Sometimes letting go leaves you with an opportunity to gain something better.
"I'm home!" I call through the house as Claire comes running up to me. I give her a hug and close the front door, keeping the cold out. I lift her up in my arms and drop my bag on the couch. "How was your day at school today?" I ask her.
"It was fun! I got to go outside and play on the swings!"
"Really? That sounds fun! I'm jealous," I say as she tells me more about her day. Austin comes downstairs.
"Hey. Pizza's in the kitchen if you're hungry. How was work?" Claire gets up from my lap and I walk into the kitchen to get dinner.
"The same as it is every day," I say. "Anything new happen at your job?" I ask. I decide not to tell him about meeting One Direction, much less getting Niall's number. Austin's a bit overprotective. Who can blame him?
"Nope," he says. My phone lights up with a new message.
Nialler: Hey there :)
I smile and text back.
Me: Hey! Thought you weren't gonna text me...
I look up to see Austin staring at me. "What?" I ask self-conciously.
"Who was that? You're smiling like an idiot."
"That was...Rebecca." He gives me a suspicious look.
"Okay then. I'm going to bed. Goodnight sis," he says, giving me a hug and then taking Claire upstairs with him to tuck her in. I finish my slice of pizza.
Nialler: Why wouldn't I text you? If you're free tomorrow we should hang out.. xx
Me: Yeah I'm free. What time?
Nialler: Starbucks at noon sound good?
Me: Sounds great :) See you then! Gnite Nialler xx
Nialler: Gnite Alex :) can't wait to see you xx
I smile and lock my phone. I turn off all the lights on my way upstairs. I change into pajamas and plug my phone into my charger, then sit in bed and think about today. Niall clearly is flirting with me. I don't know if I'm ready for another boyfriend after what happened. I mean, it's been three years. I should move on. I can't move on. Jake died for me! He gave his life to protect me! I sigh and hug my stuffed pig tight.
Most kids get rid of their stuffed animals over time, selling them at garage sales and giving them to younger cousins or siblings, but I kept all mine. They remind me of when I was little and how much simpler life was. I keep them all lined up on my bed. A lot of them have stories behind them too. My stuffed pig, Pinky, was given to me by my dad when I turned 8. My stuffed purple frog, Momo, was given to me by Jake on Valentines day. Zingo my stuffed tiger Austin gave to me when I was sick with a cold. I had a little yellow duck named Mr. Ducky (I know, creative) that Claire gave to me for Christmas one year. I also had a little stuffed Crush the sea turtle from the movie Finding Nemo. Rebecca gave it to me as a Christmas present last year based off my favorite movie and my favorite animal. I had tons of stuffed toys, each of them with history behind how I got it. So I keep them all.
I fall asleep with Pinky in my arms.
We're running through a field. A grassy field with white flowers surrounding us. Our fingers are intertwined as we run around like children. "I love you Lexi," he says kissing my nose.
"I love you too Jake," I say, kissing him fully on the lips. Suddenly, the grass turns from bright green to dark brown. The flowers all die. The ground slowly starts to form a black hole leading to nothing but darkness. The ground changes beneath Jake and he slips into the hole. I grab his hand before he falls. "No!" His brown eyes stare into my blue ones.
"You have to let go Lexi," he says calmly.
"I'm not letting go!" I cry. "I'm not going to lose you again!" He laughs softly.
"Lexi, I'm already gone. You need to let me go," he says, his voice fading as he slips from my grasp like butter and falls right into the pit of darkness.
"JAKE!" I sit up in bed, my breathing heavy. Another dream. More like a nightmare this time. I check the clock and see it's almost 4:30 in the morning. Great. What did he mean? 'I'm already gone, you need to let me go'? To me it made no sense.
I grab my guitar and play Miss You by Ed Sheeran as I cry my eyes out, just like every night. I play a few more songs and after a few hours pass I hear someone at my door. "You should take that talent to the stage." I jump and turn around to see Austin standing in my doorway, smiling at me.
"You scared me," I say.
"I know. You're really good."
"You've told me before," I mumble.
"Yeah but you never do anything to let other people hear you."
"Well sorry. It's not something that I like to show off." He rolls his eyes. "Did I wake you up again?" I ask, feeling guilty.
"Sorta. I have work today anyway so I might as well stay up."
"It's Saturday," I point out, frowning. He shrugs.
"What can I do? It’s my job.” I sigh and put my guitar on its stand.
"So...Claire's with me today?" I ask, hoping the answer would be no but also knowing it would be yes. I love Claire, but today I was supposed to meet with Niall. I don't know if he's seeing it as a date or what but either way I don't think bringing Claire is the best thing. I hope it's not a date. We're just hanging out right? Friends.
"Is that a problem?"
"Well I had some plans, but it's no big deal. I'll bring her with me." He looks at me.
"Plans with who?" I bite my lip.
"A friend I met at work," I say. I wasn't lying. We met at my job.
"Really?" I nod. "What's this friend’s name?"
"Why does that matter?!" I snap. He gives me a look. I sigh. "I'm sorry. His name is Niall."
"His name?" he asks surprised.
"I can have guy friends," I say, a bit annoyed. He waits a moment before saying anything else.
"Just be careful, Lex." With that he walks out. I take a deep breath and head to the shower.
There's nothing to be careful about. We're friends.
AUTHORS NOTE
CHAPTER 2 :D oohhhh shnap someones a bit unsure of Niall O_o its okayy Austin ERRYBODY LUVS NIALL! hahaha COMMENT please? it doesnt have to be long but i need to know if i should keep writing this. and vote cuz they make me happy :) Ever notice how my little inspirational quote things at the very beginning in bold usually have something to do with the chapter or story? ;D PAY ATTENTION MY POPTARTS. Like her dream?? letting go?? get it? No? FIGURE IT OUT. hehehe im sorry im so mean. btw they arent my quotes i find them on google x) #SmartCookie The pic on the side is Austin. ED SHEERANS A BOSS. okay thats all i have to say
:-) <<< that smiley has a nose. alright BYE.