Roger POV
I don't remember a lot after seeing Hannah basically shut down in front of me. The next thing I remembered was being a my apartment and having a mental breakdown.
I walked inside my room and screamed. "Why?" I couldn't hold it in. I just lost everything. My everything because I just couldn't speak or move. "I'm pathetic." I yelled grabbing the coffee mac and throwing it across the room. I was so angry. I forgot I had this kind of anger. Hannah kept me in check when I was mad.
I grabbed a photo in a frame. Before I threw it I saw myself in the mirror. My face all red and baci. "What the fuck is my problem?" I asked myself. I looked at the photo. It was of me and Hannah in front of Big Ben. She was so happy and was kissing my cheek. My heart sank. "Hannah..." I said aloud hugging it. "I just want to tell you the truth." I placed the photo down.
Slowly walking to my bed I grabbed my box of cigarettes. "It's all my fault." I said lighting it and taking a hit. Brian walked came to the apartment. "Roger?" He said noticing me. "Yeah?" I said my voice cracking from crying. "Dude what happened?" He asked with a concerned voice. I offered him cigarette but he declined. "I fucked up?" "But how? Tell me." He said noticing the broken coffee pot. "Um did you break the coffee machine ." He was upset but wasn't freaking out. "Yeah I'm sorry I'll pay you back." I choked out.
He gave me a hug and walked to the couch and getting a blanket. "Good night Brian." I smirked.
Trying to be just a little happy.
I climbed out of my window and climbed on to the roof. I light another cigarette. "Roger why didn't you? Why didn't you just push her off you?" I questioned. I took a hit and stared at the sky. "Tonight was supposed to be special. Besides fucking I was gonna give her the promise ring."
I looked out at the city. The lights were beautiful. Not as beautiful as Hannah though. I felt numb. Like every feeling I've ever had was gone. I didn't like this feeling.