It's hard to believe that an object so small can produce a devastating consequence if misused. Two weeks later and I can still feel the round, hard shape of the gun's barrel pressed firmly against my back in warning. I'll find myself reaching towards my back, expecting to feel the gun to realize once and for all that I'm not entirely safe as I thought I was. I still can't wrap my mind around the fact that something so small can hold your life on a thin string. No amount of action movies can prepare you for the harsh reality of life or death.
"Zada? Zada!" I snap back from my regular dazes to my own reality. I slowly turn my head to the direction of my name being call to see Charlie staring at me in worry. "Are you alright?" he asks, hesitantly, afraid that if he makes any sudden movements, I might break. It sure feels like that.
Maybe that's why I agreed to coming with Charlie for some little R&R to the mall.
"Ah," I realize that I'm clenching my fork tightly in my hand that my skin has turning an awfully shade of white. I release my hold carefully, not wanting to strain my muscles too much. My fingers shake from the hold and I accidentally let go of the fork, watching it as it falls on top of my chocolate orange cheese cake.
Now, instead of looking fresh and untouched, my desert appears to have been given a new role as a beach chair for my fork.
"I'm completely fine. Just overwhelmed of how delicious this cheese caked looks." I answer, a little too cheerfully than I wanted to sound like.
Charlie nods his head, giving me a questionable look. "It sure looked appetizing a second ago. You know, the fork's not made of silver. There's no need to hold on to it as if you're life depends on it."
Shamefully, I hide my unsteady hands underneath the table and place them on my lap. I try to relax my arms but my hands continue to shake. I attempt to laugh but it sounds more like a desperate release of air. Any laugh in the world can't sound any faker than that. "You're right... I got entranced by the beautiful design of the fork that I got scared I might ruin it." I explain, using the first excuse that came to mind.
"Right..." Charlie replies slowly, glance down at the fork that's resting on my cake. I glance down with him to find that the fork is completely plain with no beautiful design whatsoever.
Oops
Charlie crosses his arms over his chest, his cup of earl grey tea already empty. "You wanna tell me what's going on with you?" He asks straight up.
I blink a few times from shock. "Um...what do you mean?"
Charlie rolls his eyes, "don't mistake me for a dumbass, Zada. I can tell when something is wrong with my friends."
I only stare at Charlie with wide eyes, not knowing if I'm more surprised that I'm hearing him swear for the first time and, with his accent, makes the swear sound elegant or that Charlie is genuinely concerned about me. I can feel the blood rushing to my cheeks, warming them up from embarrassment. "Nothing is wrong. Life's great," I tell him stiffly, not wanting to admit the opposite.
Charlie gives me a stern look, not wanting to drop the subject. "Then why have you been avoiding everyone but me."
Instantly, I scoff. "I haven't been avoiding anyone. You must be imagining things."
"Enough with the nonsense Zada. I haven't seen you with that girl, what was her name again?" Charlie asks, frustrated.
"Bailey," I sigh.
"Yes, her. Whenever you see her, you automatically walk in the opposite direction from her." Charlie stubbornly ventures further into the topic I don't want to discuss. "And then there's Castellano." Charlie adds.
I can't help myself, I gulp nervously.
"If you notice that guy, you automatically run away from him as if he has contracted a deadly virus making you want to get as far away from his as possible," Charlie elaborates, never dropping his scrutinizing gaze from me. I squirm in my seat from his stare. "So, why did you kick those two out of your life?"
I fidget with my fingers, completely lost at this point. I mean, what am I supposed to tell him?
Turns out that the mystery girl who interrupted our soccer convo knows how to wield a gun. I got to witness her skills first hand. Oh, and so did Chasity, lol!
That would definitely cause Charlie to question my sanity.
So not happening.
A loud BANG suddenly explodes to my right. I flinch, instinctively cowering away from the sound, remembering my situation with that black haired girl and Chasity. Words can't even begin to describe the amounts of fearful thoughts speeding through my head that day as that gunshot filled the atmosphere with unbearable tension. I stayed frozen in place as I heard a thud, indicating that someone has fallen.
I recall dread consuming me in less than a second as I feared for the worse only to have that dread disappear a second later when I heard Chasity warning me to not turn around yet.
