21
maybe
slamming doors, breaking things, unbearable yells were always heard in this house.
this isn't the relationship we had when we met.
the longer it is, the worst it gets.
he's not good at controlling his temper which always end us having a big argument. he'll get mad at small things and take it out on me, i don't want this anymore. loving him isn't an enough reason for me to stay.
"i don't like you staying out late so come home early." he fixed his tie and maybe waiting for my response.
i just rolled my eyes and quickly went outside the mansion.
"where are you going?" he yelled but it didn't stop me from running away. he didn't chase me which is a relief but i know it won't be as soon as i get home later.
messages and messages for every minute is what i am receiving while doing my work. i have no better option than to turn my cellphone off.
after how many hours, i decided to take a break as i massaged the back of my neck in frustration. i can't focus on my work especially now that i'm thinking about leaving him. even if i don't want to, i had to.
"is there anything wrong?" i opened my eyes in shock, sitting up straight when i heard a man's voice.
"nothing, i'm good. thank you for asking," giving him a fake smile. i'm not in the mood to break down here and explain what happened when i don't even know where to start.
"okay. if you need something, just knock on my office." he left and checked the other employees. i opened my phone and saw tons of messages from him.
why the fuck are you ignoring me?
let's talk when you get home.
i didn't want to read any of the other messages so i just turned it off, inhaling and exhaling deeply. all i wanna do now is to focus finishing my work before jimin gets mad at me for coming home late. i don't want another argument, it's exhausting.
my mind just can't focus on what i'm doing, it keeps coming back on jimin. his painful words and how we changed when we moved in, i just wished that i can turn back the time and hoped that none of this happened.
"hey y/n," my boss called as i looked up at him with questioning eyes.
"i know there's something wrong, do you want to talk about it?" sighing in defeat, no matter how i sugarcoat it, it still looks that something's bothering me.
"how about you finish your work so that you can leave early and have a dinner with me outside?" he suggested which definitely sounds like not a great idea especially with jimin's attitude, he'll probably think that i'm cheating on him once he finds out.
"take that heavy pain out of your heart, you need to."
it's starting to get dark and i'm about to finish my work. i ended up agreeing with my boss, he's right. i need to. i've been carrying this pain ever since it started.
"do you want to leave him?" i stopped slicing my steak, gulping at his question.
"i actually don't want to and he wants to talk to me once i got home," he took a sip on his champagne and looked at me.
"i don't even know if the talk he's talking about will actually be a normal talk because we both know it'll end up as an argument," i just shrugged.
without even noticing the time, it was great talking to someone about my problem. it lessen the pain i am feeling as he gave me few advises.
"do you want me to take you home?"
"oh, no, no, no, no."
"oh, i know why. anyway, take care and think about of what i said." he waved at me before driving away.
distance yourself from him or directly leave him, that's what he said.
sighing, i don't know if either of the two is what i can do.
"why are you late?" i massaged the back of my neck and removed my heels, ignoring him.
"y/n. why are you late?" hearing each of his fingers pop, i know he's getting impatient.
i just went upstairs and changed into some comfy clothes.
"don't you think i won't find out?" anger rushed in his veins as i watched his chest go up and down.
"find out what?" i asked blankly, knowing it's another argument for this night.
"you're cheating on me?"
"with who? and why would i do that?"
"because i'm not enough for you? because you're tired with our relationship?" his hand doing its thing while he talks.
"i never cheated on you and i have no plan in doing so. but yes, i am tired of everything that's going on between us!"
"aren't you tired, jimin? there's not even a day where we acted like a normal couple," i stood up and he knows what i'm about to do.
"so now you're leaving me?"
"fine, just leave." hearing those words come out from his mouth hurted me inside out but it didn't stopped me from packing my things.
the door slammed.
that is our last argument.
there are times where he would call me and ask me to come back but i answered neither of them. i'm ignoring him until now and i heard that he's not attending any of his board meetings. he would most of the time cancel it and spend his day drinking alcohols inside his mansion or even go to clubs to get wasted.
i'll be better for you, i promise. just one more chance, y/n. please.
"you ready?" my friend asked as the bouncer opened the door for us. i nodded, the loud noise is only heard inside the club.
surprisingly, people around us only wears red, white and black no other than that. my eyebrows knotted and we stopped walking, my friend told the bartender what are we going to drink as we patiently waited for it to be served.
not that i care but i'm only curious, i asked her about the color that the people were wearing tonight.
"oh, don't you know any about this club? they dress, we rather, dress according to... wait," she chuckled and grabbed a piece of paper from her wallet and gave it to me.
people who wears black were in a complicated relationship, white is for those people who are broken hearted and unfortunately for me who's wearing a red tight dress besides has no idea with the twist that this club has, red is for those people who are single.
