"Yoongs, I got you a new bath bomb; it's like peach or lemon or-"
My heart dropped as I found my boyfriend of four years on the couch with a cute boy underneath him. He was significantly smaller than both me and Yoongi, which surprised me because I didn't know anyone smaller than our friend Jimin. He sort of looked like Yoongi, too. Well, they were both pale as hell with similar facial features, but they definitely weren't related. But I've seen this boy in this situation four times this year, and I knew his name.
Jihoon pushed Yoongi off of him as he heard my voice boom through the semi-silent apartment, face beet-red with embarrassment and neck covered in hickies from my boyfriend. He knew this was wrong; to let my boyfriend cheat on me with him. He fucking knew, yet there he was again underneath Yoongi. Still, I couldn't be mad at Jihoon at all; he was a sweet boy and apologized to me so many times. He even went as far as crying because he felt so bad to help my boyfriend hurt me. He was lucky I was too forgiving to ever hate him.
"Taehyung! I-I'm sorry! I'll just g-go," Jihoon mumbled as he quickly slipped on his shoes, grabbed his jacket and dashed out the door. He mumbled one more apology to me as he ran past me, but my eyes were focused on my boyfriend, who was busy buttoning his shirt back up, all the while grumbling under his breath.
I sighed and shook my head, fighting off my tears. "You said you'd stop it," I mumbled pitifully before moping into the kitchen, unloading groceries and setting Yoongi's bath bomb on the bar. When all the groceries were put away, Yoongi entered the kitchen and wrapped me up in a backhug, kissing my cheek the best he could. "I'm sorry, I really am. You know I only do it because I feel like I'm not good enough for you," he whispered, and that was when I smelled the alcohol on his breath.
Anger bubbled in my stomach as I nudged him off of me. "You said you'd stop drinking, too. When are you going to live up to your word?" I snapped and it seemed to knock him sober. He sighed and spun me around, his rough hands holding mine. His hands were small compared to mine, but not as small as Jimin's. It was still so nice to feel Yoongi hold my hands like they were his lifeline, like they kept him grounded.
He tilted my head so that I'd look at him, and I noticed how sincerity swam in his eyes. "Taehyung, I do love you. I'm sorry I put you through hell, okay? I'm sorry. But, I need you. I need you with me. Please, please don't leave me. Please..." he whispered, pecking my lips with every 'please' and I couldn't help but kiss him back.
I hated how forgiving I was, how much he had control over me. But fuck, I didn't want to leave him and I fell for his words. I sniffled and let him kiss me deeply, tasting the vodka on his tongue and praying that he truly would stop just for me. "I love you too, hyung," I panted once we parted and let him push me up against the counter.
He kissed me harshly and trailed his kisses down across my jaw, neck and collar bones. He slowly got down on his knees in front of me, resting his chin on my thigh as he looked up at me. "I'll show you, Tae. I'll show you how much I love and need you. You're mine and I'm yours and I promise I'll stop fucking up," he said as he unzipped my pants. I let my hand take a hold of his hair as he pulled down my boxers.
And this was how he got me to stay with him, even though he broke my heart.
"Hey, TaeTae! Is it just you or are you waiting for Yoongi?" the waiter, my friend Hoseok, said as he came over to my table. Jung Hoseok was a literal ray of sunshine who worked at my favorite restaurant when he wasn't teaching at the dance studio. He made the black and white uniforms look absolutely adoreable; he was really the only one who could, anyways. The last time I was here, his hair was blood-red, but now it was a nice auburn, since the brown dye couldn't cover up the red completely.
I gave him a small smile and shrugged. "I'm waiting for Yoongi, but you think you would bring me a sweet tea and breadsticks?" I asked sheepishly. Hoseok nodded as he scribbled in his notepad before ruffling my hair. "Of course I can. Breadsticks are free, anyways. I'll be right back," he cheered before he disappeared around the corner.
