Kelly
Monday, May 6
"I'm finished eating mommy."
"Good job baby." I replied to Kiara, grabbing her plate and empty cup of juice so they could be washed.
"Can I ask you something?"
"Of course."
"When are you gonna let daddy off his time out? It's been days!"
I had to be very careful when I explained this situation to her. I didn't wanna scare her, so I just told her Trey was on 'time out' and would come back once he 'learned his lesson.' I tried to water it down as much as possible so she wouldn't think the worst, but then again, she's a smart kid so she's bound to catch on at some point.
"Not quite yet."
"But don't you miss him? Don't you want him to come back?"
"Well to be honest sweetie, it's not about if I want him to come back, it's if I'm ready for him to come back."
"When will you be ready?"
"When I feel like I can be in the same room as him without getting upset."
She frowned, "What does that mean...?"
I stopped what I was doing and turned to look at her so she could have my undivided attention.
"Listen baby. Your dad and I love each other very much, and that's never gonna change. But unfortunately there will be times when we won't see eye to eye. It's human nature to get mad at someone we love sometimes. It's like when you get mad at Blue or Royalty, or even when you get mad at me and daddy when you don't like one of our rules. You following me?"
"Kinda."
"Well," I continued, "Sometimes it's best to have some space when you're mad at that person. It's not that I hate your dad or don't wanna be with him, but I just need to take some time to let the anger die down instead of letting it build up."
"So when you're done being mad at him, you'll let him come back?"
"Yes, I guess you can say that." I said, forcing a smile. "One thing I know for sure though? We both love you to pieces."
"Will y'all still love me once the baby gets here?"
"Of course babygirl, why would you think otherwise?"
"I dunno, just wondering."
"Kiki, you're my first born. You'll always be special to me no matter what. How could I ever stop loving you? You're just like me, and I love myself so..."
"Seriously mommy?" she giggled.
"Okay but really," I laughed, "You're sweet, kind and caring, but you're also a diva and you're hilarious. Yes the baby's gonna need a lot of attention when it gets here, but that's not gonna take away from the love me and your father have for you. Got it?"
She nodded, "Got it."
"Now come here and gimme a kiss."
She ran up to me and I bent down to her level so she could kiss me.
"You ready to go?" I asked.
"Yeah, can I use the bathroom first?"
"Go right ahead."
As I poured myself a cup of coffee while waiting for her, I heard the front door open and close. I assumed it was either Lala or Bey coming to check on me, so I didn't really think much of it. That was until he appeared into the kitchen.
He stood there looking at me for a second before speaking. "Good morning."
"Hi." I mumbled.
"You look nice."
"I'm wearing a sweatsuit."
"And? It doesn't matter what you wear, you always look nice."
"Hm."
"How you doing?"
I rolled my eyes, unamused by this small talk. "Did you need something Tremaine?"
"Can I take Kiara to school?"
"Sure. She's ready but she's in the bathroom right now. You could've just texted me, by the way."
"Yeah but I wanted to see you."
"Cute."
He sighed, "Kelz how long are you gonna keep this up?"
"I need my space." I answered indirectly.
"Baby this has gone on long enough. Whatever lesson you're trying to teach me or whatever point you're trying to make, I get it."
"No, you don't get it!" I replied, my voice raising a little bit. "It's not only about teaching you a lesson, it's also about me and how I feel. This is for my own sanity. I can't even look at you without getting pissed off cause all I can think about is how you betrayed me. I can't have that type of energy in this house."
"That hurts, Kelz."
"That hurts?! You know what really hurts, Tremaine? Having a husband who feels like he has to sneak around and do something behind my back instead of simply talking to me about it! What happened to feeling like you can tell me anything, like you said on our anniversary? Was that all a lie?"
"No, of course not! That was the truth and you know it. I just know how you get whenever Janay's name is mentioned and I didn't wanna start an argument so I never brought her situation up."
"For three months though?! Three months you've kept this from me and you never realized it was wrong?! You smiled in my face during all those FaceTime calls, came to surprise me and everything, and the whole time you was doing this shit on the side! You didn't even feel any type of shame until it started blowing up in your face."
"That's not true..."
"It is true! Just admit that you didn't start to feel guilty about this until I told you I was pregnant."
He just stood there stumped, not knowing what to say.
"Yeah, that's what I thought."
"Kelly I swear none of this was an intention to hurt you. I didn't think —"
"Exactly. You didn't think." I interrupted. I started to walk away from him but then he grabbed onto my arm.
"Baby I don't wanna fight. Just tell me whatever you need me to do and I'll do it."
"Well right now, I need you to let go of me."
"Kelendria."
"Tremaine. Unless you want your fingers chopped off, let go of my arm."
Kiara came out of the bathroom literally just in time.
"Daddyyyyy!" she screamed as soon as she spotted Trey.
"Hey Keeks!" he said, matching her excitement. He opened his arms and she jumped into them.
"Are you coming back?" she asked innocently.
"Uh... not yet babygirl. I'm just here to take you to school."
"Oh, okay..."
"Her bag's over there." I mumbled, pointing toward the kitchen counter.
"Say bye to your mother." he said to her after grabbing her backpack.