"is this for real?" the bartended served our drink as she thanked him, bringing back her attention to me.
"yes? that's why i'm wearing white, my ex dumped me, remember?" she drank the strong alcohol.
"i forgot to tell you about this club. why do you look like you just commited a crime?" she rolled her eyes and grabbed the paper from my hand, crumpling it.
"don't tell me you aren't single because you are already," i just rolled my eyes at her and drank the alcohol.
"good evening everyone, having a great time?" the loud song faded away as we payed attention to the person standing on the stage with the microphone in front of him.
"i-is that y-your ex?" i'm totally confused right now, jimin's wearing black instead of red.
"y/n?" we're both shocked as i slowly looked at him but he changed the subject. the music started playing, the girls couldn't stop flirting with him but his eyes were on me.
my knees almost gave up as soon as i heard his voice.
the truth untold.
"but i still want you," my heart broke more than ever when our eyes met.
didn't even noticed that the song was about to end, the people especially the girls clapped the loudest that they can to get his attention but he quickly went down.
"y/n," she repeatedly called my name and widened her eyes to tell me that jimin is on his way to me.
"y/n," it isn't her anymore. it's already jimin who called me.
"can we talk? please?" i smiled fakely, finally looking at him.
"uhm, sure." i followed him outside the club as their eyes also followed us.
"so what are we going to talk about?"
"why are you wearing red? you aren't single," i couldn't tell if it's anger, sadness or both is what i'm seeing on his eyes.
"jimin, i am already. we broke up months ago. besides, i don't know any about this club."
"i just gave you some time to think, none of us said that we broke up months ago." he protested, i just sighed.
"oh, so you want one of us to say that it's finally over? fine, i'll be the one."
"we're over, okay? we're done." i am about to walk away when he grabbed my wrist.
"i love you, y/n and i'm sorry for what happened. please," he begged but i pulled my wrist.
"if it's meant to be jimin, it'd be. if not, then you need to let go." cause i did but i know deep inside of me, it's still you. i went inside the club and looked for my friend who's now drinking a lot.
with my vision blurry, head dizzy, i passed out.
head ache woke me up as i realized i am laying on a comfy bed with a heavy yet soft blanket above my body.
"why am i here?" i sat down, i distance myself from jimin who's sitting in front of me.
"you and your friend passed out in the club. luckily, we're there to take care of you before any of the guys in the club do anything with you," he answered.
"where is she?"
"the boys took her home safely and she just texted me a while ago and thanked me."
the both of us became silent as i remembered every detail of our arguments happened in this room and this is where we argued one last time before i left this place.
"go downstairs and eat your breakfast, your medicine is also there." he stood up and left the room.
i'm feeling different, he isn't like this before i left him. he seems different. but i'm not yet so sure.
i went downstairs and just like he said, my food is ready and the medicine is just right beside it.
he let me eats while he told me he's going out for a while to pick up something. once i finished putting the plates that i used in the sink, he came back.
"here are your clothes and everything you needed. i asked your friend to help me get those," my head ache is killing me so i just grabbed it from his hands and went upstairs to have a nice warm bath.
i just can't stop thinking how different it feels not hearing him raise his voice at me or whatever that i got used to in our past.
finishing my morning routine, i went downstairs with all the things that i own.
"where are you going?" he asked as soon as i reached the door.
"leaving."
"why?"
"jimin, i told you. we're over and if you want me to thank you for taking care of me, then thank you." he stood up from his seat and came closer to me.
"but please, i have to leave."
"you don't have to thank me for taking care of you. that's not what i want." my eyebrows knotted.
"what i want is for you to come back, y/n." i shook my head when he said that sentence.
"i know it's sounds insane-"
"it definitely does."
"but listen,"
"i want to be the man that you deserve." no matter how much sincerity i can see in his eyes, it still doesn't convince me.
"you didn't proved that to me when we're still together!"
"that's why i want you to give me another chance. i'll make things right." i shook my head and i can tell he's about to cry. holy shit.
"please. i don't want to see you with someone else." he bit his bottom lip and ran his fingers through his hair and tilted his head backward.
he's now crying. that's for sure.
when he looked at me, his eyes are red. i just felt like my heart being pulled out.
"just one more chance, y/n."
"jimin, we're not sure if it's going to work."
"maybe it will, this time."
-
boy with luv, i swear i'm shaking & i can't even breathe. holy shit, i'm so proud of our boys sksksksks jimin's really snatching me from them with those smile and moves sksksksks just wanna post it bc i'll be watching the mv all over again asdfghjkl
who's ur bias btw?
04/12/19