A sigh escaped my lips as I watched him walk away. I've known him for about a year and two months, and he immediately caught my attention. He was just so upbeat and cheery and... not Yoongi. Of course I loved my boyfriend, but there was something about Hoseok that drew me to him. I didn't have a crush on him, but I definitely was interested in this sunshine.
"Here's your tea and your breadsticks. Sorry it took so long; people are a little... demanding. So, when's your boy supposed to be here?" Hoseok asked about five minutes later. I pouted as I broke a breadstick in multiple pieces. "When Youngjae seated me..." I grumbled and out of my peripheral vision, I noticed Hoseok frown slightly. "I'm sorry, Tae. I already told Youngjae to bring him over when he gets here, though. Hang in there. He's probably busy," he beamed and brushed my bangs back when he was sure no one was looking. I nodded and smiled the best I could before taking a bite of broken breadstick.
I waited for two fucking hours. The restaurant was nearly empty, save for the bar. I was the only one in Hoseok's section, and I think I surprised him when he walked out of the kitchen with his apron gone; he finished his shift.
"Tae? It will be closing time in an hour. He didn't show?" Hoseok asked quietly, hand resting on my shoulder. My bottom lip started to tremble and tears threatened to fall out of pure anger and disappointment. Hoseok sighed and moved to sit in the booth across from me, tapping my hand to get me to look up at him.
I've never seen such genuine concern in a pair of eyes before. Then again, everything Hoseok did was genuine. "Talk to me," he cooed and a sob escaped my lips as he took my hand. "T-today was o-our anniversary! H-he never misses it!" I cried and Hoseok held my hand tightly in his. Again, his hands weren't as big as mine, but they were warmer than Yoongi's and filled with dancing callouses. It somehow made me feel a little better, even though they weren't my boyfriend's hands.
"Shh, TaeTae. Hobi's here. Hyung's here for you," Hoseok cooed and I never heard such pure and sincere words in my life. I felt his thumb rub slow circles on the back of my hand and I sniffled a little, lifting my head to give him a small smile. "Thanks, Hoseok-hyung. I think I'm going to go home now. I'm sorry I ate all the breadsticks." I giggled at the last part and a fond smile washed across Hoseok's sweet face.
We stood up and he gave me one last hug. He was warm and lean and almost as tall as me and I decided that hugging him was really nice. And he hugged me like he was protecting me from the world, which is really what I needed at the moment. His hug gave me a little bit of strength and I smiled a genuine smile against his shoulder.
"Take care, okay? If you need me, you know my hours," Hoseok mumbled as he let me go. He ruffled my hair one last time with a smile and I told him goodnight.
"Where the fuck were you!? I was worried sick!" Yoongi yelled the minute I entered the house. I glared at him as I took my shoes off. "I was at the restaurant for our anniversary! I waited for two fucking hours and your ass never showed the fuck up! And if you were truly worried sick, then you would have at least called or texted!" I yelled back.
But it was the way that Yoongi didn't stand up properly, the way he swayed slightly when he walked towards me told me that he broke his promise. And the hickey on his neck told me he really broke his promise.
"You said we would meet at the bar!" he yelled and I looked at him closer. His eyes were red and unfocused; high and drunk. On our anniversary. I bit back the tears that threatened to fill my eyes and said calmly, "No, Yoongi-hyung. No I didn't. We talked about this earlier."
All I got was a slap to the face. Hard. It stung and felt like it ripped some of my skin off. Yoongi had on a ring that I never gave to him. I could feel where it collided with my cheekbone, a bruise already forming there. His glare was cold and full of hatred.
"Why did I ever think to get with you? Always talking about yourself, Taehyung. Always!" Anger rolled through me as I punched him in the jaw, knocking him back a few feet. "How could you say that? Yoongi, I've been talking about us! I've always been concerned with you and how you are and if you're okay and what it would be like to marry you. How could you say that!?" I whispered the last part as my tears flowed down my cheeks in a steady stream.