"See ya later mommy." she said, reaching forward to give me a hug and kiss.
"Love you baby, be good."
"Love you too. Yes ma'am."
I watched them walk away as tears threatened to escape my eyes. This was so fucking hard, but I had to stand my ground.
Trey
"You okay back there, Keeks? You've been real quiet."
I looked at her through the rear view mirror and noticed that she was sitting there staring out the window with a frown on her face.
"What's wrong?" I asked.
"I heard you and mommy when I was in the bathroom." she mumbled.
I cursed under my breath and gripped the steering wheel tighter. "What exactly did you hear?"
"I couldn't really hear the words, but I know mommy was yelling at you."
"Aw baby, why you ain't say nothing?"
"I didn't wanna make things worse..." she said quietly.
"You could never make anything worse. And you weren't supposed to hear us arguing, so I wanna apologize for that."
"What did you do that was so bad?"
I sighed, "Well, your mother found out that I was doing something without telling her and she's not too happy about it."
"What was it?"
"I don't think you need to know." I replied honestly. "But just know that it might take a little while for her to forgive me."
"Are you guys gonna break up?" she asked, her voice cracking.
Fuck.
"No Keeks, we are not. Yes I made a mistake and yes it hurt her feelings, but it's not enough for us to get to that point."
"But she sounded so mad..."
"You know your mom is a drama queen." I said jokingly. "Not that I don't deserve it though, because I do."
I looked through the rear view mirror again and my heart damn near broke seeing her tear-stained face. I can't take this shit, man.
"Kiara please don't cry. I'm gonna fix this."
"You promise?"
"Yes, I promise. Now I don't know how long it's gonna take, but you have my word that everything will be back to normal."
I'm saying all of this with so much confidence, yet I feel like I'm lying to her because in reality I'm starting to lose hope.
Kelly
"Girl what is this depressing ass music you got playing?" I heard Solange say as her and Bey walked into my kitchen. I found myself cooking a lot lately. It's a combination of me keeping myself busy and always being hungry.
"Hello to you too." I mumbled.
They hugged me then proceeded to go snoop on my phone.
"No you do not have a 'Niggas Ain't Shit' playlist!" Beyoncé exclaimed.
"Wow Kelz." Solange laughed. "Toni Braxton, Mary J. Blige, Monica, Rihanna... oh my gosh, Bey look! She got 'Me Myself and I', 'Resentment' and 'Sorry' up in here!"
"Oh it's plenty more, keep scrolling." I replied.
"This a whole different type of petty." Bey said to me.
"You know what, I feel like I'm being judged." I chuckled. "What y'all doing here anyway?"
"We found three candidates for Michelle and we wanna know what you think!" Solange said excitedly.
"Eh... I'm not really feeling that anymore. Y'all have fun though."
"Oh helllllll no. We're not about to do this." Bey said.
"What?" I groaned.
"Don't be a party pooper! This was your idea in the first place. I know you had a rough week but I'm not letting you back out of this."
"Well Bey if my head's not in it then how do you expect me to be helpful?"
"Honestly, just let me beat Tremaine's ass." Solange interjected.
"Absolutely not." Bey replied quickly.
"It ain't up to you, it's up to Kelly." Solo said, turning to me. "Just say the word sis."
I shook my head, laughing a little, "No Solo. If anyone's gonna beat his ass, it's gonna be me."
"Ughhh. You won't let me fight him nor will you help us with Michelle's men. What did we even come here for?"
"I'm asking myself the same question." I joked.
"Rude!"
"Look, I'll tell ya what. As long as you promise not to hurt my man, I'll help you find Michelle's."
"Oh look at you, still claiming him." Beyoncé smirked.
I rolled my eyes, "I mean it is what it is. I love the nigga, I just don't like him at the moment."
"I wanna talk some shit so bad right now, but lemme just keep my thoughts to myself." Solange mumbled.
"Yeah, bite ya tongue and pull up the pictures of these men before I change my mind."
She mean mugged me before pulling out her phone and going to her camera roll.
"Here's contestant number one."
"His name is Peter. He's an aspiring actor."
"Hm, interesting..." I said slowly while examining his picture thoroughly. "Who's next?"
"Here's contestant number two."
"His name is Anthony. He works in the music industry."
"He bald."
Solange sucked her teeth, "Your ex was bald so you can't even judge. And Chad was bald too."
"Alright alright, you got a point." I admitted. "Show me the third one."
"His name is Kevin. He's a fitness trainer."
"Okay then..." I said, nodding approvingly. "Y'all didn't do too bad. Watcha thinking? Got any favorites?"
"Bey likes the first guy, I like the second guy. We need you to be our tiebreaker." Solo replied.
"But uh, what if I told you I like the third guy?"
"Oh come on!" she groaned.
"And just like that, we're back at square one." Bey said.
"Well looks aren't everything right? How bout we have Michelle go out with all three of them to see who she vibes with the best." I suggested.
"Oh shit, why didn't we think of that?" Solo mumbled.
"See, that's why I'm usually the one who's in charge of this. Y'all be tryna play me but this is my specialty." I chuckled.
"I guess so." Bey said, shrugging then smiling. "Glad to have you back, Kelz."
"Oh I never left, honey."
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