That gunshot still echos in my ears sometimes that's why the loud bang scared the peepers out of me but that doens't stop my head from turning towards the origin of the sound. I look to my right to see that a waitress has accidentally dropped her serving plate which contained a few empty glasses. Those glasses shattered across the floor.
There's my opportunity to avoid Charlie's intervention!
I begin to stand up to go help the embarrassed waitress but some other customers nearby have beat me to it. It would be unnecessary for me to go over to them and offer more help. Sadly, they go it covered.
Flying donkeys! Now how can I escape?!
"Zada, I'm waiting," Charlie calmly reminds me.
I sink back into my chair.
How can I begin to explain, what seems to be the most horrifying moment of my life. The shooting back at the cabin over the holidays doesn't seem to compare. Sure, I got shot and fell down the stairs but it was very sudden. The entire moment lasted a few seconds until I was knocked out cold.
But the incident after school that Wednesday? I had to walk for, what felt like, fifteen excruciating minutes with a pistol on my back, reminding me constantly of my fragile life. At the time, I was concerned for not only my life but Chasity's. I forgot then that she has the capability to handle those types of situations.
Chasity is a superhero who made sure I was turned around when she took the life of the girl who threatened to take our own.
I have contacts who will come to take care of the body. Don't speak of this to anyone, Zada. Not even to Reece.
That was all Chasity said before she used her strength to pull my shaking form back up on my feet and forced me to walk away from the crime scene with her.
I haven't slept decently these past two weeks. I have avoided Reece, Bailey, Cameron, and Chasity, especially, at school. I make sure to walk into Bio class right when it starts and be the first one to leave. I take a longer route to a farther subway station so I don't run into anyone familiar.
Overall, let's just say I'm not handling the aftermath too well.
"...I didn't kick them out," I softly answer, deciding to walk along a thin line between more lies and the truth. Out of everything that has happened, I haven't kicked Charlie out of my life and I can't jeopardize this friendship I have with him.
I don't want to be alone and Charlie is the most closest thing to normal I have. I need to cling onto that.
"So not talking to them for these past two weeks is not classified as kicking them out? What is this? A long distance friendship?" Charlie exclaims.
I can't hide the guilt from my face. Of course it makes sense that I'm avoiding Reece. I'm not ready for his rejection and Chasity is his girlfriend so, for Reece, it makes sense why I'd avoid her too.
But Bailey? I was so scared that I'd accidentally bring her into this mess that I subconsciously pushed her away without giving her an explanation.
I want to face palm myself so hard right now at my idiocy. Bailey must think, correction: she has every right to think, I'm a complete stinkin' scoundrel.
I'm the worst friend in the history of horrible pals.
I have to make it up to her and fast. If this were a school day, I would run away from Charlie's detective mode back to school, fall down on my knees, and beg Bailey for forgiveness.
But I can't do that and maybe that's good that I can't. It just means that what little left of my dignity can be spared.
Then I realized I still haven't answered Charlie's question. "I need some space," I lamely answer him, giving Charlie enough information without breaking my promise to Chasity about not speaking a word on what exactly happened.
"Why on Earth would you need some space?" Charlie asks, yet again.
I would have groaned in annoyance if I didn't come up with the most brilliant response. "I'm going through one of my mood swings because of mother nature's monthly gift, you know? This time it's lasting longer then usual and I've only been able to keep my unstable hormones under control around you because you're always a gentlemen...until now."
None of what I just said was the truth. My time of the month has already past but desperate times called for desperate measures. Judging by Charlie's horrified expression, I think my genius plan worked. The British guy looks like I told him my imaginary poodle has passed away. Not the reaction I was going for but it will work.
"Zada, I'm so sorry. I was being inconsiderate and-" Charlie wants to go on with his heart filled speech but I interrupt him because if he continued, I'd most likely admit I was lying.
"Buddy, it's cool. You didn't know." Charlie's expression still doesn't cheer up so I come up with a new plan to get that smile back on his adorable face and to also prolong this day. "I have a way to make it up to you."
"You don't have to make it up to m-" Again, I interrupt the guy by raising my hand at the waitress by the till and yelling out:
"Check, please!"
=====* * *=====
"You brought me down to an Arcade?" Charlie asks, not bothering to hide his skepticism.
