10 HOURS AWAY | Harry Styles AU
chapter 23 - second chance
This was the first time in my entire life, a guy had asked me to continue where we left off or call it quits. It was unnatural to me to be in charge of someone else's feelings because I was used to being on the other side.
Maybe it was a good thing, I got to witness what it was like to have the power. I wasn't going to abuse it by leading him on – I would never. But it gave me a slight confidence boost to know it could be the other way around, too.
"Let's stay together." I said.
"You mean that?" he questioned me.
"I do, Harry."
Once his eyes expressed utter joy, his mouth transformed into a bright grin. He tried to hide it but realized his happiness took over his features. "That makes me really happy." Harry said, as if I hadn't noticed yet. "You won't regret it." he promised me.
Harry took my hand in his. This was the first time, in a long time, I felt his skin. My eyes focused on his fingers that brushed against mine, and I knew I had made the right decision. Experiencing his touch made me understand I wouldn't have been able to miss out on this. Knowing he had already such an effect on me when we hadn't taken any serious steps, made me wonder what was about to happen during the rest of my stay.
You won't regret it, were his words – now burned in the back of my mind.
I truly hoped he wouldn't because I already knew it would break my heart if he did.
Allowing us to find out if we could be together was a big step I usually wouldn't take, but for Harry I would happily make an exception.
I wish I could've stayed longer and spend time with Harry, but I was distracted when I got a notification. As I let go of his hand and retrieved the phone from my pocket, I saw I had received an email from my new mentor. She introduced herself shortly and asked me to share my latest work with her. Also, she wanted to see me tomorrow afternoon – I felt myself getting nervous already.
If Mrs. Jones was going to replace Mrs. Clark, she'd be my mentor for the upcoming months and see me publish my debut novel. It was still difficult for me to accept I wasn't going to see Mrs. Clark ever again because I trusted her, but I had no say in this whole change. I had to accept the replacement and get myself to trust Mrs. Jones.
"I have to go." I said, sounding gloomy.
"Everything okay?" he asked.
"Yeah. I just got assigned to a new mentor. She wants to read my latest draft." I explained and showed him the email from Mrs. Jones.
"Do you want me to take you home?" Harry asked and I nodded.
Despite wanting to spend more time with Harry, I had to get back. I didn't have access to my work from anyone else's laptop, so I needed my own.
During the drive to my home, I tried to look at him as much as I could – without making it too obvious. He was handsome – incredibly handsome. And I couldn't get enough of him. From the moment we met, his looks had always amazed me.
As one of his hands rested on the steering wheel, the other was intertwined with mine. After we buckled our seatbelts, he automatically took my hand in his. I was surprised at first but didn't mind the small gesture. Earlier today I was afraid we wouldn't see each other ever again, but it had taken a drastic turn – one for the better.
Harry dropped me off at my apartment and insisted on walking me to my door. I liked to have him by my side for a little while longer.
"I'm glad we worked things out today, Liz." he said.
"Me too." I agreed as I fiddled with my keys in my hand. "Thanks for driving me home."
"No worries." Harry waved me off with a smile. "When will I see you again?"
I could feel myself blush as his sweet words made me feel all kinds of things.
"What about tomorrow night? We can have dinner together? Or maybe watch a movie?" I rambled on – hopefully, I didn't scare him away.
"Let's do both, okay?" he suggested, and I nodded in agreement. "I'll make sure to order sushi before coming to your place."
"I won't be back before 6 pm, I think. So don't order too soon." I let him know.
"Noted." he said.
To my surprise, Harry leaned forward and planted a delicate kiss on my cheek. The way he pressed his lips onto my cheek instead of my lips was screamingly adorable, so I wanted him to do it again. Feeling his lips against my skin was something I consistently enjoyed, and I knew I wasn't ever going to get used to it.
"Good night, Liz." he whispered.
"Good night, Harry."
I shut the door behind me, and pressed my back against it. I stared heavenward as I let today's endeavors sink in. Early in the afternoon, there seemed to be an ending to our story. Instead of putting our book on the shelve, we continued where we left off.
It had been two years since I had found myself liking a guy. But with Harry it was different – so much different.
