Already dark outside and he still paced around the house trying to figure out a way out of the mess that was installed in his life. Completely innocent of what Rafaela thought he had done, things felt even more wrong and stronger inside of him. He was paying for something he didn't do and wasn't even planning of doing it. Some part of him hated her so much that moment for not believing in him and letting go so fast as easily, the other part, and the bigger part, was trying to find a way out, trying to find a way to tell her she was wrong. He didn't want to live without her in his life, nothing made sense without her. James threw himself helpless on the couch for the million time that day and ran his fingers through his hair, pulling it back. Then he grabbed his cell and dialed her number, just like the rest of the day it skipped to the mailbox. Where the hell was she? He was getting worried.
"Rafi... it's me again. Please baby, please... it's a mistake... nothing ever happened between me and that woman. I love you. I would never do anything that could hurt us or push you away. Please... let's talk. Come home." He hung up and rested against the couch clueless of what to do. He couldn't just be there and do nothing... he got up and grabbed the keys of his jeep. He had to look for her and find her. "She can't be that far..." He muttered running towards his car. He would raid every little corner of San Francisco looking for her.
While driving he began to think of places where she could be, there were only two he could come up with first, and that was her parents or Kelly's. His first option revealed to be wrong. Not only her mother was surprised to see him as she didn't know where Rafaela was, nor did she know anything about what had happened. That was even more weird. If on one hand it made sense, for that would be the first place he'd look for her, on the other hand not saying anything not even where she was going made his mind twitch. What was she up to? After explaining things to Cynthia, he drove to Kelly's, he was quite sure he'd find her there.
"James!" Kelly exclaimed as she opened the door.
"Where is she?" James asked promptly and Kelly curled an eyebrow.
"Who?" She asked him. James pushed Kelly aside and invaded her house.
"Rafi!" He yelled. Kelly shut the door and looked at him astonished.
"She's not here. I thought she was in New York with you. What are you doing here? What the hell is happening?" James gave two huge steps towards Kelly and grabbed her arm strongly.
"I know you know where she is. Someone must know where she is, if her mother doesn't know, then you're the person she had to come up to." He spoke without pause, without breathing, nothing. Kelly knew right there something serious had happened.
"Calm down!" Kelly yelled at him. "I don't have a clue of what you are talking about. Rafi is not here James; I haven't seen or spoke to her today!"
"Oh God..." He whispered rubbing his hands on his face. That sounded a lot worse than he could ever imagine. "You're not lying to me are you Kel?" He asked then.
Kelly grabbed his arm and pulled him to the living room, making him sit. "No...James, I am not lying. Now want to explain what the hell happened. Why are you here and why is she not with you? Why are you looking for her?"
"Something so fucked up happened..." He shook his head. "She called me, and some bitch picked up the call, she was in my room and Rafi is assuming I was cheating on her with this woman. She didn't go to New York, and I would have come here right yesterday but I had a gig, so I only could come here today. I saw her by a lucky move at home, she had packed everything that was hers but apparently she left something behind and went there to grab it, that's when we saw each other. She broke up with me! She gave me her keys of the house and left."
Kelly rejoiced so much inside that moment, she thought she was not going to hold her happiness inside, but she controlled herself and then spoke. "So, some woman was answering her call on your cell phone and was in your room?" Kelly asked back and he could feel all the accusation tone on her voice.
"Yes! But it's not what she's thinking or you!" He pointed at her. "I never cheated on Rafi, never! And I didn't do it this time, this is a fucking mistake."
"Really James?" Kelly looked at him in the eye and James looked back at her resting his hands on his waist. He sighed. Kelly to believe him... him... the one that had cheated on her countless times. But she also knew when he was telling the truth.
"You know me Kel. You know me well enough... I am telling the truth. I never cheated on Rafi." He looked straight in her eyes saying so.
Kelly watched him for a few seconds, and she cursed him mentally. How she wanted that he would have done so, but she could tell he was innocent. She hated him even more, but she spoke. "You're fucked up James." She added. Knowing Rafaela well, it would be hard for him to explain things, even more because She was at a very bad place in her head. She had dropped the anti-anxiety pills and her head was down on a spiral.
"I know..." He said sitting back. "I knew right away what the consequences of that bitch's gesture were going to be. Rafi seems fine but she's not. Her head is a mess, everything that happens now is much bigger than it really is. See how she didn't think twice in leaving, though I know if I had cheated on her for real she would be this fast the same way."
"She just jumps to conclusions and then she doesn't listen." Kelly added. "I don't know where she is James and that is now concerning me." She pretended. She couldn't care less about her, but she had to pretend she did.
"I left her a dozen messages, she doesn't even turn her cell on, and if she did, she didn't care because she never called me back. I don't know what to do... she broke up with me for no reason, that's fucking unfair. I am her boyfriend, she must trust me, trust my word. I've never given her reasons not to trust me."
"Give her some time." Kelly suggested. "Sometimes all she needs is to cool down and she comes to her senses."
"I don't have time Kel. I am on tour; in two days I have to go back on tour. If I don't manage to deal with this in this period, this will be it. She will think that I cheated on her and then it will be too late to explain." Kelly almost smiled involuntary again. She was loving every single bit of it and this time she didn't do anything. It was all them alone.
"I wish I could help you." Kelly grabbed his hand to show support.