Yoongi was stunned, so I took the opportunity to run to our bedroom and pack a bag with a few sets of clothes and my utilities bag, along with my charger and a few other things. I heard someone gasp and I turned my attention to the bed, where I found Jihoon. He was naked and was on my side of the bed. He looked at me with wide, scared eyes.
I pointed to him with a glare. "If he ever lays a hand on you, make sure he never sees the light of day. Got it?" I growled and he nodded quickly. "I'm sorry I drove you apart. I'm sorry I can't say no to him," he whimpered and my heart dropped. "No, it's not your fault. And that's how I was, too. For five years. Don't let him hurt you." And I was out the door before anyone could stop me.
"Taehyung?"
I looked up when I saw Youngjae staring at me with a confused look on his face. I was sitting on the curb at the restaurant, even though it didn't open until dinner time. He was dressed in his uniform, like I always saw him.
"Youngjae, do you have Hoseok-hyung's number?" I asked, voice cracking and giving my exhaustion away. He nodded and got out his phone, dialing a number. He talked to Hoseok for a minute, then hung up and sat down next to me. "He's on his way. I'll stay with you until he gets here, okay?" Youngjae said calmly and I nodded, bringing a fist up to rub my tired eyes.
In fifteen minutes, a silver car pulled up and Hoseok got out of the driver's side. He was dressed in a cute red flannel, which was opened to reveal a black shirt. He had a cute black hat to match and his ripped jeans hugged his legs perfectly. But his face was contorted with worry as he ran over to us.
He kneeled down in front of me and held my hands, giving them a light squeeze to make me look at him. "Hey, hey, hey. What's wrong, sweet boy? Why do you have that bag?" His voice was hushed and he spoke quickly, urgency plain as day in his eyes. "I... I need a place to stay," I whimpered and he nodded, then helped me to my feet.
Hoseok's house was only one level, but it was so much bigger than any apartment I could ever afford. It was cute and painted a light yellow, with neatly trimmed rose bushes lining it. The inside was very nice; high ceilings, sunroom, big kitchen, gigantic living room. Still, it gave off a sense of home and I immediately decided I loved this house.
"Come on, my room is this way. You can put your stuff there, then we'll talk," Hoseok said as he guided me down the hall to the room at the end. He had a big bedroom that opened up into a master bathroom, but it was slightly messy with clothes thrown haphazardly on the floor. I set my bag down in a corner and followed him back into the kitchen, where he started to make tea.
My phone rang in my back pocket, and I knew immediately who it was.
"Where are you?"
"None of your business."
"You're mine. Of course it's my business. Listen, I'm sorry okay? Please come home."
"No. I'm not coming back."
Hoseok took the phone from my hand and glared at the wall.
"Listen, unless you're going to be an adult and let him go, don't ever come near Kim Taehyung ever again because I will put you in an early grave. Goodbye."
I could only stare as Hoseok smiled and handed me my phone. This boy was terrifying when he was mad.
Once the tea was ready, he poured it into two mugs and we sat down at the island across from each other. "What happened?" Hoseok asked as he took a sip of tea. I sighed as I stared at the steam rolling off of my own mug and shrugged. "He... He was high and drunk and... He hit me. He never hit me before." I started to cry again and Hoseok stood up to move behind me.
He massaged my shoulders and I continued to tell him everything else from the beginning. I started from the first day I found Jihoon in my bed, the first time Yoongi came home drunk until last night; the first time Yoongi laid a hand on me. It took me two hours and my tea was cold by the time I took the first sip. Hoseok listened the entire time, moving to sit in front of me again and hold my hand thirty minutes into my explanation.
"And you stayed because you were scared he was the only one that would ever pay you any attention, would ever say 'I love you'?" Hoseok asked once I was done. I nodded and frowned into my tea, which was meant for stress relief. I heard him sigh and take my hand again. "I hate to tell you this, but I don't at the same time because it's true. Taehyung, you're absolutely beautiful and sweet and funny and Yoongi is a fool and a coward who didn't know what he had," he said sternly.