While he looks worried and confused, I look happy and stoked. I could have squealed like a little girl if I didn't remember that Charlie is with me instead of Reece.
"This place is fun! Come on, I'll prove it to you!" I exclaim and drag him by the arm to the nearest arcade game which happens to be none other than...
"Pac-man," Charlie says, reading the name on the arcade machine out loud while squinting his eyes to read the neon yellow letters. "Arcades still have this game?"
"Of course, it's a classic and one of the only machines here that is always available." I tell him as I reach into my sweater pocket for a quarter.
"Why is it always available if it's a classic?" Charlie questions while his eyes never leave the bright lit screen that displays a simulation of the game.
"That's exactly the point. These types of classic games are considered lame for the regular Arcade goers." I explain trying to act calm but in my mind, I'm patting myself on the back for remembering to bring twenty quarters with me. It's not my regular amount that I'd bring if I went to the Arcade with Reece but at least twenty quarters will be enough to surely get Charlie addicted to this old school type of gaming.
I insert one quarter into the slot and the screen immediately changes to it's gaming mode with a single screen option popping up in green and it spells 'play'. I kindly motion for Charlie to take the first attempt.
"Right, our generation prefers games where you blow shit up." Charlie adds in as he takes his spot at the machine. He sets one hand on the joystick and his other hand over the green button to initiate the game and activate Pac-man's offensive ghost killing moves. Like what happened before at the Cafe, hearing Charlie swear again nearly made me lose feeling in my legs.
A British accent swearing will be the death of me but he is spot on when it comes to our generations taste in gaming. I can't help but laugh while Charlie begins on level one. "That and goat simulator."
"What in the name of Pac-man is that?" Charlie asks but his eyes never wonder off from the screen. He is in his gamer mode.
"It's exactly how it sounds like. You're a goat and you rain havoc on anything, and I mean anything." I tell him, not including the fact that I spent a solid hour and a half on Goat Simulator just making the goat run in circles to see if it could catch its tail.
I'll leave that story for another time if, by some chance, Goat Simulator comes up in our conversation again.
Charlie only nods his head as he finishes collecting the yellow circle. "So," he begins while level two is loading, "are you gonna eliminate the space between you and Reece?"
"What? I thought you understood the reason why I need some space in the first place." I answer through gritted teeth, not liking the fact that I have to continue on with this pathetic lie.
I seriously need to take a class on basic lying skills.
Charlie merely nods his head while, at the same time, acquiring the ability to eat up all the ghosts. "I can see Bailey understanding your issue with her being a girl and all but Reece? Us guys are completely clueless when it comes to women problems."
"So?" I ask him.
Charlie advances onto level two. "So, he has no idea why you're avoiding him." I resist the urge to laugh, knowing that Reece is perfectly aware that it's his fault that I'm avoiding him.
It's also my fault for blurting out my feelings in his face the moment he least saw it coming.
A scowl forms on my face, hating the fact that my subconscious is right that it is technically my fault.
I want to cross my arms but my bullet wound is still a bit sore. At least it has healed over the past two weeks to the point where I just have minor bruising around my scar. It still hurts at times when I move my left shoulder at a certain angle so I won't risk it. I resort to stuffing my hands inside the pockets of my sweater. "I'm sure Reece has been fine without me these past couple of days."
Charlie chuckles and shakes is head, "And I'm sure it's the opposite."
I frown, "what do you mean?"
"Zada," Charlie sighs, "Reece misses you."
The words that I wanted to say get stuck in my throat the moment Charlie said that. Whatever I was going to say is long forgotten because the idea that Reece might actually miss me has my body humming in happiness. My heart rate has accelerated and I can't help but feel guilty.
Did I just feel happy because there might be a slim chance that Reece misses me? That he's hurting?
Oh smoking socks! How could I think that? I'm no sadist! I should be concerned, filled with never ending worry, instead of joy.
If there was a trash can nearby, I would throw up right in it without a second thought. That's how disgusted I am with myself.
"And you miss him."
I almost didn't catch that. I waited a few seconds to process Charlie's words, unsure if I really heard him right. Charlie just stated out loud that I miss Reece.
He just declared the truth.
At this point, I can't prevent my cheeks from flushing scarlet. "N-n-no I don't." I should just go find a trash can and hide in it until Charlie forgets about my existence. How will he believe such a pathetic lie like that when I couldn't help but stutter?!
