nothing has happened; he even tried to touch me a few times. It's just as if he didn't try to rape me a few years ago."
When I finish, I look at Blake and my mouth drop. Tears and anger fill his eyes. He looks back at me, "how do your parents still allow him to come here?"
"Beside Kevin and I, you are the only one who knows this story."
His eyes grow wide, "you have never told anyone"
I shake my head.
He grabs my arms tightly, "how could you stay silent about this?"
I wince, "you are hurting me."
"Sorry," he says, quickly reducing the pressure of his hands on my arms.
"I didn't want to talk about it for a long time until I felt that it was too late to speak up."
"It's never too late!" He shouts.
"I felt that he was regretful." I shout back, "he stayed away from me; he never tried to talk..."
"He never tried to apologize either," Blake retorts.
"Are you seriously blaming me, at a time like this?" I scream at his face, frustrated with everything.
He closes his eyes, "no, it's just..."
He takes another look at me and sighs. He scoots closer and hugs me, burying my face in his chest and letting me cry all I want.
I never cried that hard before.
And the final secret is revealed!
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