I smiled at him and squeezed his hand back. "Thanks, Hoseok. And... I promise I'll leave by the end of the week. I don't want to be a burden to you." Hoseok's eyes widened and he shook his head wildly. "No! Stay as long as you need to! Plus, I kind of always wanted some company around here. It's lonely and I often get noise complaints because I blare music to make myself less lonely..."
Oh, that face. He had a cute little pout and it made me frown and turn the corners of his mouth back into a forced smile. I giggled because he looked so cute and stupid with my fingers forcing a deformed smile, which finally turned genuine as he started to chuckle at my antics. "I'll stay if you really want me to," I said as I set my hands back in my lap. Before I could move them too far, Hoseok had taken my hands in his and squeezed them softly. "Thanks, Tae. I promise I won't throw you out."
About two weeks later, I received a phone call from someone I thought would actually leave me alone. I was laying on the couch while Hoseok and I watched an anime I managed to get him hooked on, even though he said he didn't like Anime. He looked at me curiously as I sighed and answered the phone, sending him a shrug.
"Taehyung." God, Yoongi sounded so awful I almost felt bad for him. He sounded like he hadn't slept in months.
"What?"
"Can you and I talk? Like, face-to-face?"
"Why? I made it pretty clear that I'm done with you."
"Taehyung, please? You deserve that much."
"Fine. Date, place and time and you better be there."
"The café we met in. Three hours from now."
"Alright. See you soon."
Hoseok nudged my shoulder as I ended the call and set my phone on the coffee table. "What was that about?" he asked quietly and rested his head on my shoulder. He had a habit of doing that when he sensed I was upset, sort of like a puppy. It made my heart melt a little. "Yoongi wants to talk something out with me at five. Will you come with me? I just... I don't want to do this alone. You don't have to sit with me; I prefer you not to. Just be there in case anything happens?"
He nodded and pinched my cheek lightly. "Of course, TaeTae. I got you. And it's best if you talk it out with him, you know. It will make you feel better."
I entered the café at 4:50 with Hoseok by my side. I found Yoongi sitting in the corner with a latte in front of him and made my way over, leaving Hoseok to find his seat a few tables away. The closer I got to my ex boyfriend, the more I noticed how tired and upset he looked. His blonde hair was a mess under his beanie and his glasses looked like they were about to slip off of his face. When he looked up as I sat down, his eyes were swollen from crying and my heart clenched a little.
"What do you want to talk about, hyung?" I sighed and crossed my arms, leaning back in my chair. Yoongi's fingers fidgeted on the table and he inhaled a shaky breath to steady himself. "Just... I wanted to apologize to you for everything I've done. It probably means nothing to you, but I really just want to apologize and let you go," he said as his eyes pierced mine.
"I was shit to you, Taehyung. I know I was and I knew while we were dating that I treated you like shit and I tried so hard to stop and be the boyfriend you deserved but it wasn't that easy and I kept relapsing. I fucked up big time and I still can't believe I hit you. Out of all the years of being your disappointment of a boyfriend, I never wanted to physically hurt you and I did and I can't forgive myself. I can't forgive myself for how badly I treated you."
His voice cracked at the end and I felt bad as a tear ran down his cheek. I leaned forward and wiped it away with my thumb before I made him look at me again. "Hyung, you were a good boyfriend. The first few years were amazing. But I guess I wasn't enough and that's why you started to sleep around with Jihoon. I just wish it could have ended differently. I will forgive you as time goes on and I know you will be just fine in the future. Just... go get clean and forget about me and our relationship, okay?" I whispered gently and he nodded as he sniffled.
"I leave for treatment tomorrow. I just wanted to talk this out with you before I left in hopes you would forgive me and I could get better faster. I'm so sorry, Taehyung," he replied and I shook my head. "I will eventually forgive you. Text me when you come home from treatment, alright?" I replied and he nodded as we stood up. I gave him one last hug and he ruffled my hair like he used to before I joined Hoseok at the door again.