"And I'm not British but we both know that's a lie." Charlie replies, confirming that he doesn't buy my lie.
With my good arm, I scratch the back of my head. "Let's just say, hypothetically, that I do in fact miss Reece. I can't just barge back into his life. He has a girlfriend now. I don’t want to be an unnecessary third wheel."
"Quite making up excuses."
"They're not excuses, Charlie. They're facts." I correct him.
Charlie, whose gaze is still locked on the arcade game, rolls his eyes. If I weren't standing right beside him, I would have missed that subtle action completely. "In your case," the Brit says, "they're one and the same thing."
Like a little kid, I stubbornly mumble,"no, they're not."
The game's speakers make a flopping sound, indicating that Charlie lost as Pac-man gets eaten by a pink ghost with no more lives to spare. The screen then goes to show his score, which is no where close to the high ranks displayed below but at least Charlie managed to reach level five before dying. That's way farther then I went on my very first go.
I couldn't get past level one.
"How about this," Charlie turns around so he can face me, "let's make a bet. If you beat me at any game here in this arcade, you can continue on ignoring Reece. If I win then you go to Reece immediately after and fix your guys' friendship."
I ponder of a few seconds on Charlie's proposition. It's without a doubt that I don't want to stop avoiding Reece. I want to prolong his rejection for as long as I can but if I turn down Charlie's challenge, that will make me look like a wimp. I never back down from a bet.
"You chose which game," I tell him, not worried whatsoever. Charlie is an arcade virgin. He doesn't stand a chance against my expertise.
Charlie grins and takes a look around the neon lit arcade. It only takes him a few seconds to spot what he's been look for. He points to some game behind me and exclaims, "that!"
I turn around and all the blood drains from my face.
There, standing in all its glory across the room, is a vacant basketball arcade game. "Ugh...that's not what I had in mind," I tell Charlie, hoping that maybe he actually meant the boxing arcade machine beside the basketball one.
Charlie gives me a once over, noticing my worry, and raises an eyebrow. "I thought you said I could pick."
"Do I look like a person who did well in P.E.?" I ask, motioning at my pathetic body with low muscle coverage. I look exactly like one of those kids every gym class has: the scrawny kid that every one avoids because she lacks hand eye coordination.
"Does that mean your disqualifying yourself from the bet?" I frown at Charlie's question to which he just smiles back. Of course, I can't back down. Then, Charlie would automatically win and I'd have to confront Reece.
I move my gaze from the British heartthrob to, what has got to be, one of the biggest challenges of my life. "You go first," I tell him and we both walk up to the game. I insert a quarter into the game sloth to start the game then step back to give Charlie all the room he needs.
"Wish me luck," he has the decency to wink at me playfully. His accent doesn't help either.
"The objective of the game is to not make it into the net," I answer back in monotone.
Charlie just laughs and begins his round. He didn't notice that the game is timed for two minutes so the few seconds he spent talking with me cost him.
Ha!
But those four seconds weren't that big of a loss for him.
The game has three available basketballs to which the player has to shoot it over a caged barrier, into the hoop for two points. It sounds easy and Charlie sure proves it. The moment he started, Charlie has been getting slam dunks. A few cases, he used the back board to get the basketball in the net but nonetheless, his score won't stop rising.
36 points with one minute and fifteen seconds to spare.
"Could you do me a favour and stop being so good?" I ask, watching Charlie get his 38th point.
Charlie looks at me for a second with a ball in his hand. He seems to be in deep thought before he shakes his head,"nah, the victory is all mine," and he shoots another basket in.
One minute remaining.
"Come on man! At least give me some chance of catching up." But Charlie ignores my plea.
Thirty seconds remaining. I just want to run away from the steadily raising numbers on the score board.
Twenty seconds remaining. A crowd has formed around Charlie and I because a few kids noticed my nervous reaction to Charlie's talent. Everyone around me is cheering him on while I throw in an occasional boo here and there.
But the triple digits on the board make me change my tactic.
Ten seconds remaining. "Okay, Charlie, you can stop already. You're clearly taking the victory!"
"Not until the buzzer goes off!"
And with the remaining five seconds, Charlie scores three more baskets for a whooping total of 122 points.
