Thursday, October 6, 2016
Jack
Hey Ceci, will you be around tomorrow? I need to talk about Gary's trial before I'm pulled away for another trial in two weeks.
Friday, October 7, 2016
Ceci
Yes, is there a good time?
Jack
Now
Ceci
O
Jack
U?
Ceci
K
Monday, October 10, 2016
Jack
Ceci! Just found these dudes. Love at first hear!!
(Slow it Down Now by Green Buzzard)
(Zoo Fly by Green Buzzard)
Ceci
I'm staying to watch these cuties.
Jack
On that hit-and-run car accident I was in, they totaled my car. Doctor says I got a concussion. Kinda blows. I liked that car. And my brain.
Ceci
Oh bummer.
You had full coverage? What kind of car do you want next?
Jack
Yeah, and my lawyer, Bob, says I'm going to get hosed on the car.
Whatever. I'm sticking with a Subaru wagon. Reliable, all-wheel drive, great gas mileage, and super sexy!
Let's compare automobile sexual potency. Dude in a Trans-Am, dye-job hair, man jewelry, man cleavage. He gives you a wink. Verdict? IMPOTENT.
In contrast, Subaru wagon, overflowing with kids, sippy cups, Etch-a-Sketches, dogs, and pool toys falling out of the windows. The guy driving gives you a wink. Verdict: POTENT.
Tuesday, October 11, 2016
Jack
Live reporting from the front:
In one week we begin an unusual Driving while under the influence of drugs (DUID) trial in Kansas. I don't really do DUID trials, but the client was referred to us by a psychiatrist from the medical school, so we accepted the fight. The client is a 74-year-old woman with a long history of mental health conditions, including delusions, hallucinations, etc. She is also a complete sweetheart. A "bless-your-heart", adorable, southern belle, who likes to dress up in loud prints, big hats, and leather boots. Weighs about 97 pounds.
Through investigation, we learn she was seen by her psychiatrist one day before her DUID arrest. He noted in her file that she presented with hallucinations and paranoia, and was getting more entrenched in her delusions. The next day, she was pulled over for driving erratically at night, with her headlights off. When the cop approached her car, she blurted out that she was being followed by strangers who were filming her and posting her videos on YouTube. The cops noted she was also in physical distress.
But then the official "Drug Recognition Expert" officer was called in. She told the officer she was seeing a psychiatrist and was on some psychoactive meds. He disregarded all that and began to spin a tale of drug addiction, specifically trying to make out that our 74-year-old lady was "tweaking" on methamphetamine.
Her symptoms were hyperactivity, jitters, twitchy, over-talkative, and paranoid. He administered a breath test. She blew 000s, no alcohol. They took her blood for the lab. Then, charged her with Driving under the influence of Drugs. The blood test came back negative for meth, but positive for her prescriptions. The next day, due to her mania and hallucinations, her psychiatrist had her committed to a mental ward for 3 weeks.
The lead up to the trial has been hard fought. A state-appointed expert found her to be legally insane at the time of the incident. The DAs responded by trying to throw out the Court's expert. I went off like a thunder storm on the supervising DA about convicting and incarcerating the mentally ill. He said I was "too personally involved in the defense" and refused to talk to me except in written form. We have since overcome that barrier, but it has been an ugly road.
Ceci
Terrible situation
I have the answer for these cases. Mass transit/public transportation
Jack
Ha! Yes!
At any rate, trial begins next week and our client is feeling the pressure. She is emotionally crumbling. She's going crazy. Last week, she called our witnesses and experts, and told them that they would not be needed for court. Took us a day to repair. But today! TODAY!! She came in and decided we should shitcan the whole mental health defense, and hire investigators to track down the imaginary strangers who have started following her again. Then, she went on and on and on about mystery cars and radio transmissions. In short, the pressure of the trial has pushed her into another psychotic breakdown. She is in my office. We have 7 days till trial, and she is climbing the walls. Minutes ago, she jumped on my couch, rolled on her back, stuck her skinny granny legs up in the air, and started cycling her feet like she was riding an invisible bicycle (she's wearing a skirt). After the bike ride, she jumps up on a table with her arms spread and moving like she's directing an airplane.
We got her psychiatrist on the phone, he's cranking her meds. By the first day of trial, I'm not sure if she will be in court or a mental ward.
Ceci
Holy moly, that is super intense, Jack. God, I feel terrible for her. I know when my friend Sandy is having a bad run it gets incredibly bad.
Jack
Yeah. She just stepped out to fill her new meds. If she doesn't level out, I'm going to ask her psychiatrist if I can hit her over the head with a shovel. She's not too big, I think I could smack her pretty good.
[⭐Vote⭐ for shovel therapy!]
Post Script: Ceci and I are grateful for all you readers. In particular, veilnebula, who is in the midst of publishing the sexy, action fantasy The Daughter's Blood, and NineLight who is publishing Hacking the Sun. We wait for, and devour, these books, chapter by chapter as they are released. Read these books. And we are also thankful for our sharp and gorgeous readers anonnytruths and mputaway6
Happy Thanksgiving!!
❤️Ceci & Jack
Photo: Station Wagon Old-Timer by MichaelGiada, 2014 (Pixabay #3422072).