"I'm assuming it went well since he was smiling and so were you and you hugged," Hoseok said quietly as he handed me his hot chocolate. He sounded somewhat sad that Yoongi and I made up. "It went well. We're officially not a couple and he's going to get help tomorrow. I'm proud that he at least apologized and recognized his mistakes. He was never a bad person; just one who made bad decisions," I replied and the air around Hoseok seemed to relax a little.
About eight months later, Hoseok had to work and I decided to go visit him - plus, I was really hungry and wanted to eat something that wasn't ramen. Youngjae put me in Hoseok's section like always; the lonely duckling in a section full of couples on dates. It just made me salty because I used to go here with Yoongi and we'd be one of those couples laughing and talking about our days and hold hands. The truth was, I missed Yoongi a lot. Or maybe I missed not being lonely.
"Hi, TaeTae! What's wrong, got cooped up in the house?" Hoseok joked as he made his way over to my table in his cute little uniform, sleeves rolled up to his elbows. I scrunched my nose at him. "Maybe. Or maybe I got bored and wanted food and to also see my bestie at work. Is that so bad?" I replied and I didn't miss that fond smile he gave as he wrote down my order.
He ruffled my hair as he closed his notepad. "Thanks for coming to see me. It's been a shit day," he mumbled, then walked away. The minute he turned the corner, I sighed and played with the small container of sugar packets on the table. It always made me sad when he was having a bad day, but something else was bothering me: Hoseok.
Ever since I met him, I knew there was some form of attraction between us. Back then, I had been with Yoongi and didn't need to conflict myself. Plus, I was so happy and in love that Hoseok wasn't important. But now that we have grown so close, it was like all of those thoughts were resurfacing ten fold.
When Hoseok worked night shifts, I found myself laying in his bed missing him and wondering how it would feel to lay in that same bed with him every single night; or at least on nights I couldn't sleep or just wanted to cuddle with him. And I'd wake up in the morning in my own bed and frown at how cold and empty it was, how nice it would be to wake up in Hoseok's arms.
And when we relaxed in the living room together or I did my school work while he read, I often found myself staring blankly at him and how sweet he looked while his eyes moved across the pages. He looked so at peace in nothing but a loose t-shirt and boxers and his glasses, hair all fluffy from his refusal to do his hair unless he was going to get out of the house. Those times, I found myself describing his beauty instead of my expository essay.
But when I was assigned character development, I would write down everything I admired about Hoseok and how his natural beauty trumped that of my own. And sometimes I would catch myself slowly reaching out for his hand in the store or on coffee runs or when he would walk me to the university literature building downtown.
Maybe I was starting to feel something for him. Or maybe I have always felt something for him, and now that my head was clear, I finally saw the man in front of me was the man I truly needed in my life.
"Here, Tae. You alright?" Hoseok asked once he returned with my water and a basket of breadsticks. He pouted cutely as he ran a hand through my hair like he always did. I nodded and offered him my best smile, putting my hands on my cheeks cutely like I always did. "Just lost in thought, hyung. Thanks for my breadsticks," I replied and he nodded again before he smiled warmly and walked over to the couple in the corner, who looked pissed as hell.
The guy's face was flushed crimson in fury as he yelled at Hoseok about something that was out of his control. My poor best friend was calm and tried to calm the guy down, but Bruce Banner over there was starting to turn into the Hulk the more Hoseok tried to give a civil explanation. When the guy shot up, I was out of my seat and pulling my best friend behind me before anything bad could happen.
"Why are you yelling at him for something beyond his control? He wrote the order down correctly and entered everything in the register correctly; he's been working here for as long as I've known him. If you're too cheap to pay, then you shouldn't come here. He's only the messenger. Leave him alone," I growled at the guy, one hand firmly on Hoseok's arm to keep him behind me.
The girl with the Hulk-looking guy sighed and got out her purse. "He's the cheap one. I told him that I'd pay, but he doesn't listen to anyone. I'm really sorry," she said, but was cut off by her boyfriend. "And who do you think you are? I don't see a uniform on you." I scoffed and rolled my eyes, the little bit of adrenaline running through my system causing me to not think about my next words. "I'm his boyfriend."