I logged into my laptop and emailed Mrs. Jones immediately. The document that contained my story was attached to it. Although I wasn't used to sharing this story with someone else than Mrs. Clark, I was okay with forwarding it to Mrs. Jones.
While the four of us were in Dallas, we had worked on our newest chapters. I started to fall in love with my characters, and I was becoming more confident about this piece. Perhaps, this storyline would be the one being published.
Once the email was sent, I made my way to the kitchen. I leaned on the door of the refrigerator and stared at the choice of food. There wasn't much I could choose from, so I decided to go for a tasteless microwave-meal.
While my dinner was almost ready, I took a seat on the windowsill. In the back of my mind I debated whether to open up the window or not. The autumn air had replaced the sunny days, so I knew the chilly air would creep inside of my apartment. But after I grabbed the pack of cigarettes out of the kitchen drawer which was stuffed with random things, I lifted the blind and opened the window.
Normally, I wouldn't buy a pack of cigarettes but all of us had bought one in Dallas – Mia was tired of sharing hers. I slid one cigarette out of the wrapping and carefully lit it. The smoke escaped the room through the rendered window as I looked outside.
What had taken place between Harry and I was dreamlike. If anything, this wasn't something that often happened in my life. I rarely got involved with guys, let alone get stuck in a situation like this.
Of course, my brain wouldn't be my own if it didn't start to overthink.
Like Harry, I wanted to give us the chance. But how does something like this work when there comes a moment we have to separate? Not because we want to, but because we must.
My residence permit wasn't going to stay valid my entire life.
The thought already burdened me. I knew I was wholly stupid for even thinking about all of this so soon, but it was the way my brain worked – very exhausting at times.
I noticed I was done smoking the cigarette and then the ding of the microwave followed. Thankfully, the food I was about to eat made me forget to think about Harry and I.
Later that night, I hopped into the shower and pampered myself afterward. I wasn't going to see Mia, Isaac, or Carter tonight, so I could've some quality time.
My hand moved along the books which were placed on the crooked shelves. I had brought a couple of novels with me, so I could fall in love with fictional characters other than my own.
As I sat down on my couch, a blanket was wrapped around me and a glass of red wine was placed in front of me. I started reading the first pages of One Day by David Nicholls.
This wasn't my first time reading it. The story of Emma and Dexter had captivated me years ago, and would forever make me feel all kinds of emotions.
Even though Harry and I didn't grow up together nor had been in each other's lives for years on end, I didn't want to look back on this year in the United States and regret never giving it a try.
It took Em and Dex years to get together.
Harry and I didn't have years. We had one year to be in each other's life. And there wasn't time to waste.
Two hours later, I went to bed. After I set an alarm, Harry texted me.
Harry: I still think about our conversation.
Liz: You do?
Harry: Yes. Like a weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
Harry: I have very big shoulders, so just know that's a lot.
Liz: I am not even going to comment on the second message..
Harry: :(
A smile was plastered across my face.
Harry: I'm really happy you've given me a second chance.
Liz: Now I have high expectations, ya know?
Harry: I'll live up to all of them. I know it :)
Liz: You better because I don't want to have a conversation like that – ever again.
Harry: I'll make sure of it
Liz: I like texting you
Liz: but it doesn't come close to talking to you in real life.
Harry: I couldn't agree more. That's why I'm already excited to see you.
Liz: :)
Harry: I will text you tomorrow because I'm so close to falling asleep. Let me know how the meeting with your new mentor went, okay?
Liz: If she's nice, are you going to bring her sushi then?
Harry: I might consider it.
Harry: But I do prefer to see you.
Harry: over anyone and anything else.
I was waiting impatiently in front of Mrs. Jones's office. I kept rechecking my watch to see if time had passed by, but it was going incredibly slow. I stood up from my seat but sat down again, and then stood up again. I started to pace back and forth in the hallway as I told myself this would not be so bad. I was making myself go insane when nothing terrible had happened.
When Mrs. Jones opened the door, I instantly locked eyes with her. She told me to get inside and then returned to her desk. Hastily I grabbed my belongings and pressed them against my chest when I walked in.
I barely recognized the inside of the office. Everything that was once inside, was gone. Mrs. Clark had taken everything with her. Even the snow-globe I used to look at when I was too nervous to make eye-contact.