I might as well go find Reece now.
Charlie turns around to face me so I can see his big grin. "You're turn."
Great, just flipping unicorns great! How in the name of all things magical am I supposed to overcome 122 points? I have to shot more than 61 hoops! With my basketball skills, that goal is impossible.
"Needa sub?"
Charlie and I both look to our right to see a girl, a few years younger than us, staring at me. Her hands are in the pockets of her Adidas track sweats while she has on a purple puma sweater to compliment her black and white pants. Her brown hair is pulled up in a high, messy bun, displaying her confident facial features. All this indicates that she is athletic.
Did she just ask if I wanted her to be my substitute?
"You can't do that," Charlie tells me.
"We never set up any ground rules," I reply back, giving the young girl a big thumbs up. "You think you can beat him?"
The girl scoffs, "please, it'll be a piece of cake."
"Better be the most delicious piece of cake you've ever played. You're in!" I exclaim, despite Charlie's protest.
"No fair, that's cheating! He mumbles.
"Oh please! I never had a chance anyways to beat you myself. Besides, it doesn't hurt to ask for help every once in a while." I toss the girl a quarter and she catches it effortlessly, giving me a taste of her incredible reflexes. Not as impressive as the Super Trio but, for a regular teenage girl, it's pretty sweet.
She puts the coin in and the game begins. The girl doesn't waste a second and immediately starts scoring hoops one by one as quickly as she can.
My nerves dissipated by the second while I watch my score (well, technically the girl's) rise steadily, slowly catching up to Charlie's 122.
"This is so not fair," Charlie states, displeased while the girl reaches 100 points and a whole minute to spare.
I'm jumping in my spot. "Yes, Yes! Crush him!"
I will actually win. Thanks to this girl, I will win Charlie's bet and get to avoid Reece for another who knows how long time!
The score is now 118. Just three more shots. That's all she needs to score to win my the challenge and she has loads of time.
Thirty five seconds is loads of time.
Then, the worst thing that could occur in an arcade, happened.
The girl's phone began to ring and her ring tone sounds oddly Darth Vader themed.
That wasn't the worst part. The ringing, as scary as it sounded, wasn't what had me wanting to pull all my hair off my head.
The girl with the amazing basketball talents who was three hoops away from winning me the challenge, abruptly stopped playing, reached into her pocket, and pulled out her phone.
Charlie and I are silent as we observe the girl. I will myself to keep clam.
Maybe she's going to silence her phone so that she can concentrate on winning. She still has twenty eight seconds to win for me. That's plenty of time.
But the girl answers her phone.
"What do you want, mom?" She asks, sounding annoyed.
My eyes nearly bulged out of my eyes at that moment. I can hear Charlie chuckling beside me but I can barely focus on him.
"What are you doing?!" I yell.
The girl actually waves at me to quiet down as she continues to talk to her mom on the other line of the phone call. "Mom, I'm just at the arcade. I'll be home in half an hour."
Her mom doesn't seem pleased at the answer because we can hear her muffled yells from where we're standing.
"Mom! Stop worrying! I'm not a kid anymore." The girl groans.
The timer flashes, a sign that there's ten seconds remaining.
No!
"No! Hang up and shoot the stinking hoops! You can call your mom right after!" I desperately yell. At this point, Charlie is laughing up a storm.
5 seconds left.
The girl finally realizes that she's running out of time. "Bye mom!" She shuts her phone and jams it in her pocket.
She picks up a basketball just as the buzzer goes off.
"Yes!" Charlie exclaims.
"No!" I scream.
"Opps..." the girl doesn't bother to stay and face my wrath. She picks up her phone and starts dialing to her mom as she walks away.
I glare daggers at her back.
I feel a pat on my shoulder. "Looks like I won Zada and you know what that means!" Charlie teases me. Thankfully he remembers about my shoulder and patted the healthy one instead.
I puff out in frustration but realize something very important. "Even though you've won, I have no idea where Reece is right now. Looks like I'll have to talk to him on Monday." And maybe Charlie will forget all about this bet so that I can continue to avoid Reece.
But Charlie is aware of my motif. "Oh no, you're going to do what I said. We're both going to go to Reece right now."
"Didn't you hear what I said? I have no idea where he is!"
Charlie smirks, "but I do."