Hoseok tensed up behind me and the guy sat down, face now red in embarrassment. "Oh," he said quietly and I quickly made my way back to the table, slumping down in the seat as I cursed myself silently. Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, FUCK. I did not mean to say that at all. Why did I have to embarrass myself like that; why did I have to embarrass Hoseok like that?
By the time I saw Hoseok again, the section was clear of all people except for me. A plate of fried bread dusted in powdered sugar was sat in front of me, as well as small bowls of chocolate and raspberry sauce. I lifted my head from the table to see Hoseok get settled in the seat across from me; weary and stressed out. "Hey, Tae," he sighed out and I hummed.
"Can we talk?" he asked after another beat of silence and I rubbed my eyes. "Hoseok-hyung, I know what you're going to say. I wasn't thinking clearly and I embarrassed you in front of a customer, but he looked like he was going to hit you and I didn't want that to happen. I know you're mad at me and I'm really sorry. Maybe this was why Yoongi-hyung cheated..."
Hoseok shut me up by shoving a piece of the dessert in my mouth. All I could do was eat and listen intently as he explained, "I'm not mad at you, Taehyung. Far from it, actually. And thank you for sticking up for me; I've had such a shit day and that was the last thing I wanted to deal with. I just..." he ran a hand through his slightly-messy hair and looked at me. "Do you like me?"
I froze with a bite of dessert in my mouth, eyes wide. But I quickly swallowed and let out a sigh, eyes going to my hands on the table. "Yeah, hyung. I like you a lot. I know I'm still getting over Yoongi-hyung, but my feelings for you are much different than what my feelings for him were. With him, he had his moments where he was cute and made me fall in love, but they never lasted long.
"With you... You have this disposition that makes me fall deeper and deeper every day; my feelings for you get stronger day by day." By the end of my explanation, Hoseok was smiling that sweet, fond smile he used when he was genuinely appreciative or pleasantly surprised.
"Well, I have a secret for you. I like you a lot, too." I smiled my wide, boxy smile and allowed him to hold my hand across the table. "When I first met you here with Yoongi, I was immediately drawn to you. You just looked so beautiful and lively to me, and I love how strange you are and just... I couldn't have you and it was really upsetting, but I pushed through it because now we're best friends and we live together and you make me so happy."
The feeling of his hand in mine made me ten times more happier than I already was due to his words. I couldn't believe that after all this time, Hoseok liked me just as much as I liked him. But then I remembered Yoongi and frowned. "Hyung... As much as I like you, I'm scared to be in a relationship again," I pouted and Hoseok squeezed my hand.
He shrugged and played with my hand. "I understand. We don't have to get together so soon. But... If you get lonely in the middle of the night or you can't sleep, come lay with me. And if you want to cuddle me or hold my hand, you can. You don't have to ask," Hoseok beamed and I sighed that lovesick sigh. "That goes for you, too," I mumbled and he chuckled lightly.
Almost a year later, Hoseok and I were napping on the couch, since he had a rough day at work and my exams were killing me. He was laying on me as he slept, letting me trace patterns on his back underneath his shirt. It was nice to be surrounded by silence, save for the soft piano music playing on the stereo.
We had been dating for about two months, but we still acted like we did since we confessed to each other, save the makeout sessions and showering together sometimes, or just walking around naked because why not.
But for the moment, we were both at peace.
I kissed the top of his head and continued to rub his back with a fond smile on my face. When we finally became an official couple, he promised me that he wouldn't hurt me and that if he ever did, he would immediately let me go so that I wouldn't get dragged along like I was with Yoongi. And I promised him that I would treat him like he deserved. We promised each other the world, and so far, we were doing pretty well with that accomplishment.
Want me to do this from Yoongi's point of view? Cuz I kinda want to but idk. Happy Days!
- Tae