I spotted the first couple of pages laying on her desk and my nerves were back. I don't know why, but I got very clumsy and stumbled over to the chair I normally sat on. I kept the papers filled with story ideas and the descriptions of the characters close to me.
"Are you nervous?"
"Is it that obvious?" I asked.
"Yes." Mrs. Jones said directly. "Take a seat, Liz."
I nodded and sat down.
"Mrs. Clark talked very highly of you."
"She did?" I was surprised.
"Absolutely. She says you've grown a lot in a short amount of time." Mrs. Jones let me know, and I could feel myself become at ease.
Maybe this wasn't so bad after all?
"Mrs. Clark told me your work is very promising."
"I'm glad she said that." I let Mrs. Jones know.
"I'm sure you are." she said. "But I don't think it is, Liz."
"W-What?" I stuttered.
"After all the kind words Mrs. Clark shared about your writing, I expected more of you, Liz." she said without taking my feelings into consideration.
No one has been able to make me feel worthless so fast.
"W-What d-"
"These are the most tedious twenty pages I've ever read in my career." she continued shamelessly. "There has never been one moment you grabbed my attention. It's ludicrous to be proud of what you've written so far. There's not one single page that stood out or impressed me."
"I don't know what to say."
"You should say sorry."
"Why? That doesn't make sense." I objected.
"You wasted my time." Mrs. Jones claimed. "Last night I could have spent time with my family, but I was obliged to read your work. The weird thing is, I was somewhat looking forward to what you had written so far. But there's nothing original about the story you wrote down. Where is your talent?"
I had no idea why Mrs. Jones was treating me like this.
Instantly, I wanted Mrs. Clark again. Right now, I would even get on a plane to convince Mrs. Clark to take her old job back and navigate me through this whole year.
"Aren't you supposed to be my mentor?" I told with a hint of anger in my voice.
"I am mentoring you right now."
"Honestly, it doesn't feel like you are."
"I'm here to guide you through the entire process so you can publish a bestselling novel." she grabbed the physical copy of the document I had shared with her last night. "This," she said while pointing at my work. "Is trash."
Out of shock, I let all the documents I was holding onto fall on the ground.
Surprisingly, Mrs. Jones did not seem to mind how I was feeling right now. I tried to come up with a response, but it seemed as if everything I said was reprehensible. She raised an eyebrow at me and then said; "Aren't you going to pick up the mess you made?"
Without saying anything back, I picked my paperwork from the ground.
"I think it's better if I go."
Once I had everything, I rushed to the door.
"Stop." Mrs. Jones spoke demandingly. "You can't back out like that."
I stood still and took a deep breath. I heard her standing up from her seat.
"The first drafts of your work are never perfect. It's scarcely possible to succeed at the beginning." she explained to me. This time she sounded nicer, but I didn't know for how long she was going to stay this calm. "Sit down, Liz."
For a second, I was debating whether to walk away or sit in front of her again. But I was here to chase my dreams. Even if she didn't behave like a mentor to me – at least I didn't think she did – it was too soon to call it quits.
"I'm not here to sugarcoat your writing." she started and then shoved the beginning of my story towards me. "You can't expect me to pretend what you've given me is good enough to be published."
"I don't like the way you talk to me."
"Unfortunately, you've to get used to it."
"How can you be so mean?"
"I'm helping you, Liz."
"It feels as if you're trying to make me feel like a failure."
"The more you work on your writing, the less bitter I will be." Mrs. Jones claimed. "Once your book is available for everyone, there'll be criticism – a lot. There is not one single writer who never had to endure the pain of reviews or comments on the internet. I'm here to make you tough."
I just shook my head. This entire situation didn't make sense to me. She wasn't going to make me tough by doing this. She was going to make me burst into tears if she'd continue so brutally.
"Do you think bestselling authors are consistently praised, Liz? No. Neither will anyone at this writing program - neither will you." she leaned back into her chair and kept looking at me. Then she waved me off with her left hand. "Throw this away and start over. The deadline is at 8 am this Friday."
Without anything else, she turned towards her laptop and began to reply to emails. I left her office and shut the door behind me.
A/N: I feel so sorry for Liz :( what do you think of Liz and Harry giving it a try? please leave a comment and your vote. stay safe and stay healthy. love you all. xo Lay