"I really thought she was here." He whispered looking around, completely lost for his last hope was gone. "I don't know what to do now... what the fuck do I do now?"
"I promise if I know anything I tell you." Kelly assured him.
She could make things worse for them. If Rafaela was out of sight, she didn't want to be found and if he found her things would turn even worse for them. She had to find her. She had to make her lose her mind for good. Rafaela would not take any pressure that moment and no one around her seemed to realize how badly she was mentally. With pressure she would blow away and Kelly wanted that.
Rafaela dropped her drained body on the bed of the hotel room. She wandered the streets of LA the whole afternoon, going into places she didn't know and bumping into strangers all the time. She had never been that lonely. Everything she cared for was lost. Her son was gone, her relationship was gone. For moments, she regretted she had left everything behind, she was sure it had been a bad move, at least, she should have stayed somewhere she could have a friendly stare and friendly words, but she knew James would chase her until she talked to him and she couldn't look at his face.
Tears fell down her face and she looked at the photograph she had taken with her, the only one. A photo of the three of them, smiling, happy, near Liam's school. She missed those days; she missed the days where she could smile without feeling guilty for not paying attention to her son. She was alone and she needed someone.
Rafaela got up and searched for her cell inside one of her bags and then turned it on. It began to beep as messages of James began to arrive. She stared at it with her finger ready to delete it, but she decided to listen to them. She listened to every message he had left her, while her shoulders shook, and tears didn't stop falling. Then, when done with all the listening, she began to delete them one by one, and finally she called Kelly.
"Rafi!" Kelly yelled on the other end. "Everyone's worried about you."
"I am fine." She said cleaning her eyes with the back of her hand.
"Where are you? James was here Rafi..." She began. Her second card was about to be played.
"James?" Rafaela asked.
"Yes. He was desperate looking for you. He thought you were here. Where are you?"
"You're not going to tell him where I am." Rafaela said firmly. "Promise me you won't, or I won't say a word Kelly."
"Tell me where you are. I promise I won't say a thing, just tell me where you are. I want to go there Rafi, please..."
"I'm in LA." Rafaela dropped the news.
"LA? What the fuck are you doing in LA? Did you really need to go that far to run away from him?" Kelly inquired her.
"It was a coincidence that turned out well. I had a job offer here to stay just a couple of time. I said no but then..." Rafaela sighed as she remembered the woman talking on James' cell.
"I know what happened." Kelly said. "Rafi, you have to talk to him. He swears nothing happened..."
"SHE WAS IN HIS ROOM!" Rafaela yelled. "What the fuck was a woman doing in his room? And how intimate are they that she feels free to answer his cell? Kelly... I am not stupid."
"James is a terrible liar Rafi. I've always known when he cheated on me because he couldn't even look in my eyes and due to that he always ended up confessing. That's why I knew something was going on with you, because when I asked him, he denied it, but he looked away. James is transparent and you should know that better than I do. He says nothing happened and I believe in him. You need to listen to him. Don't throw your relationship away just because of a misconstrued thing." Kelly smiled all happy.
"Can you come here?" Rafaela asked her. That was the main reason why she was calling her friend, because she needed someone with her.
"To LA?"
"Please Kelly. I need someone I know."
"God..." Kelly whispered. "I don't know Rafi. I have to find a flight..."
"Please..." Rafaela begged. "I am begging you."
Kelly stayed silent for a couple of time and then agreed. "Ok." She said thinking that moment no one was better than her to put some "sense" in Rafaela's head.
After talking to Kelly, she called her mother. They talked for a while and Cynthia gave her the same advices Kelly did. There Rafaela began to realize there was more in her decision than just the suspicion of James cheating, still she decided not to explain further why she decided to leave, nevertheless, she would have stayed if that hadn't happened. Finally, with all her phone calls done, she turned the cell off, but she stared at it. Despite all, her heart was aching, she loved him, she loved him still. Rafaela took a deep breath and held the phone that was on the nightstand, the phone of the hotel room and dialed one last number.
When he heard his cell ringing, James ran to it. A strange number was showing.
"Hello?" He said.
Rafaela held the phone tightly in her hand, squeezing it and tears fell when she heard his voice.
"Hello?" James insisted but there was nothing he could hear apart from someone breathing heavily. "Rafi?" He whispered and she took a hand to her mouth to muffle the sob that escaped her throat. "Rafi is that you?" She still said nothing. "Baby... it's a mistake baby. I didn't do anything sweetie. I love you. Where are you?" He said, and she slowly put the phone down, next thing James heard the beep of dead call.
"FUCK!" He yelled frustrated, but he remembered the number that he was saw on his display. He could find out where she was through that number, and he searched for it. He was writing the address down when his cell rang again, it was Kelly.
"James?" Kelly said.
"Kelly... I know where she is." He said.
"LA." Kelly said.
"Yes, she called me from her hotel room. She's in LA."
"She asked me not to tell you, but I got us two tickets in a plane tomorrow morning." She informed. That would be it. She would break them up forever.
"Oh Kelly... I can't thank you enough." He breathed.
"She's going to kill me. She asked me not to tell you anything, but I can't do that. I think you two need to talk."
"Thank you again." He said.
"Meet me at the airport at 10 am sharp. Don't be late, you hear me?" She said.
"I won't."